How's Everyone Feeling Right Meow?

[GUBU]

Massive headache, yuuuughe. I mean, one as big as Trump's dick, if he had one, that is.

[Edwardo Piet]

Feeling happy and cared about. Feeling like I had a great time spent with my brother. Feeling like my interview at the jobcenter went incredibly well and feeling like I'm extremely lucky to have such a lovely and caring financial advisor.

Missing friends a lot but feeling absolutely wonderful whenever I get a Skype message or PM from any of them. My face absolutely lights up.

[Jello]

Nervouuuuuuuus!

[Losty]

Nervouuuuuuuus!

Yyyyy?

[Jello]

Nervouuuuuuuus!

Yyyyy?

Cute girl talking to me   

[Thumpalumpacus]

Utterly convinced that a vast number of individuals who would consider themselves "decent" people are actually pure shit/human garbage. This isn't a recent revelation; I've know it for many, many, years. It just happens to be my lead thought, at the moment.

One of the first things I had to come to grips with in my recovery was self-honesty. I think most of us think, "I'm me, therefore I'm good," and that clouds our ability to assess our behavior objectively. We all want to think we're good people, but rather than looking at our behavior to see if that's the case, we seem to use "I'm me, therefore I'm good" as an axiom -- a starting point or filter through which we look at ourselves.

At least, that was the case with me, for far too long.

[Losty]

I had a phone call with my therapist yesterday and she said something interesting to me "feeling like you're losing it when your life is a mess is normal, Stephanie. Feeling emotionally unstable when things seem to be falling apart is completely sane."

Ok so...at the very least, I am not insane. Somehow doesn't seem all that comforting but it did help a little. Even more help was just pouring all my stress onto her. Sometimes I cling to my own misery for some reason but once I let it out that helps a lot. Now to pack all this emotional baggage back into my brain...shit is always falling out when I open up to her.

[Thumpalumpacus]

I had a phone call with my therapist yesterday and she said something interesting to me "feeling like you're losing it when your life is a mess is normal, Stephanie. Feeling emotionally unstable when things seem to be falling apart is completely sane."

Ok so...at the very least, I am not insane. Somehow doesn't seem all that comforting but it did help a little. Even more help was just pouring all my stress onto her. Sometimes I cling to my own misery for some reason but once I let it out that helps a lot. Now to pack all this emotional baggage back into my brain...shit is always falling out when I open up to her.

If I may offer some unsolicited advice -- don't pack it back into your brain, you may as well be fermenting grapes into wine. Let go what you can ... watch those emotions, observe their peculiar behavior, but let them be themselves, and you be yourself, separate.

[Losty]

I had a phone call with my therapist yesterday and she said something interesting to me "feeling like you're losing it when your life is a mess is normal, Stephanie. Feeling emotionally unstable when things seem to be falling apart is completely sane."

Ok so...at the very least, I am not insane. Somehow doesn't seem all that comforting but it did help a little. Even more help was just pouring all my stress onto her. Sometimes I cling to my own misery for some reason but once I let it out that helps a lot. Now to pack all this emotional baggage back into my brain...shit is always falling out when I open up to her.

If I may offer some unsolicited advice -- don't pack it back into your brain, you may as well be fermenting grapes into wine. Let go what you can ... watch those emotions, observe their peculiar behavior, but let them be themselves, and you be yourself, separate.

I wish it was so easy. I just have a lot of shit in my head. I usually try to block out all intense emotions to protect myself from that stuff. Letting it go is more of piece by piece thing. If I let all the stuff out at once I don't think my sanity would survive.

[Thumpalumpacus]

I know it's easier said than done, but there are methods by which one can let go -- not let out, let go -- of these feelings.

Not trying to badger you and I'm sorry if it feels like I am, sweetie. Just wanting to help and this is what has worked for me.