Our server costs ~$56 per month to run. Please consider donating or becoming a Patron to help keep the site running. Help us gain new members by following us on Twitter and liking our page on Facebook!
Current time: November 1, 2026, 3:42 am
Atheist Forums › Discussion › Humor v
The Perfect Murder

Thread Rating:
  • 0 Vote(s) - 0 Average
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
The Perfect Murder
thesummerqueen Offline
I Make Sarcasm Look Good
*****
Religious Views: Bagels
Posts: 12586
Threads: 397
Joined: September 17, 2010
Reputation: 96
#1
The Perfect Murder
October 5, 2011 at 4:31 pm
[Image: Untitled2_zpswaosccbr.png]
Find
Reply
frankiej Offline
Wiggin' Specialist
****
Religious Views: Haruhiism
Posts: 5652
Threads: 133
Joined: May 10, 2011
Reputation: 69
#2
RE: The Perfect Murder
October 5, 2011 at 4:48 pm
I couldn't even bring myself to laugh... It is utterly bizarre.

Something you would only see on tv.
Cunt
Find
Reply
Cinjin Offline Donators
Member of the Decade
*****
Religious Views: Enlightened
Posts: 7031
Threads: 250
Joined: March 4, 2011
Reputation: 78
#3
RE: The Perfect Murder
October 5, 2011 at 9:18 pm
Guy's a genius!

Similar to my awesome plan: I'm going to buy a round trip plane ticket to Florida. While there, I am going to break into Sea World at night and proceed to locate their shark tanks. I will cut my finger as I'm climbing into the tank so as to bait a shark into attacking me. I will then kill the shark with my authentic Rambo III knife I got off of the QVC home shopping network. Once I have skinned the shark and removed all it's guts, I will of course head home with the shark skin in my garment bag. I won't even have to order food on the flight home as I will of course, have fresh shark meat to eat from the fish fry I had the night before out in the hotel parking lot. Once I have arrived at home I will tell my ex-girlfriend how awesome snorkeling is for the next few months. Once I have convinced her to take a trip to the Caribbean, my plan will be nearing completion. After I have obtained plane tickets to wherever she decides to go, I will charter a boat and follow HER boat out into the ocean to await her first snorkeling dive. I will then don my shark suit and of course my razor sharp shark teeth and swim up to her completely undetected. I will then be able to attack her without anyone ever knowing that I was even there. No plan could ever be more flawless! It's perfect!



Don't tell anybody ...... or I'll shark attack you!
Find
Reply
MilesTailsPrower Offline
Member
***
Religious Views: Atheist
Posts: 1054
Threads: 37
Joined: June 20, 2011
Reputation: 21
#4
RE: The Perfect Murder
October 6, 2011 at 12:23 am (This post was last modified: October 6, 2011 at 12:24 am by MilesTailsPrower.)
Why go through all the trouble killing an animal and skinning it?

It's October DAMNIT! Just buy a costume!

Why not go SAW on your ex's ass, and attack her with a wild bore mask on?

[Image: scan0014.jpg]
How about we just kill our neighbor and jump into his skin and then kill her?
[Image: 4rynft.jpg]

Religion is like a Penis, you shouldn't whip it out in public and you shouldn't shove it down your child's throat.
[Image: ao1i8o.png]
Find
Reply
Oldandeasilyconfused Offline
Senior Member
****
Religious Views: Agnostic Atheist
Posts: 7388
Threads: 168
Joined: February 25, 2009
Reputation: 45
#5
RE: The Perfect Murder
October 6, 2011 at 2:07 am (This post was last modified: October 6, 2011 at 2:18 am by Oldandeasilyconfused.)
Find
Reply
downbeatplumb Offline
Posting Freak
*****
Religious Views: What is a God anyway?
Posts: 13900
Threads: 263
Joined: January 11, 2009
Reputation: 82
#6
RE: The Perfect Murder
October 6, 2011 at 5:23 am



You can fix ignorance, you can't fix stupid.

Tinkety Tonk and down with the Nazis.




 








Find
Reply


Atheist Forums › Discussion › Humor v
The Perfect Murder

Possibly Related Threads…
Thread Author Replies Views Last Post
  This SNL skit is just too perfect Apollo 6 1953 December 16, 2020 at 11:14 am
Last Post: Apollo
  The Secret to a Perfect Body pocaracas 4 2037 July 1, 2014 at 8:50 am
Last Post: KichigaiNeko
  Recipe for perfect coleslaw Cyberman 32 15049 August 29, 2012 at 5:38 pm
Last Post: Cyberman



Users browsing this thread: 1 Guest(s)