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(January 8, 2013 at 10:05 pm)Violet Lilly Blossom Wrote:
(January 8, 2013 at 9:58 pm)TaraJo Wrote: You just answered your own question, buddy. I never wanted to be a man, even though I have a penis.
Anyway, there's more than one transsexual here.
There you are, girly... I was starting to wonder if you were going to leave me all alone in here... >_<
Don't take anything he says seriously though
Heh. Sorry. Got my Xbox replaced for Christmas and as a result I haven't been paying as much attention to the forum.
Still, it's hard to tell he difference between an asshole of an ideologue, someone who genuinely doesn't know better or a plain ol' troll. I'm going to assume that he just doesn't know better, but I have a feeling that's only because I haven't really read the rest of the thread here. Should I?
"If you cling to something as the absolute truth and you are caught in it, when the truth comes in person to knock on your door you will refuse to let it in." ~ Siddhartha Gautama
(January 8, 2013 at 10:07 pm)TaraJo Wrote: Heh. Sorry. Got my Xbox replaced for Christmas and as a result I haven't been paying as much attention to the forum.
It's okie... but I missed you
Quote:Still, it's hard to tell the difference between an asshole of an ideologue, someone who genuinely doesn't know better or a plain ol' troll. I'm going to assume that he just doesn't know better, but I have a feeling that's only because I haven't really read the rest of the thread here. Should I?
Oh no, this thread is golden if you've got some thick skin. Do eet!
But no, it's a troll :3 It's okay though, since apparently he hasn't been banned 0.o
EDIT: Ok, yeah, I'm reading and the guy's an asshole. He knows nothing bu thinks he knows everything (reminds me of Rush Limbaugh).
Here's the story I went with. I spent most my life trying to be the man everyone expected me to be. Thing was, from my teen years on, I knew there was something wrong, I knew I didn't fit in, but there was always something just outside my grasp that I couldn't quite 'get.' As a result, I spent middle and high school as a loner. Not just a loner, but an angry, aggressive loner and that made me dangerous.
After I got out of school and got my own place, I thought maybe I was gay. I found a local GLBT center and tried to put myself in the gay community. I even dated a guy for a while. Know what? A much as I felt more comfortable in queer-world, dating guys as a guy just felt wrong. Here's a pic of me from back then:
Didn't take, though, so I tried to integrate myself with mainstream society as me as a regular ol' guy. Put me in the same situation I was in as a teen, though: an angry loner. I couldn't manage to keep a job for longer than a few months and I could never seem to make friends very well. I had romantic relationships here and there, and tried to derive some happiness from the idea of the good ol' American family. Problem was, even my ex wife knew there was something 'different' about me and our relationship didn't work.
A couple of years after that relationship soured up, I read an article that told me what effect estrogen can have on a male body. That's what got my full attention. I was still depressed and strongly considering suicide and just one thing stopped me: I wanted to be a girl, I knew how to do it and I wanted to do it before I died. So, I made a few phone calls and got myself going and things finally started to change.
When I started finding a transsexual community out there, I finally found a group where I could really feel like I fit in. I had never felt that before in my life. They helped me and guided me and provided support as I needed it. It was actually a stark contrast from what the rest of society did to me. Upon starting on estrogen, the most wonderful thing happened: I felt happy. I mean, I had never felt this kind of pure happiness before; the kind that comes from inside yourself. It's amazing! It made the rest of the world easier to deal with..... and I needed that emotional shift, because the rest of the world suddenly turned much more hostile when I came out.
I used to be able to find jobs with ease, generally within a week or two I could at least get a fast food job. Suddenly, even McDonalds didn't want to touch me. My parents had always stood with me no matter how scary I got; now they suddenly wanted to have nothing to do with me. Me ex always told me she wanted to make sure I stayed in the children's lives was suddenly taking steps to prevent me from seeing them. Even homeless shelters became unmanageable in that sleeping in a poorly supervised room filled with unstable men was scary (and finding any other social assistance, either from the private or public sector, is often depndant on staying at a homeless shelter).
And you know what? In spite of these difficulties, no matter what else I have to go through, I wouldn't dream of going back. Now I'm a student who's probably going to be starting a nursing program soon, I have an amazing relationship with the most wonderful person, I've found a community that has been able to help me and provide support (both emotional and financial) to the point that I can mostly take care of myself. In short, I have more stability than I ever have in my life and I never would have been able to get this stability had I not transitioned. My only regret is that I didn't get started sooner as I might have been able to avoid some of the problems that I'm still struggling with.
