Murphy’s Laws

[Anomalocaris]

You actually think the lemming myth is true?

That they kill themselves?

It's true.

I used to work on a suicide helpline and we'd get calls from lemmings all the time.

Yes, your dedication to helping those looking to commit suicide is legendary.

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Lemmings DO commit suicide, but only when they're bulldozed off a cliff by the Disney Corporation.

Boru

But they earn union scale....

So bulldozing them off a cliff is clearly a moral and intelligent cost saving measure...

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"Some assembly required" never factors in the swearing and throwing of tools as part of the workload.

True with bikes and patients.

I heard that, unlike the designer of bikes, the stupid designer Of patients made no provision for ease of assembly , because all the parts can go on the wrong way, or upside down, Or cross threaded.

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Interchangeable parts won’t.

Boru

No parts won’t interchange with sufficiently vigorous installation, just ask Beccs.

[Gawdzilla Sama]

Go ahead and say "There's nothing to worry about" out loud, I dare you!

There is nothing about which worry will do any good,  except you are biologically impelled to worry about everything anyway.

A healthy dose of paranoia is always handy.

[BrianSoddingBoru4]

There is nothing about which worry will do any good,  except you are biologically impelled to worry about everything anyway.

A healthy dose of paranoia is always handy.

Just because you’re NOT paranoid doesn’t mean people AREN’T out to get you.

Boru

[Anomalocaris]

There is nothing about which worry will do any good,  except you are biologically impelled to worry about everything anyway.

A healthy dose of paranoia is always handy.

If you don’t think paranoia is healthy then you are not paranoid enough. But if your think your paranoia is of a healthy degree then clearly you are still not paranoid enough.

[BrianSoddingBoru4]

A healthy dose of paranoia is always handy.

If you don’t think paranoia is healthy then you are not paranoid enough. But if your think your paranoia is of a healthy degree then clearly you are still not paranoid enough.

I’ve always considered myself something of a reverse paranoiac - I suspect people of conspiring to make me happy.

Boru

[Sal]

Paranoid narcissism: the grandiose and malignant self-worshiping belief that people secretly want to be you.

[polymath257]

The paranoids are after me!

[A. Secular Human]

The odds of visitors arriving is equal to the need for leaving.

Nobody ever "told you so" until long after they should have told you so.

Whatever you're looking for is in the place you would have looked next if you hadn't given up.

As a corollary to the last point above:

"You always find lost objects the last place you look."

That's why I always go there *first*.

[Gawdzilla Sama]

The odds of visitors arriving is equal to the need for leaving.

Nobody ever "told you so" until long after they should have told you so.

Whatever you're looking for is in the place you would have looked next if you hadn't given up.

As a corollary to the last point above:

"You always find lost objects the last place you look."

That's why I always go there *first*.

If you find it, why would you keep looking?

[Anomalocaris]

The paranoids are after me!

How do you know that ain’t true?