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[Serious] comforting the dying
#21
RE: comforting the dying
(September 21, 2023 at 2:58 pm)ColeDavis Wrote:
(September 21, 2023 at 2:50 pm)pocaracas Wrote: *vent time*
I don't need to tell you the precise circumstances; everybody else realised that this was about general principles about the situation. If all you've got is other people's idea of humour, I don't think you have much to contribute.

Also, you were told, twice, that this was serious, but oh no, this wasn't good enough for you.
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#22
RE: comforting the dying
Yeah... General principles. Go on and write your essay based on general principles. Good luck getting a C.
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#23
RE: comforting the dying
Administrator Notice
Serious tag - do I need to explain?
  
“If you are the smartest person in the room, then you are in the wrong room.” — Confucius
                                      
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#24
RE: comforting the dying
Poca, seriously, lane out.

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#25
RE: comforting the dying
Quite the derailment.

OP - Angrboda has the best advice here.
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#26
RE: comforting the dying
(September 25, 2023 at 2:23 pm)Nanny Wrote: Quite the derailment.

OP - Angrboda has the best advice here.

I'm inclined to agree.
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#27
RE: comforting the dying
When my boat team arrived in the sunny south out east of Asia I was shanghaied by our corpsman who saw me reading scifi and said "I want you, you can read!" Says something about the rest of our team. Hmph Anyway he gave me a stack of manual on first aid and I ate them. Over the next 2.something years I "held hands" about a dozen times. Both our crews and the people we picked up from their romps in the jungle. Never easy. Sometimes I'd hold a hand and write notes to be sent along later with the other hand. Never easy.
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#28
RE: comforting the dying
(September 20, 2023 at 8:19 am)pocaracas Wrote: Try to make something up




I'd say this is how a lot of our current messes started.

Nothing is gained in a lie, No matter how well meaning.

I can only echo others here, Presence and comfort.
"For the only way to eternal glory is a life lived in service of our Lord, FSM; Verily it is FSM who is the perfect being the name higher than all names, king of all kings and will bestow upon us all, one day, The great reclaiming"  -The Prophet Boiardi-

      Conservative trigger warning.
[Image: s-l640.jpg]
                                                                                         
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#29
RE: comforting the dying
As was said above, just be there. Your presence is far more important than you may know. It's not about what you say.
There my be "hospice resources" (a nurse or palliative care physician), who might talk for a few minutes (to you), but it seems you get this.
Best wishes ... you're a good friend. They might like CDs or music of a certain type to listen to when they don't have company, they may want smoothies/milkshakes, if they're eating at all,
if they're not comfortable, ask about a better med regime. They might want to have you read them a certain book or watch a favorite movie ?
Again, ... you're a very good friend.
Every religion is true one way or another. It is true when understood metaphorically. But when it gets stuck in its own metaphors, interpreting them as facts, then you are in trouble. - Joseph Campbell  Popcorn

Militant Atheist Commie Evolutionist 
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#30
RE: comforting the dying
(September 21, 2023 at 2:50 pm)pocaracas Wrote:
(September 21, 2023 at 10:14 am)ColeDavis Wrote: You sent me a 'humorous' video and told me to 'make things up'.

That's how some of us comfort others... with humour.
What's the use of spending the rest of your days all gloomy? Might as well try to have some fun.

As an advice, show your friend that movie and hear him/her/them have a laugh. Relate it to the current situation ... I don't know... talk about it. And then, if they like it, watch other Ricky Gervais films.
One other thing that is often on older people's minds is what they regret doing/not doing in their lives... maybe it's not a bad idea to just go there and suggest you two do something that was never done... if possible.

*vent time*
Sheesh. You come here with barely any details and expect random internet people to give you insight into how to deal with a random person who has some medical condition that's terminal?
You didn't even tell us if this person is bedridden or is still fully functional and expect us to advise you... how?!?
By writing out generic platitudes? No, screw you!
Use chatGPT for that. It's well versed in ALL the generic platitudes that humanity has ever written and it will cough out everything you need with far more precision than we would.

Dear Sir or Madam,

Other people managed to offer general advice of some considerable value. If you aren't able to contribute meaningfully, then how about leaving it alone. I wouldn't dream of telling rude people like yourself about the (now deceased) person's circumstances.
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