Our server costs ~$56 per month to run. Please consider donating or becoming a Patron to help keep the site running. Help us gain new members by following us on Twitter and liking our page on Facebook!
Current time: April 23, 2024, 7:37 pm
Atheist Forums › Discussion › Humor v
Wishmaster 2018

Poll: Another poll for absolutely no reason.
This poll is closed.
I love this game. Cinjin you're brilliant.
83.33%
 5 83.33%
I love these awesome polls even more. Please never stop making them.
16.67%
 1 16.67%
Total 6 vote(s) 100%
* You voted for this item. [Show Results]

Thread Rating:
  • 0 Vote(s) - 0 Average
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
Thread Modes
Wishmaster 2018
Sal Offline
The fool
****
Religious Views: agnostic atheist apostate
Posts: 2692
Threads: 11
Joined: May 13, 2013
Reputation: 17
#71
RE: Wishmaster 2018
January 30, 2018 at 4:36 pm
(January 30, 2018 at 4:30 pm)vulcanlogician Wrote: I wish God could create a rock he couldn't lift.

Wish granted, but now this rock orbits in a geostationary orbit around the Earth blocking all the light from the Sun, all the time.

I wish I owned a billion dollars.
"The first principle is that you must not fool yourself — and you are the easiest person to fool." - Richard P. Feynman
Find
Reply
Mr.Obvious Offline
Dishonorably Discharged
***
Religious Views: Atheist Mantis does not pray.
Posts: 1176
Threads: 30
Joined: May 22, 2017
Reputation: 21
#72
RE: Wishmaster 2018
January 30, 2018 at 8:07 pm
(January 30, 2018 at 4:36 pm)Sal Wrote:
(January 30, 2018 at 4:30 pm)vulcanlogician Wrote: I wish God could create a rock he couldn't lift.

Wish granted, but now this rock orbits in a geostationary orbit around the Earth blocking all the light from the Sun, all the time.

I wish I owned a billion dollars.

Lol, I already wished for 3.

Wish granted. But you are now serving 15 consecutive life-time sentences for tax-evasion, with no chance for parole or early off for good behaviour.

I wish the renovations to my house were finished.
"If we go down, we go down together!"
- Your mum, last night, suggesting 69.
[Image: 41bebac06973488da2b0740b6ac37538.jpg]-
Find
Reply
Fireball Offline
Refractory Member
****
Religious Views: Atheist
Posts: 9338
Threads: 19
Joined: September 8, 2015
Reputation: 79
#73
RE: Wishmaster 2018
January 30, 2018 at 10:05 pm
(January 30, 2018 at 8:07 pm)Mr.Obvious Wrote:
(January 30, 2018 at 4:36 pm)Sal Wrote: Wish granted, but now this rock orbits in a geostationary orbit around the Earth blocking all the light from the Sun, all the time.

I wish I owned a billion dollars.

Lol, I already wished for 3.

Wish granted. But you are now serving 15 consecutive life-time sentences for tax-evasion, with no chance for parole or early off for good behaviour.

I wish the renovations to my house were finished.

Renovations are complete, but the contractors installed the bathroom exhaust fan so that it vents into the living room (I actually know a guy that this happened to!)

I wish for hot and cold running women. Tongue
If you get to thinking you’re a person of some influence, try ordering somebody else’s dog around.
Find
Reply
Cyberman Away
Beta cuck male
*****
Religious Views: Frisbeetarian
Posts: 25314
Threads: 239
Joined: August 26, 2010
Reputation: 156
#74
RE: Wishmaster 2018
January 30, 2018 at 10:40 pm
Granted. Unfortunately, they're all running the other way.

I wish perpetual motion was possible.
At the age of five, Skagra decided emphatically that God did not exist.  This revelation tends to make most people in the universe who have it react in one of two ways - with relief or with despair.  Only Skagra responded to it by thinking, 'Wait a second.  That means there's a situation vacant.'
Find
Reply
Fireball Offline
Refractory Member
****
Religious Views: Atheist
Posts: 9338
Threads: 19
Joined: September 8, 2015
Reputation: 79
#75
RE: Wishmaster 2018
January 30, 2018 at 11:25 pm
(January 30, 2018 at 10:40 pm)Cyberman Wrote: Granted. Unfortunately, they're all running the other way.

