Am I nuts? I like Jesus..:)

[JackRussell]

Well it is a cult. Guess who Jesus is in N Korea??

The guy who invented the Hyundai? Or is that South Korea?

Kia/Hyundai

It's all Greek to me.

Alexander went further than I thought.

[drfuzzy]

---

"He that loveth father or mother more than me is not worthy of me: and he that loveth son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me. Matthew 10:37"

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So what? JC knew there'd be ructions within a family if one of its members decided to follow him instead of the old traditional religion, so that verse is just to let them know he's got their backs, and they quickly realised-
"Jesus saved you from the empty way of life handed you by your forefathers" (1 Pet 1:18 )
"Don't conform to the pattern of this world" (Rom 12:2)
"You were dead when you followed the ways of the world" (Eph 2:1/2)

Same when I'm leading my human squad in the Armed Assault 3 computer game (below), I tell them "Forget all you've heard before and just stick with me if you want to live"..-

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Maybe atheist forums needs to set a deadline, and if we don't see a True Believer (of any faith) by then, we just declare victory and close up shop.
From God's perspective, there is no difference between a world filled with atheists and a world filled with apostates, heretics and blasphemers.  
A world bereft of True Believers has no need for Atheists.

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Not sure I understand mate. What is a "True Believer"?
Remember, a lot of 'christians' think they're true believers, but have got a nasty shock coming-
Jesus said- "Not all who call me "Lord,Lord" will enter the kingdom of heaven. Then I'll tell them plainly, I never knew you, get away from me" (Matt 7:21-23)

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Jesus wants to tune us in to the harmony?!  What a goofball.

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 Better to be kool and tune into 'The Force' rather than be jumpy and irritable..


 

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You know what would be a whole bunch of fun?  Trap GC, DropShip, Drich, JBrentonK and Little Rik in an escape room together and record the interaction.

Sounds fun, there'd certainly be fireworks if they're fundies and I set them straight..
Where do they hang?

See, here's whats interesting about that response.  You seem to be trying to be amusing.  But you don't know any of these folks, you probably haven't even read their posts.  
Yet you still offer to set them straight.  (Yeah good luck with that.  I was raised fundie. Their minds do NOT change.) To suggest that they need YOU to "set them straight" - what arrogance.  The level of disrespect is mind-boggling.  You assume, in one flash of ignorance, that these strangers are somehow childish and mentally-deficient - too illiterate to research and decide what to believe on their own.
       Everyone who tries to "convert" someone else to any belief is practically shouting at them "I'M RIGHT, YOU'RE WRONG, HOW COULD YOU BE SO STUPID?"  -- It would be different if there was a shred of evidence to back the claims, but we're talking about nearly coming to blows here over which has the higher IQ - the Easter Bunny or the Tooth Fairy?

Which is why I leave religious people alone until they start preaching.  Then I need EVIDENCE for their claims.  No books, no fantasies, no personal experiences - just proof, thank you.

[Astonished]

---

So what? JC knew there'd be ructions within a family if one of its members decided to follow him instead of the old traditional religion, so that verse is just to let them know he's got their backs, and they quickly realised-
"Jesus saved you from the empty way of life handed you by your forefathers" (1 Pet 1:18 )
"Don't conform to the pattern of this world" (Rom 12:2)
"You were dead when you followed the ways of the world" (Eph 2:1/2)

Same when I'm leading my human squad in the Armed Assault 3 computer game (below), I tell them "Forget all you've heard before and just stick with me if you want to live"..-

---

---

---

Not sure I understand mate. What is a "True Believer"?
Remember, a lot of 'christians' think they're true believers, but have got a nasty shock coming-
Jesus said- "Not all who call me "Lord,Lord" will enter the kingdom of heaven. Then I'll tell them plainly, I never knew you, get away from me" (Matt 7:21-23)

---

---

---

 Better to be kool and tune into 'The Force' rather than be jumpy and irritable..

