I remember back in high school, when everyone was concerned with conforming and being accepted. Interestingly, I've noticed this same behavior where I work, in occasional social settings, and online. So, I decided to do a little research, and apparently...''herd mentality'' is a survival tactic and a rather 'natural' human behavior. This author of this article suggested that as humans, we wish to be accepted by our peers, our communities, and our co-workers. Okay, I get that. But, suppose the herd is a bunch of douche bags? Suppose the herd is full of bullies, and people who, if you dissent from the herd, will berate or shun you? So, a person should merely go along with the herd, for survival? To be liked? To be accepted?

I'm not a herd follower. It is a quality that I cannot stand in adults. Children, ok. They're children. But when I see this behavior displayed amongst adults, I feel like I'm watching a bad comedian bomb over and over again. I just cringe. Now, there's nothing wrong with agreeing with the herd, if you genuinely agree with the herd. But, if you don't, and you are merely kissing asses as to be accepted...what are you really gaining? Fake friends? A phony network of people who enjoy you kissing their asses?

Equally interesting, I read an article last year about bullying, and how the psychology behind people who are groupies of the bullies, really don't like the bullies at all, as might be perceived from an outsider. Rather, people don't want to ever become the target of the bullies, so they befriend them. It's pretty interesting. I'd rather live on a deserted island, not compromising my values or ideas, if the only other option was to be in a community filled with people who expect me to agree with them, or be shunned.

So, I'm curious...do you ever see this behavior displayed in your everyday life? Do you feel that there are areas in your life, whereby you feel expected or almost compelled, to go along with the herd?

I'm hoping we can have a meaningful discussion about it.

(October 8, 2014 at 6:11 pm)Deidre32 Wrote: So, I'm curious...do you ever see this behavior displayed in your everyday life?

Yes. Collective ego structures are not hidden. Race, gender, politics, team sports... Just about every 'group' serves a form of collective ego. Examples such as: 'women's' rights; we 'men' must be strong; we 'blacks' must unite, 'our' country, and 'our' team. Just about everyone, is at most times, unconsciously participating in a 'herd mentality' via a collective ego structure.

ETA: I, as a male who stays home and tends to the household while my wife wins the bread, have taken an obvious step outside of the 'herd' of men, and indeed much of society's mentality that regards men as the primary breadwinners.

I'll follow the herd when everyone else does.

Boru

(October 8, 2014 at 6:26 pm)ShaMan Wrote:

(October 8, 2014 at 6:11 pm)Deidre32 Wrote: So, I'm curious...do you ever see this behavior displayed in your everyday life?

Yes. Collective ego structures are not hidden. Race, gender, politics, team sports... Just about every 'group' serves a form of collective ego. Examples such as: 'women's' rights; we 'men' must be strong; we 'blacks' must unite, 'our' country, and 'our' team. Just about everyone, is at most times, unconsciously participating in a 'herd mentality' via a collective ego structure.

ETA: I, as a male who stays home and tends to the household while my wife wins the bread, have taken an obvious step outside of the 'herd' of men, and indeed much of society's mentality that regards men as the primary breadwinners.

I'm so glad you chimed in.
This is a depth of perspective I was hoping we'd get into...
You're right. Whether we admit it or are cognizant of it or not, we all probably to various degrees, partake in herd mentality. (I try to fight it though, lol)

Yes, even though the gender role 'norms' are changing, you probably are not seen as being part of the mainstream herd. Which is why you are my new hero. I didn't know this about you--that's really awesome to read. You're right though, as to how it may still be perceived by the mainstream 'herd.'

@Deidre32...
In the "Hate" thread you wrote...

(October 8, 2014 at 5:43 pm)Deidre32 Wrote: herd mentality, especially when the herd is wrong

Considering that we are probably unconsciously already associated/identified with a certain herd mentality (respectively), does this not also suggest that to some other mentality, ours is also prone to being 'wrong'?

(October 8, 2014 at 7:02 pm)ShaMan Wrote: @Deidre32...
In the "Hate" thread you wrote...

(October 8, 2014 at 5:43 pm)Deidre32 Wrote: herd mentality, especially when the herd is wrong

Considering that we are probably unconsciously already associated/identified with a certain herd mentality (respectively), does this not also suggest that to some other mentality, ours is also prone to being 'wrong'?

I manage to always follow the 'right' herd.

jk

Point taken. When I post threads, I honestly want to learn from others. It's nice to be able to vent sure, but even better to learn something I might not have considered before posting a thread.

I think even war and picking sides during it is an extension to this thing

(October 8, 2014 at 6:11 pm)Deidre32 Wrote: Suppose the herd is full of bullies, and people who, if you dissent from the herd, will berate or shun you?

Not exactly what you are saying, but:

1. Nazi Germany
2. Zimbardo
3. Milgram

The willingness to do bad when identifying with a group is unavoidable.

I don't mindlessly follow herds like most. I intentionally ride along with various herds to benefit myself. If the benefits start to wane I hop over to another herd.

I'm a rattlesnake caught in a cattle stampede.