Posts: 46102
Threads: 538
Joined: July 24, 2013
Reputation:
109
RE: cute
October 8, 2019 at 7:15 pm
(October 8, 2019 at 7:05 pm)Brian37 Wrote: (October 8, 2019 at 6:52 pm)BrianSoddingBoru4 Wrote: A baby Harp seal galumphs into a bar. The barman says, 'What'll you have?' and the seal says, 'Anything but a Canadian club.'
Boru
Seal walks into a bar, Bartender asks, "Would you like to try our special?"
Seal aks, "What is that?"
Bartender, "Club Sandwich."
Seal responds, "You are a fucking asshole."
Last line ruined that joke.
Know when to stop.
Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
Posts: 30726
Threads: 2123
Joined: May 24, 2012
Reputation:
71
RE: cute
October 8, 2019 at 7:53 pm
(October 8, 2019 at 7:15 pm)BrianSoddingBoru4 Wrote: (October 8, 2019 at 7:05 pm)Brian37 Wrote: Seal walks into a bar, Bartender asks, "Would you like to try our special?"
Seal aks, "What is that?"
Bartender, "Club Sandwich."
Seal responds, "You are a fucking asshole."
Last line ruined that joke.
Know when to stop.
Boru
How did I ruin that joke? I if I were a seal I wouldn't want someone offering me a club sandwich.
You like being beaten to death with a club? I don't know about you, but that hardly sounds like fun.
Posts: 35277
Threads: 204
Joined: August 13, 2012
Reputation:
146
RE: cute
October 8, 2019 at 8:18 pm
Is it true that the musician Seal never returned from a Canadian tour?
Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni:
"You did WHAT? With WHO? WHERE???"
Posts: 5664
Threads: 219
Joined: June 20, 2016
Reputation:
61
RE: cute
October 8, 2019 at 8:39 pm
(October 8, 2019 at 5:21 pm)BrianSoddingBoru4 Wrote:
Boru
It works best as a one liner : "A baby seal walks into a club...." Rim shot.
God thinks it's fun to confuse primates. Larsen's God!
Posts: 5690
Threads: 8
Joined: April 3, 2014
Reputation:
68
RE: cute
October 9, 2019 at 12:18 am
(October 8, 2019 at 7:15 pm)BrianSoddingBoru4 Wrote: (October 8, 2019 at 7:05 pm)Brian37 Wrote: Seal walks into a bar, Bartender asks, "Would you like to try our special?"
Seal aks, "What is that?"
Bartender, "Club Sandwich."
Seal responds, "You are a fucking asshole."
Last line ruined that joke.
Know when to stop.
Boru
Not enough lines.
Seal responds, "You are a fucking asshole."
Bartender, "I'm so sorry sir, I did not mean any offence."
Seal, "That's ok buddy, everyone makes mistakes."
Bartender, "Can I buy you a drink later after I knock off?"
Seal, "Sure."
Posts: 46102
Threads: 538
Joined: July 24, 2013
Reputation:
109
RE: cute
October 9, 2019 at 5:42 am
(October 8, 2019 at 7:53 pm)Brian37 Wrote: (October 8, 2019 at 7:15 pm)BrianSoddingBoru4 Wrote: Last line ruined that joke.
Know when to stop.
Boru
How did I ruin that joke? I if I were a seal I wouldn't want someone offering me a club sandwich.
You like being beaten to death with a club? I don't know about you, but that hardly sounds like fun.
You ruined it because 'Club sandwich' is the punchline. Traditionally, this is where jokes are meant to stop. It's actually a pretty good joke, you just told it badly.
Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
Posts: 2380
Threads: 43
Joined: October 30, 2017
Reputation:
48
RE: cute
October 9, 2019 at 4:17 pm
(October 9, 2019 at 5:42 am)BrianSoddingBoru4 Wrote: (October 8, 2019 at 7:53 pm)Brian37 Wrote: How did I ruin that joke? I if I were a seal I wouldn't want someone offering me a club sandwich.
You like being beaten to death with a club? I don't know about you, but that hardly sounds like fun.
You ruined it because 'Club sandwich' is the punchline. Traditionally, this is where jokes are meant to stop. It's actually a pretty good joke, you just told it badly.
Boru
You'll have him blubbering in a minute.
Posts: 16449
Threads: 127
Joined: July 10, 2013
Reputation:
65
RE: cute
October 9, 2019 at 4:50 pm
(October 9, 2019 at 4:17 pm)Cod Wrote: (October 9, 2019 at 5:42 am)BrianSoddingBoru4 Wrote: You ruined it because 'Club sandwich' is the punchline. Traditionally, this is where jokes are meant to stop. It's actually a pretty good joke, you just told it badly.
Boru
You'll have him blubbering in a minute.
Well, ya know, you have to overexplain everything - especially jokes and pop culture references.
Posts: 46102
Threads: 538
Joined: July 24, 2013
Reputation:
109
RE: cute
October 9, 2019 at 5:29 pm
This littlun's also off the cute meter:
Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
Posts: 2435
Threads: 21
Joined: May 5, 2017
Reputation:
26
RE: cute
October 9, 2019 at 5:35 pm
A duck walks into a bar and asks for a pint of Guinness and the landlord says 'wow a talking duck you could make a fortune in the circus'.
A circus, isn't that a big round thing made of sail cloth and sawdust on the floor?
Yes that's correct.
Then why the fuck would they need a plasterer?
It's amazing 'science' always seems to 'find' whatever it is funded for, and never the oppsite. Drich.
|