(May 31, 2016 at 8:17 pm)mh.brewer Wrote:

(May 31, 2016 at 8:16 pm)The Valkyrie Wrote: I knew a woman who lost her virginity to lego.

Is that a nick name for an amputee?

No, she actually experimented with lego blocks.

(May 31, 2016 at 7:19 pm)CapnAwesome Wrote:

(May 31, 2016 at 6:48 pm)Catholic_Lady Wrote: Sure it is. It breaks the hymen. Any women with a broken hymen is not worthy of a good man, unless it was broken by him. Some of the more extreme Muslim cultures believe that a woman's father has the right to kill her if she loses her virginity. Obviously I think that's a little over the top, but I can't say I disagree with the principle.

In that case childbirth does 1000 times the damage of breaking a hymen, which is often done long before penetrative intercourse. Yet childbirth is somehow some miricle of life and losing your virginity makes you 'damaged goods' (women aren't goods.)

Do you feel like widows are damaged goods? If your husband died in an accident you are ineligible to date because a dick has been in you before?

They both make women damaged goods to any man except her husband, and only if her hymen was broken by his genitalia, and her vajay stretched out by his child.

(May 31, 2016 at 8:18 pm)The Valkyrie Wrote:

(May 31, 2016 at 8:17 pm)mh.brewer Wrote: Is that a nick name for an amputee?

No, she actually experimented with lego blocks.

You don't happen to remember which particular set do you? My wife's birthday is coming up.

(May 31, 2016 at 6:19 pm)Catholic_Lady Wrote: I agree with the OP somewhat.

The thing is, women who have children have obviously lost their virginity. No self respecting man wants to be with a woman who has already been penetrated by another man's genitalia.. Damaged goods, if you will.

Oh I don't know.  I'm not the sort that wants in right after another guy has lubed you, but that you ever had sex with someone else is hardly a deal breaker.  Frankly a woman with no experience and no skills is far less desirable in my book.

(May 31, 2016 at 4:35 pm)Errol Monite Wrote: There's no point.

The door hissed as the airlock in the bulkhead broke, allowing me entrance to a hidden portion of the stable. I wasn't supposed to be here. In fact, my being anywhere except the Cells three layers up without a mare was a direct violation of Stable-Tec law. I'd had enough of life in those things. They were small, claustrophobic cubes with a toilet and a bed. Food was scraps pushed underneath door by the guards. Of course, it didn't help that I was due to be "retired."

What, am I a criminal? No, I am a stallion. This meant that I have one purpose in life. That is to service the mares. These rules were set up by Stable-tec. Well, not to the extent that they are now. These laws had only been instituted within the last fifty to sixty years.

From the stallions' point of view, generations ago, there were two uprisings against the mares. Now, generation after generation of stallions were facing the consequences. This meant that they were regulated. They got the same meal three times a day, their numbers couldn't exceed a certain amount, and they couldn't go anywhere except mare's quarters when they asked.

So, how do the mare's regulate the population? I am the only stallion that actually knew the exact amount of stallions allowed at a time. Fifty. Twenty-five unicorns, twenty-five earth-ponies.

Me? I'm a unicorn. When I was young, I had a name and a Cutie Mark. It was a moon with three stars. I, like all stallions was forced into the breeding service when I was twelve.

They made a mistake with me though. I saw the stallion that I was replacing. Number twenty-six. He was strapped to a table. I still remember his screams as he writhed trying to get away. It was hopeless though.

There was a machine there, with what looked like black lips. It kissed his foreleg and in under a minute, his screams went silent. From that day on, I swore they would never put me on that table. The "Nightkiss," as I called it, was not going to be the end of me.

It's truly incredible what one can do when there's nothing for him to do. I practiced magic. I was quite good at it too. Security hated me for it though. I learned how to manipulate my pip-buck's tracker so that I appeared to be somewhere I wasn't. What a laugh it was when security would find out they were chasing ghosts all through their stable.

I got beaten for it though. Still, it was a good laugh.

Speaking of ghosts, I learned how to separate my mind from my body, this is how I learned pretty much anything academic. I would watch the maintenance mares as they worked on consoles and repaired the stable. I watched and listened for about three years. My magic was strong enough to teleport some poor mare's screwdriver into my cell. Using this and a few bobby pins I stole when I serviced some mare, I practiced lock-picking. This got me into even more trouble, as when I was caught outside of my cell, I lost food and got flogged by security.

I still did it though. I was the only stallion that they couldn't keep in the cell.

Finally, my day came. I was sixteen years old. Sixteen! Three mares opened my cell, I was confused at first. It was only ever one mare to open my cell.

"You've got twenty-four hours," they said.

"Can I ask a question?" I replied.

"No, you can't postpone," they told me.

"That's not what I was going to ask."

They shut the door without letting me finish. But, the moment the cell closed, I made my move. There was a camera in the corner of my cell. It viewed pretty much everything. It was the reason that I got into trouble so much. I did learn that there was a blind spot for the camera, directly underneath. I climbed the walls in the corner. There, in the blind spot, I countered the enchantment I made that hid my tools in a notch in the wall.

Using a screwdriver and my hoof to keep the camera from seeing what was going on, I unscrewed the glass cover. This fell away, leaving the delicate machinery exposed.

The mare that was on shift at this time in the security center was sound asleep. Two empty bottles of alcohol on her desk and one half-empty in her lap. If she had been awake, she would have seen the empty cell for a moment, then a flash of silver as the screwdriver penetrated the lens.