So if someone tells me I would be better off as I was before, I always kinda laugh inside. Because if they really knew who I was before, if they understood just how angry and violent I was, they wouldn't dream of telling me to go back to being 'him.' If OP here is genuinely scared of violence against him, detransition would be the last thing he would want out of me.
"If you cling to something as the absolute truth and you are caught in it, when the truth comes in person to knock on your door you will refuse to let it in." ~ Siddhartha Gautama
So is that the code for the procedure now? Don't feel bad, my co-workers go through these types of jokes with me every single day.
Waitress "I need a muffin"
Me, "Is that what they are calling it now?"
Heh. No. Surgery is a very long way off for me financially. I went on a trip to Philadelphia last summer. When we came back, my XBox 360 and most the games were stolen. My boyfriend replaced it for a Christmas present. Now, once I have a little cash I just want to replace some of my games; as it is now, the only ones they left were Assassin's Creed 1 and 2, Blue Dragon and Plants vs Zombies.
"If you cling to something as the absolute truth and you are caught in it, when the truth comes in person to knock on your door you will refuse to let it in." ~ Siddhartha Gautama
(January 8, 2013 at 10:43 pm)Brian37 Wrote: So is that the code for the procedure now? Don't feel bad, my co-workers go through these types of jokes with me every single day.
Waitress "I need a muffin"
Me, "Is that what they are calling it now?"
Heh. No. Surgery is a very long way off for me financially. I went on a trip to Philadelphia last summer. When we came back, my XBox 360 and most the games were stolen. My boyfriend replaced it for a Christmas present. Now, once I have a little cash I just want to replace some of my games; as it is now, the only ones they left were Assassin's Creed 1 and 2, Blue Dragon and Plants vs Zombies.
I hope that didn't go your head. Just so you know. I love turning innocent conversations into an innuendo. Just ignore me like my co-workers and you'll be fine.
January 9, 2013 at 7:34 am (This post was last modified: January 9, 2013 at 7:40 am by Aractus.)
(January 8, 2013 at 12:45 pm)Violet Lilly Blossom Wrote: It's true, but I have seen it argued before that unless a transgendered person can reproduce as desired after surgery: they will not consider them as their proper gender.
It's bigoted, it's stupid, it is definitely inaccurate, but I've seen it argued. By my parents, no less... sigh. However, it does remain true that we cannot yet change the DNA of a person in this manner (which would be to change that XX to XY, or XY to XX), and despite the lack of major physical changes associated with changing sex... it remains the only way to do it.
If it were possible today, and free, I'm not even sure I'd go for it. Because that's very dangerous.
You should be careful when using words such as "bigoted". You are the one who has decided that you wanted to change something about yourself, and then are expecting other people to accept that change. Most people don't hold such an extreme view that "your gender identity is your choice and reflects your true gender", and would be mortified if they saw men in women's change rooms and vice versa. You can't expect people to see things your way, especially if your way is at odds with social norms.
There are differing views in the medical profession on this. Those views that are not reflective of your own are not necessarily bigoted, especially as they may approach the matter in a more similar way to dissociative identity disorder, where many now feel the best course of action is to directly address the person's self identity, and attempt to rebuild it.
Quote:DNA doesn't decide your gender, chemicals of your mothers manage that while you're developing. If estrogen starts slowing in her system after the baby begins forming as a girl... the child has a chance of being a transman. If estrogen skyrockets while a baby boy is forming... the child has a chance of being a transwoman. Not causation, but it does correlate.
But DNA *is* what defines sex. And so, no... that isn't inaccurate Sex and gender may correlate, but you can be a man in a woman's body, a woman in a man's body, or anything in between. It is definitely true that sex and gender can be mismatched.
No, DNA isn't what defines sex. It is influential in determining it, it is not what defines it. Ask any biologist, and they'll tell you that the biological sex of an organism is determined by its physical characteristics (but not necessarily its capabilities).
Oh and "gender" = "sex". You have a loose definition that fits your world-view, and it's fine for you to have that, but you can't expect the rest of us to share it I'm afraid. That doesn't make us bigots, anymore than accepting evolution makes someone "anti-Xian". You're basically using the word "gender" in place of "gender identity". I'm not trying to cause any ripples on this subject, so carry on.