I wish perpetual motion was possible.

Granted, but it is a squirrel cage.

I wish that the Wishmaster 2018 thread was dead.
If you get to thinking you’re a person of some influence, try ordering somebody else’s dog around.
Find
Reply
Cyberman Away
Beta cuck male
*****
Religious Views: Frisbeetarian
Posts: 25314
Threads: 239
Joined: August 26, 2010
Reputation: 156
#76
RE: Wishmaster 2018
January 30, 2018 at 11:30 pm
Granted, however some idiot comes along and necroes it. Smile

I wish my mobile battery lasted longer.
At the age of five, Skagra decided emphatically that God did not exist.  This revelation tends to make most people in the universe who have it react in one of two ways - with relief or with despair.  Only Skagra responded to it by thinking, 'Wait a second.  That means there's a situation vacant.'
Find
Reply
Edwardo Piet Away
Devil's Supercardo.
Religious Views: Atheistic panexperientialism
Posts: 43162
Threads: 720
Joined: September 21, 2008
Reputation: 133
#77
RE: Wishmaster 2018
January 31, 2018 at 2:22 am
(January 30, 2018 at 1:47 pm)Cyberman Wrote:
(January 30, 2018 at 1:32 pm)Mr.Obvious Wrote: Granted. But for The rest of your life, you appear entirely in black and white.

More than worth it. Big Grin

Yep.

I would have instead said "Granted... you meet them both! At their graves..."
Find
Reply
vulcanlogician Offline
δικαιοσύνη
****
Religious Views: I Grok Spock
Posts: 5813
Threads: 86
Joined: November 19, 2017
Reputation: 59
#78
RE: Wishmaster 2018
January 31, 2018 at 7:23 am
(January 30, 2018 at 11:30 pm)Cyberman Wrote: Granted, however some idiot comes along and necroes it. Smile

I wish my mobile battery lasted longer.

Granted: all the apps on your phone that drain your battery no longer work properly.

I wish all women found me irresistable.
Find
Reply
KittyAnn Offline
Member
***
Religious Views: theist but curious
Posts: 1286
Threads: 15
Joined: October 31, 2017
Reputation: 36
#79
RE: Wishmaster 2018
January 31, 2018 at 7:55 am (This post was last modified: January 31, 2018 at 8:16 am by KittyAnn.)
(January 31, 2018 at 7:23 am)vulcanlogician Wrote: Granted: all the apps on your phone that drain your battery no longer work properly.

I wish all women found me irresistable.

Granted. But unfortunately you would be their slave... until the end of your life.. Tongue

I wish I were younger and have a teleporter Big Grin
"Alone is what I have. Alone protects me." 
“I may be on the side of the angels but don’t think for one second that I am one of them.”
“The important thing is not to stop questioning. Curiosity has its own reason for existence. One cannot help but be in awe when he contemplates the mysteries of eternity, of life, of the marvelous structure of reality. It is enough if one tries merely to comprehend a little of this mystery each day."
Find
Reply
Cyberman Away
Beta cuck male
*****
Religious Views: Frisbeetarian
Posts: 25314
Threads: 239
Joined: August 26, 2010
Reputation: 156
#80
RE: Wishmaster 2018
January 31, 2018 at 12:48 pm
Granted. You are now a foetus with the ability to teleport wherever you like.

I wish I could think of a wish.
At the age of five, Skagra decided emphatically that God did not exist.  This revelation tends to make most people in the universe who have it react in one of two ways - with relief or with despair.  Only Skagra responded to it by thinking, 'Wait a second.  That means there's a situation vacant.'
Find
Reply


Atheist Forums › Discussion › Humor v
Wishmaster 2018

Possibly Related Threads...
Thread Author Replies Views Last Post
  Borowitz 3-2-2018 Minimalist 2 302 March 2, 2018 at 9:59 pm
Last Post: Minimalist



Users browsing this thread: 1 Guest(s)