With that out of the way, I turned towards the air vent. It was barely big enough for my hoof to fit, but oh, did I mention I was skilled at magic? I shrank and escaped into the ducts. I knew that they checked in on the twenty-sixes every four hours while they were processing. I had that long to get to a safe place, but where to go?

I was a stallion, this meant I had no free-reign of the stable. My pip-buck had the map ability deactivated by an administrator. I swear, if I ever find out just who exactly blocked everything from my pip-buck except the notes...

Anyway, I made my way straight to maintenance. There was one mare in the room, an earth-pony. I cast a spell that made her need to relieve herself. What? It's the only thing I could think of at the time. I got to a console while she was in the bathroom and downloaded a map into my notes.

Upon examining the notes, there seemed to be hallways the just led out into nothing. They were subtle, but for a pony willing to try anything to escape detection, they were the best chance I had. Next stop, the armory.

This part was dangerous. The armory is one of the most protective places in the stable. Monitored twenty-four seven, this was no cakewalk, unless you could literally turn yourself invisible. Then, I just grabbed a pistol, some ammo and I was back into the vents before the spell wore off.

At this point, the nearest place that resembled a safe point was two floors down on the residential level. I knew this part of the stable. It's pretty much the only portion that mares took me unless somepony was throwing a party elsewhere.

I looked through a vent straight at the wall, studying it for a moment. It looked like a plain old wall, but here I was risking everything. Just as long as the Nightkiss operation is avoided, hey, I'll take a firing squad over that any day. I ghosted to make sure the hall was empty, then began removing the screws to the vents. I was invisible, but anypony that knew how could break an invisibility spell.

I froze as two voices sounded from around a corner. Sure enough two mares, both seemed to be drunk wandered down the halls. They spoke at the same time and one was muttering something about brownies, while the other was not legible and spoke with slurred speech. Neither one noticed the crooked vent. Thank Celestia.

I finished with the vent and reattached it. Finally, I bolted for the wall. Not sure what was going to happen. I braced for the impact against the steel wall. Suddenly, I found myself in a dark, dirty, dank hallway.

There were closets all along both sides, each labelled "Storage," and a console on the wall right inside the entrance. I smiled, a hidden passage. Perfect. Then I noticed the skeleton on the floor, a pistol laying next to it, and sure enough, a chunk of lead inside the skull.

I paused for a while and looked at the skeleton. Then I activated the console. All that was there was a note. I read it.

Dear Stallion,

I'm so sorry for whatever you have endured. I tried to stop the Overmare and her hoards, but she outsmarted us at every turn. As a last resort I had these passages installed in the stable. If you ever find your way here, know that it is safe. The spell on the gateway won't allow mares in. The storage rooms are equipped to last at least a decade's supplies if you ration. Maybe less if there's more than one of you. Assuming this message ever gets read, the first stallion to read this I officially dub, by order of Stable-Tec authorization 003, Overstallion of Stable 23. Again, these rooms are safe, not even security will pick up your pip-buck in here. I don't know what has happened, or what stallion life is like, but I do hope you use this place and these supplies well.

Good luck lad,

Overstallion Harvest

After reading and downloading the little note, I looked back at the skeleton for a few moments. Was this the Overstallion? I took his stable barding because I had none. Stallions weren't allowed to wear clothes. With this in mind, I put on his. Sure enough, the name tag read "M. Harvest."

Immediately I took inventory and piled everthing in the biggest room. Then, I celebrated. I had escaped the Cells, outwitted security, gotten a map...

Ah, I was free. This place wasn't up to standard, but it was mine. There was a smaller hallway that ran parallel to the main hall. A portion of this hall was only held up by a flimsy framework.

I crammed my supplies into the room just on the other side and relaxed on a two-century old pillow. I toasted a bottle of Sparkle-Cola to myself and my escape and for once I felt free and happy. Twenty-six was free at last.

(May 31, 2016 at 6:32 pm)Catholic_Lady Wrote:

(May 31, 2016 at 6:24 pm)Yeauxleaux Wrote: I think the average 21st Century person, male or female, gay or straight, is always going to prefer someone experienced over a virgin who would lie there like a plank of wood.

"Damaged goods" my arse. Anyone who is still a virgin past 18 gets shamed for it in Western culture (which I don't agree with, just saying)

First of all, I was joking.

Second, there's no need to knock on virgins or to say most people will generally prefer a non virgin over a virgin. People are more than their virginity or lack thereof. You're only a virgin until the first time you have sex. If you get in a relationship with someone who losses their virginity to you, this doesn't mean they're going to suck in bed every time until their second boyfriend or something. I lost my virginity to my husband at 24 years old, and I can assure you I do NOT "lie there like a plank of wood."

Piss, had me interested for a minute there.  


Wait.  What's that you're trolling?  Oh okay, I won't blow your cover.

I think any time a troll comes in here we should just troll them back. Taking them seriously and actually responding to them legitimately is exactly what they get off on. That's the whole reason they troll in the first place.

Best troll ever.

(May 31, 2016 at 6:17 pm)Losty Wrote: I don't think not wanting children, or even not wanting children that aren't biologically yours necessarily makes someone trash though. I think it's mature, responsible, and respectable to refuse to date women with kids if you don't want kids and/or if you don't want those particular kids. The real trash are people who date single parents and treat their kids like garbage and the parents so desperate for a BF/GF that they let it happen.

Very well said.

(May 31, 2016 at 8:28 pm)Catholic_Lady Wrote: I think any time a troll comes in here we should just troll them back. Taking them seriously and actually responding to them legitimately is exactly what they get off on. That's the whole reason they troll in the first place.

I've been doing my part