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So my older brother is being buried today.
#1
So my older brother is being buried today.
There'll be a service in a church about a half hour from me but I'm not going.  Dave was a staunch and angry atheist, until depression in midlife drove him on a cross country oddyssy to go to Disney World in Florida.  Funny how he always returned to Disneyland as his go to happy place as an adult.  On the way back they stopped in Utah and that was it.  Dave was a mormon.

I got some things from my brother.  I learned everything I know about construction from him.  When I was depressed and quit my old job he hired me as his helper.  Hell I ate a lot of meals at their house back then, almost 40 years ago now.  But he was very, very difficult.

Besides being depressive himself he only ever really cared about making lots of money.  Never seemed to acquire any skill at any sport or activity other than his construction business though.  No people skills other than being a bully.  Horrible listener.  He has said a lot of hurtful things to pretty much everyone in my family over the years, though mostly not to me*.  Except for my youngest brother and myself though, they'll probably all be there.  Something about death to the religious is irresistible. 

He died of complications of diabetes brought on by an irrational, immature unwillingness to modify his eating habits.  I saw him less and less over the last several years.  Really, there just wasn't anything more to say in life and I sure don't have anything good to say about him now, especially not to his kids and wife.

I think I liked his wife even less than Dave.  She was petty, consumed by appearances and one of the dimmest people I know.  They really deserved each other.  I was the best man at their wedding.  Never cared for her but I could see why he did, they both lived for status.  Their kids are worse.  The eldest daughter chaired the republican, mormon backed proposition to ban marriage to gay people in California.  She converted to become Greek Orthodox to marry a lawyer whose specialty is breaking unions. I de-friended his older son on Fb because he was always arguing for conservative values.  His youngest son's favorite user name is "Future Elder", the mormons own him.

So, nope, not going.


*

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#2
RE: So my older brother is being buried today.
damn, that was a tough read.

had no idea . . . .
 The granting of a pardon is an imputation of guilt, and the acceptance a confession of it. 




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#3
RE: So my older brother is being buried today.
I completely support this. Heart
"Hipster is what happens when young hot people do what old ladies do." -Exian
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#4
RE: So my older brother is being buried today.
(April 8, 2017 at 12:11 pm)vorlon13 Wrote: damn, that was a tough read.

had no idea . . . .


Yeah families suck sometimes.
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#5
RE: So my older brother is being buried today.
Loosing a member of the family is always tough, whether you like them or not. My condolences. Just retain the best memories.
I don't have an anger problem, I have an idiot problem.
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#6
RE: So my older brother is being buried today.
Sorry to see this.   Consoling
If you get to thinking you’re a person of some influence, try ordering somebody else’s dog around.
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#7
RE: So my older brother is being buried today.
Sorry to read this, W'ist.

I hope time brings you comfort. Heart
"There remain four irreducible objections to religious faith: that it wholly misrepresents the origins of man and the cosmos, that because of this original error it manages to combine the maximum servility with the maximum of solipsism, that it is both the result and the cause of dangerous sexual repression, and that it is ultimately grounded on wish-thinking." ~Christopher Hitchens, god is not Great

PM me your email address to join the Slack chat! I'll give you a taco(or five) if you join! --->There's an app and everything!<---
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#8
RE: So my older brother is being buried today.
Go to your brothers funeral, lol.  You know you love him.  You miss him.  It's the last you'll see of him.  If we snubbed each others funerals just because people were dicks there wouldn;t -be- any funerals.  Wink
I am the Infantry. I am my country’s strength in war, her deterrent in peace. I am the heart of the fight… wherever, whenever. I carry America’s faith and honor against her enemies. I am the Queen of Battle. I am what my country expects me to be, the best trained Soldier in the world. In the race for victory, I am swift, determined, and courageous, armed with a fierce will to win. Never will I fail my country’s trust. Always I fight on…through the foe, to the objective, to triumph overall. If necessary, I will fight to my death. By my steadfast courage, I have won more than 200 years of freedom. I yield not to weakness, to hunger, to cowardice, to fatigue, to superior odds, For I am mentally tough, physically strong, and morally straight. I forsake not, my country, my mission, my comrades, my sacred duty. I am relentless. I am always there, now and forever. I AM THE INFANTRY! FOLLOW ME!
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#9
RE: So my older brother is being buried today.
(April 8, 2017 at 2:28 pm)Khemikal Wrote: Go to your brothers funeral, lol.  You know you love him.  You miss him.  It's the last you'll see of him.  If we snubbed each others funerals just because people were dicks there wouldn;t -be- any funerals.  Wink


In some failed sense I'm sure that's true.  But he wasn't all that much to look at when he was alive and I hate the way they make up corpses.  But mostly I didn't go (past tense) because I really dislike his wife and kids.  Dealing with their crazy religious ideas is enough fun in the best of times.  They feel even more entitled to their crazy in times like these.  Nah, I'm good.  Family mostly disappoints me.  I'm grateful for my youngest brother, my youngest aunt and one cousin.  Toward the best of the rest, I feel something like the affection one might feel for the gentle family cow.  Grateful for the milk but  meh.

(April 8, 2017 at 2:02 pm)SteelCurtain Wrote: Sorry to read this, W'ist.

I hope time brings you comfort. Heart


Thanks but I'm good.  I'm in that season when this isn't unexpected.  At 65, he could have gone longer if he gave a shit but nothing I could think to say had any effect on that.  He was done.  

I've thought a lot about him today.  That's enough. I'm really felt a greater loss when my last two dogs died.  

Personally, I still feel emboldened to make a twenty year plan but his dying isn't something we won't all do in time.  I just wish my wife's prospects were better.  I tell her I won't accept less than ten more years or I'll sue her for breach of contract.
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#10
RE: So my older brother is being buried today.
(April 8, 2017 at 12:24 pm)Whateverist Wrote:
(April 8, 2017 at 12:11 pm)vorlon13 Wrote: damn, that was a tough read.

had no idea . . . .


Yeah families suck sometimes.

um . . .


my seeming relentless slamming of Mormonism might have been experienced by you as rather harsh in view of the family thing . . .


I'm not sure what to say about it . . . .
 The granting of a pardon is an imputation of guilt, and the acceptance a confession of it. 




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