Ask a Former Jehovah's Witness

[Athena]

The key things that exjws tend to resent most about the cult are their shunning policies, their handling of child sexual abuse, and their policies on blood transfusions. 

Shunning: 

If you leave because you realize the religion isn't true, you're labeled an apostate and that's the lowest form of life from a JW perspective. You're irredeemable and a foul beast of a human. 

If you're kicked out, aka disfellowshipping, they think it's loving to not speak to you. They're bringing you back to Jehovah. 

If you're just trying to fade away without making a scene, they're still advised to limit contact with you as you are bad association. 

Child sexual abuse:

JWs are to report all serious sins to the elders. If there are two witnesses, the person can be kicked out even if they deny the claim against them. In the case of child sexual abuse, there are rarely witnesses. 

So, even if they can't kick someone out of the congregation they should call the cops, right? No. They call the legal department. The police are only notified if the legal department says it's ok. Whereas, if a Kingdom Hall was vandalized they'd call the police right away. No need to ask permission. Rape a child, maybe they'll call the cops. Spray paint a penis on the front door, hell yeah they call the cops.

Blood Transfusions:

To be very clear, if you have a JW relative and you have to decide if they get a blood transfusion, their petty god will fault you for it, not them. So, by all means, say yes. They have to say no. If you force them, they say it's like rape but they feel no guilt and they get to live.

Their policy on blood is silly. They can take parts of blood, but not whole blood. They can't donate blood, but they can take fractions of donated blood. 

Their policy is more based on a scripture in Acts than in Leviticus. Most people trying to prove their theology is wrong use the wrong scripture. Anyway, it says to "keep abstaining from blood" and then, ironically, "good health to you." 

Anything else you wanna know?

[Figbash]

Have you seen Truth be Told? That was eyeopening for me (someone who previously thought it was just a religion, and not a cult).

I have a question for you - why do JW halls have so few windows??

[vulcanlogician]

Have you ever done the door to door thing? If so, what was that like?

[arewethereyet]

The friend I mentioned in your intro thread went through some awful things when she left the JWs. Her mother and that whole side of the family were really deep in that faith. Her dad was not but tolerated it as far as the my friend and her siblings being forced to follow it. When my friend left she also left her JW husband and, because of the indoctrination, left her young daughter because she didn't think she had the right to take her from the JWs. She was publicly dis-fellowed. For several years she had very minimal contact with her daughter because the ex didn't allow her to be exposed to worldly things and people. When the daughter reached her early teens she spoke her mind in the courts and moved in with her mom and has since had a normal life with college, a photography business, and being part of a musical duo that performs around SC.


When my friend's grandmother was at the end of life and quite deeply into dementia my friend said that she was glad of the mental impairment because her grandmother didn't remember she had been dis-fellowed. Had the grandmother remembered my friend would not have been welcome to visit. That was one of the saddest things I have ever heard.


Early in her breaking away from the JWs she told me she didn't know what she would do if her daughter ever needed a transfusion. She still hadn't shaken off all the old 'rules'. Her younger brother had been involved in a horrible accident when he was about 19 and a transfusion was the only thing that saved him. Since their dad wasn't JW he gave his permission for the transfusion to be done. I reminded her of this and her response was that if he hadn't had that transfusion he probably wouldn't have HepC. Well, no, he'd be dead. I think that was the moment I realized how deeply ingrained the teachings were.


I watched her go through so much pain in those first few years. She had a great job and later met and married a great guy and they blended their families together and all's well in her world...but she went through hell getting to where she is now.

[The Valkyrie]

I’ve argued with relatives when I’ve called the Johos a cult.

I always finish with “You practice disfellowshipping which makes you a cult.”

As has been asked above, did you do door to door work?

And do they still practice that women aren’t to teach men even though women make up 60 to 70% of their number and seem to do all the door knocking?

[brewer]

I hope we don't overwhelm you with a rash of questions but I have a couple.

Now that you're out and looking back, would you consider JW a cult?

We probably all know the list but how strictly were all of these rules enforced? : https://cbncray.files.wordpress.com/2012...-rules.pdf

[Athena]

Have you seen Truth be Told? That was eyeopening for me (someone who previously thought it was just a religion, and not a cult).

I have a question for you - why do JW halls have so few windows??

I don't think I've seen that one. 

They eliminated windows for a decade or so because sound equipment would be stolen. It was just a security measure. They're building halls with windows again.

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Have you ever done the door to door thing? If so, what was that like?

Yes, and it's tedious. No one answers their doors. For the record, I think it's worthwhile to talk to them. They'll dismiss everything you say, but if they ever have doubts they need something to help them out. Something you said may come to mind. They're strictly forbidden from certain types of outside information so they can only get it while trying to convert people. 

The only good part about the ministry was break time. Donuts or coffee or something. That was good. The rest was torture.

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...I watched her go through so much pain in those first few years.  She had a great job and later met and married a great guy and they blended their families together and all's well in her world...but she went through hell getting to where she is now.

I'm glad things worked out. It's a difficult transition.

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I hope we don't overwhelm you with a rash of questions but I have a couple.

Now that you're out and looking back, would you consider JW a cult?

We probably all know the list but how strictly were all of these rules enforced? : https://cbncray.files.wordpress.com/2012...-rules.pdf

Cult has a few different meanings. I call it a cult, but it's also another way of saying it's a religion that isn't mainstream.

Some of those are rules like: no voting, running for office, attending other churches, etc. You can be kicked out for those. Others, like the social ones, are things most JWs would try to do, but it's not a rule. You can attend a social gathering after work. You can go to a wedding at a church. That kind of thing. And yeah, yoga and hypnotism give you demons. Now, I'm thinking I would do yoga if it gave me demons. At least it would be more interesting than what it actually is.

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I’ve argued with relatives when I’ve called the Johos a cult.

I always finish with “You practice disfellowshipping which makes you a cult.”

As has been asked above, did you do door to door work?

And do they still practice that women aren’t to teach men even though women make up 60 to 70% of their number and seem to do all the door knocking?

I did go door to door a lot and even started learning a foreign language. Millennialists do better in underprivileged communities. They promise a better world and all that. 

And yes. They still teach that. I had to wear a head covering to conduct a bible study in front of my 8-year-old son.

[vulcanlogician]

Can you say anything concerning the devaluation/distrust of higher education among JWs?

[brewer]

Are you looking forward to celebrating the upcoming holiday? With explosives?

[Athena]

Can you say anything concerning the devaluation/distrust of higher education among JWs?

Yeah. They say that sending your child to college is like sending them into a shark tank and hoping they can swim across. Sure, they might make it, but why take the risk?

What they fear is the study of science and philosophy. They say those two things will corrupt young minds. While they claim to embrace science, they say the scientific community is biased against God. 

They want members of the religion to view the religion as the primary source of information on everything. The Awake magazine has semi-scientific articles. They also have some books about creation vs. evolution. You're supposed to trust them above any other source.

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Are you looking forward to celebrating the upcoming holiday? With explosives?

We always celebrated it anyway because it was my parents' anniversary. That's the one thing you're allowed to actually celebrate annually.