---

---

Sounds fun, there'd certainly be fireworks if they're fundies and I set them straight..
Where do they hang?

See, here's whats interesting about that response.  You seem to be trying to be amusing.  But you don't know any of these folks, you probably haven't even read their posts.  
Yet you still offer to set them straight.  (Yeah good luck with that.  I was raised fundie. Their minds do NOT change.) To suggest that they need YOU to "set them straight" - what arrogance.  The level of disrespect is mind-boggling.  You assume, in one flash of ignorance, that these strangers are somehow childish and mentally-deficient - too illiterate to research and decide what to believe on their own.
       Everyone who tries to "convert" someone else to any belief is practically shouting at them "I'M RIGHT, YOU'RE WRONG, HOW COULD YOU BE SO STUPID?"  -- It would be different if there was a shred of evidence to back the claims, but we're talking about nearly coming to blows here over which has the higher IQ - the Easter Bunny or the Tooth Fairy?

Which is why I leave religious people alone until they start preaching.  Then I need EVIDENCE for their claims.  No books, no fantasies, no personal experiences - just proof, thank you.

They don't even need to start preaching. Simply declaring themselves a believer is already a middle finger to us, IMO. It's implicit simply in their identity. Keeping that to themselves, not saying a word about it, that's about all they can do to foster tolerance, otherwise, fuck 'em.

[Dropship]

Dropship asked- What exactly are the "iffy" things Jesus said that you're having trouble with?
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

See post #47 on page 5 of this thread.

Thanks mate, I see you listed 9 quotes there which you call "bad stuff", but you don't tell us why you don't like them, are we supposed to guess?..
For example here's one you quoted-
"And every one that hath forsaken houses, or brethren, or sisters, or father, or mother, or wife, or children, or lands, for my name's sake, shall receive an hundredfold, and shall inherit everlasting life." Matthew 19:29

and it seems alright to me because it stresses the need for us to be rebels and not run with the mindless herd.
For example who did Jesus say was the greatest man ever to be born?
Some famous King maybe? Or one of the ancient prophets? A wise philosopher or mystic perhaps?
Nah! Jesus's cousin John was a young world-rejecter living rough in the middle of nowhere eating wild food and dressed in near-rags, sometimes going in town to yell insults at the snooty priests and corrupt rulers.
Jesus's verdict on him? -
"John is the greatest man ever to be born" (Matt 11:11)

Below- John in action against Herod and his floozy-

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Uh, here's a fucking thought, how about Jeebus be a more upstanding person and go jump up his own ass instead of threatening to tear families apart if one of their members happens to be stupid enough to buy into his bullshit?..

Careful mate or people might think you're a mammy's boy..

---

Sounds fun, there'd certainly be fireworks if they're fundies and I set them straight..
Where do they hang?

See, here's whats interesting about that response.  You seem to be trying to be amusing.  But you don't know any of these folks, you probably haven't even read their posts..  

I know, that's why I said "IF" they're fundies I'll bust their asses. Now tell me where they hang so I can go check them out..

---

..And you wonder why people are calling you names.

Steady on mate, I've got an army of loyal fans all over internetland, here's some of their feedback I get..-

Spannerose- "I would like you to know that the result of reading your posts I am left with the desire to pick up my bible for the first time in years"
ChildofLight - "So good to read your responses, some are quite witty and made LOL"
HenryS - "You are brilliant in finding appropriate phrases. Another one of your superb emails to store"
Sarah4Jesus - "Listen to him, he is a great teacher"
Kierri - "That was one of the best explanations I've ever heard!"
Haimehenmmli - "I LOVE IT MATE!!! I'm going to put it into my files, with some of my other favorites, from you"
Saipan1777 - "Spot on, bravo"
Ainglkiss - "You write so well. Keep up the great work"
BlessedOne - "Glad to have you here! Jesus is the way!"
MonkGirl - "Wow, thank you! That is really comforting...and all I really needed to hear!"
JeffC - "HELL YEAH! PREACH IT BROTHER, THE REALITY WAY! (LUV YUR STYLE....)
Honeybearx - "This was very good reading thank you"
Megan - "I just wanted to tell you that I loved this story, it was very touching"
Sherry Anne - " i love your posts"
Antipas - "Brilliant yet again"
Easynote - "ROFL you are pure class, another of your timeless classics!"
Kermit - "RIGHT ON THE MONEY AND FUNNY, TOO"
Chrysalis55- "Just want to say, I love your posts and your messages not only inspire me, sometimes they make me laugh"
Evenflow- "I just LOVE this post You have made me smile BIG TIME this morning. Good for you and what a great attitude you have to life xx"
Luismtzzz- "I like how you reason religion. I am enjoying your answers"
Apple Pie - "Come on over to 4church, we could do with your input and your humour"
Lillian - "please come back..it's nice having you on the board"