(January 8, 2013 at 1:02 pm)Violet Lilly Blossom Wrote:
Because me and my sister were playing with barbies when I was 5, and there were a bunch of female barbies, and one Ken doll. And I took his little plastic sword and symbolically lopped his penis off, and then broke a pretty dress by fitting it around him. Then mom came and and got pissed off at us (most of the barbies were naked, we hadn't gotten to dressing them up yet...)
EDIT: Ok, yeah, I'm reading and the guy's an asshole. He knows nothing bu thinks he knows everything (reminds me of Rush Limbaugh).
Here's the story I went with. I spent most my life trying to be the man everyone expected me to be. Thing was, from my teen years on, I knew there was something wrong, I knew I didn't fit in, but there was always something just outside my grasp that I couldn't quite 'get.' As a result, I spent middle and high school as a loner. Not just a loner, but an angry, aggressive loner and that made me dangerous.
After I got out of school and got my own place, I thought maybe I was gay. I found a local GLBT center and tried to put myself in the gay community. I even dated a guy for a while. Know what? A much as I felt more comfortable in queer-world, dating guys as a guy just felt wrong. Here's a pic of me from back then:
Didn't take, though, so I tried to integrate myself with mainstream society as me as a regular ol' guy. Put me in the same situation I was in as a teen, though: an angry loner. I couldn't manage to keep a job for longer than a few months and I could never seem to make friends very well. I had romantic relationships here and there, and tried to derive some happiness from the idea of the good ol' American family. Problem was, even my ex wife knew there was something 'different' about me and our relationship didn't work.
A couple of years after that relationship soured up, I read an article that told me what effect estrogen can have on a male body. That's what got my full attention. I was still depressed and strongly considering suicide and just one thing stopped me: I wanted to be a girl, I knew how to do it and I wanted to do it before I died. So, I made a few phone calls and got myself going and things finally started to change.
When I started finding a transsexual community out there, I finally found a group where I could really feel like I fit in. I had never felt that before in my life. They helped me and guided me and provided support as I needed it. It was actually a stark contrast from what the rest of society did to me. Upon starting on estrogen, the most wonderful thing happened: I felt happy. I mean, I had never felt this kind of pure happiness before; the kind that comes from inside yourself. It's amazing! It made the rest of the world easier to deal with..... and I needed that emotional shift, because the rest of the world suddenly turned much more hostile when I came out.
I used to be able to find jobs with ease, generally within a week or two I could at least get a fast food job. Suddenly, even McDonalds didn't want to touch me. My parents had always stood with me no matter how scary I got; now they suddenly wanted to have nothing to do with me. Me ex always told me she wanted to make sure I stayed in the children's lives was suddenly taking steps to prevent me from seeing them. Even homeless shelters became unmanageable in that sleeping in a poorly supervised room filled with unstable men was scary (and finding any other social assistance, either from the private or public sector, is often depndant on staying at a homeless shelter).
And you know what? In spite of these difficulties, no matter what else I have to go through, I wouldn't dream of going back. Now I'm a student who's probably going to be starting a nursing program soon, I have an amazing relationship with the most wonderful person, I've found a community that has been able to help me and provide support (both emotional and financial) to the point that I can mostly take care of myself. In short, I have more stability than I ever have in my life and I never would have been able to get this stability had I not transitioned. My only regret is that I didn't get started sooner as I might have been able to avoid some of the problems that I'm still struggling with.
So if someone tells me I would be better off as I was before, I always kinda laugh inside. Because if they really knew who I was before, if they understood just how angry and violent I was, they wouldn't dream of telling me to go back to being 'him.' If OP here is genuinely scared of violence against him, detransition would be the last thing he would want out of me.
People can be so ignorant and cruel. Glad you are happy now. Do you know of a hospital or private practitioner you can get a job with after school? Maybe you could work as a nurse for one of the doctors who deals with transgender?
January 9, 2013 at 8:11 am (This post was last modified: January 9, 2013 at 8:14 am by Aractus.)
(January 8, 2013 at 3:40 pm)BGChuckLee Wrote: To tell the truth, I don't really have any friends I meet up with. On the flipside, haven't gotten in any physical confrontations either
No fucking shit you don't have any friends!
(January 8, 2013 at 3:48 pm)BGChuckLee Wrote: Ummm.. it's quite easy for me at least- I am pretty good at spotting what emotions people are trying to hide. It's subtle, but you can tell who's thinking what if you have a keen eye. (Professional poker for example.)
You are so dumb. Were you dropped on your head as a child, repeatedly?
![[Image: Before.jpg]](https://images.weserv.nl/?url=i515.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Ft360%2Frizzatto%2FBefore.jpg)
