Rape

[Bob Kelso]

Ah, yes... the touchiest of subjects, and understandably so. That being said I'd like to address the following rising post trends that I've seen on Facebook, and other social media;

---

---

These irritate me to no end for multiple reasons.

First and foremost, rape is not contained to a male perpetrator-female victim paradigm. I think most rational people are aware of this, yet I see it ignored time and time again.

Secondly, the entire concept of "Teach 'Don't Rape' not 'Don't Get Raped'" is entirely ridiculous for two reasons:

1. Why not teach both? Teach both genders about consent, and situation avoidance/handling.

I hear a lot of idealistic horseshit over the latter part of point one, that situation avoidance/handling shouldn't be necessary at all. Yeah, sure, in an ideal world no one would rape/murder/victimize anyone... but that's not the fucking world we live in goddammit. Ignoring reality with your fingers in you ears screaming "Neither my descendants or I should have to deal with this" solves nothing.

2. Since when has teaching determined criminals not to do something worked?

I'll grant a small concession to point two on the grounds that teaching people who don't know any better can lead to reform or prevention... But wagging the proverbial finger at a psychopath who enjoys rape or murder and telling him it's wrong doesn't solve anything, whereas teaching people to avoid certain situations could help.

---

That's my two cents on this little tidbit about rape, I'd like to hear yours even if it's to tell me I'm wrong and to fuck off.

Cheers.

[Whateverist]

Yeah. The naivitae is galling.

The closest I've come to that sort of mindset was from my professor for a women's study class. It was a film based class. After one particularly gory movie, she made the comment that she didn't see why power wasn't given to women .. "surely they could do no worse than men".

I was forced to point out that if power was the sort of thing that was handed out based on merit, there were also better men for the job. Of course, power isn't dished out that way. It is seized by those ruthless enough to do whatever it takes to get it.

[Zidneya]

I totally agree with you. Let's not forget that the rapist mind is (not exactly, however metaphorically speaking resumed into a simple words) like this:

• I want sex.
  
• Sex feels good.
  
• Therefore you are gonna enjoy it.
  
• And if you don't who cares.
  
• You are not a person you are here for my pleasure.
  
• I find you hot.
  
• Therefore you must want sex.
  
• And it's your fault for being hot not mine.
  
• You don't want me?
  
• Then I'm gonna f**k you so hard that you are gonna respect me, love me and fear me.
  

Rape doesn't happen because it isn't teached well. It happens because people think like animals and they believe that below their waists they have a magic trick that it's gonna make them and everyone else feel better.

I still remember in colleague when one of my teachers was angry because another teacher left a mess in their classrooms and he said:

That damn bitch I'm gonna fuck her so she knows who I am.

That it's one of the reasons why I hate Islam and other ways of thinking that it's the woman responsibility to be demure. Because if she isn't demure it's her fault for being assaulted.

Because the typical rapist argument is: She provoked me.
An idea that is promoted today as well by all the dicks: Sure you didn't provoked him?

And WHAT I HATE THE MOST ARE THE WOMEN THAT TO GET WHAT THEY WANT THEY LIE CLAIMING THEY WERE RAPED. For me they are the worst.

---

---

And I'm not a fan of the whole: "To many sexual partners in man good, to many sexual partners in woman bad" as well.

Bottom line is.

Rape is act that is only perpetrated by pieces of shit.

[LastPoet]

In my experience, topics about rape can get heated. Please people, stay nice.

[Esquilax]

1. Why not teach both? Teach both genders about consent, and situation avoidance/handling.

Here's the issue: this whole concept is a lot more knotty than you'd think.

Just to begin with, all this talk of teaching prevention and risk reduction is just a bandage over a bullet wound anyway, since it's next to impossible to pick who's going to do what, anyway. Sure, you can teach people not to go into dark alleys or accept drinks from strangers, and that's sensible enough advice, but most rapes aren't committed by strangers in dark alleys, that's just a popular stereotype. A lot of rapes occur with someone known to the victim, so what then? You're just gonna teach us all to be on guard around everyone we know, forever? Real life just doesn't function in a way in which victim preparedness will ever be enough.

And mostly, victim preparedness is all that's ever taught, when it comes to rape. For all the advancements we've made on this subject, rape is still a curiously socially acceptable crime; it's one of the few where the victim can be said to be "inviting" the crime via the way they dress or act, where the perpetrator can be excused because of any number of things... we live in a culture where sexual dominance over women is seen as a positive, manly trait, and this is the underbelly of that. This is something that needs to be addressed, but for the most part, where the issue isn't simply being ignored, all we seem to get are these preventative measures that just lay yet more of the onus of responsibility for the crime on the victim.

[Bob Kelso]

Here's the issue: this whole concept is a lot more knotty than you'd think.

Just to begin with, all this talk of teaching prevention and risk reduction is just a bandage over a bullet wound anyway, since it's next to impossible to pick who's going to do what, anyway. Sure, you can teach people not to go into dark alleys or accept drinks from strangers, and that's sensible enough advice, but most rapes aren't committed by strangers in dark alleys, that's just a popular stereotype. A lot of rapes occur with someone known to the victim, so what then? You're just gonna teach us all to be on guard around everyone we know, forever? Real life just doesn't function in a way in which victim preparedness will ever be enough.

And mostly, victim preparedness is all that's ever taught, when it comes to rape. For all the advancements we've made on this subject, rape is still a curiously socially acceptable crime; it's one of the few where the victim can be said to be "inviting" the crime via the way they dress or act, where the perpetrator can be excused because of any number of things... we live in a culture where sexual dominance over women is seen as a positive, manly trait, and this is the underbelly of that. This is something that needs to be addressed, but for the most part, where the issue isn't simply being ignored, all we seem to get are these preventative measures that just lay yet more of the onus of responsibility for the crime on the victim.

Oh I agree wholeheartedly with all of this. In no way do I find preventative measures to be a solution, I'm not sure that there is one to be found but I tend to be pessimistic when it comes to human criminality. I'm just saying that the rising trend of demonizing preventative talks is incredibly unhelpful and annoying.

[Bad Wolf]

Rape won't ever go away, bad people do bad things. I also hate those stupid signs telling us to teach men not to rape. We teach everyone not to steal or murder but those still happen. Just like with getting burgled and getting in a car accident, you can take all the precautions possible to prevent rape but it could still happen.

[KUSA]

This is what the rapest should see.

[John V]

2. Since when has teaching determined criminals not to do something worked?

I'll grant a small concession to point two on the grounds that teaching people who don't know any better can lead to reform or prevention... But wagging the proverbial finger at a psychopath who enjoys rape or murder and telling him it's wrong doesn't solve anything, whereas teaching people to avoid certain situations could help.

I think your "small concession" may be bigger than you think. IOW, rape isn't just done by "determined criminals." A lot of rape results from the incorrect idea that a drunk woman can give consent. A campaign in Canada a few years ago to combat that notion was followed by a 10% decrease in reported sexual assaults.

[Napoléon]

I think rape on the whole probably doesn't happen how most people imagine it. Like Esq mentioned, most of the time rape happens by people who already know each other. Not some guy lurking down a street alley. It's not as black and white like that.

I imagine most rapes happen as a result of people being too drunk to know what they're actually doing. There was an ad campaign in the UK aimed at teenagers about this very thing:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5gEftWCG5Ow