[Astonished]

You have a lot of grandparents, I guess. Probably a result of inbreeding. Explains a lot about you, actually.

[Succubus]

Steady on mate, I've got an army of loyal fans all over internetland, here's some of their feedback I get..-

Spannerose- "I would like you to know that the result of reading your posts I am left with the desire to pick up my bible for the first time in years"
ChildofLight - "So good to read your responses, some are quite witty and made LOL"
HenryS - "You are brilliant in finding appropriate phrases. Another one of your superb emails to store"
Sarah4Jesus - "Listen to him, he is a great teacher"
Kierri - "That was one of the best explanations I've ever heard!"
Haimehenmmli - "I LOVE IT MATE!!! I'm going to put it into my files, with some of my other favorites, from you"
Saipan1777 - "Spot on, bravo"
Ainglkiss - "You write so well. Keep up the great work"
BlessedOne - "Glad to have you here! Jesus is the way!"
MonkGirl - "Wow, thank you! That is really comforting...and all I really needed to hear!"
JeffC - "HELL YEAH! PREACH IT BROTHER, THE REALITY WAY! (LUV YUR STYLE....)
Honeybearx - "This was very good reading thank you"
Megan - "I just wanted to tell you that I loved this story, it was very touching"
Sherry Anne - " i love your posts"
Antipas - "Brilliant yet again"
Easynote - "ROFL you are pure class, another of your timeless classics!"
Kermit - "RIGHT ON THE MONEY AND FUNNY, TOO"
Chrysalis55- "Just want to say, I love your posts and your messages not only inspire me, sometimes they make me laugh"
Evenflow- "I just LOVE this post You have made me smile BIG TIME this morning. Good for you and what a great attitude you have to life xx"
Luismtzzz- "I like how you reason religion. I am enjoying your answers"
Apple Pie - "Come on over to 4church, we could do with your input and your humour"
Lillian - "please come back..it's nice having you on the board"

How very revealing.

[Astonished]

Steady on mate, I've got an army of loyal fans all over internetland, here's some of their feedback I get..-

Spannerose- "I would like you to know that the result of reading your posts I am left with the desire to pick up my bible for the first time in years"
ChildofLight - "So good to read your responses, some are quite witty and made LOL"
HenryS - "You are brilliant in finding appropriate phrases. Another one of your superb emails to store"
Sarah4Jesus - "Listen to him, he is a great teacher"
Kierri - "That was one of the best explanations I've ever heard!"
Haimehenmmli - "I LOVE IT MATE!!! I'm going to put it into my files, with some of my other favorites, from you"
Saipan1777 - "Spot on, bravo"
Ainglkiss - "You write so well. Keep up the great work"
BlessedOne - "Glad to have you here! Jesus is the way!"
MonkGirl - "Wow, thank you! That is really comforting...and all I really needed to hear!"
JeffC - "HELL YEAH! PREACH IT BROTHER, THE REALITY WAY! (LUV YUR STYLE....)
Honeybearx - "This was very good reading thank you"
Megan - "I just wanted to tell you that I loved this story, it was very touching"
Sherry Anne - " i love your posts"
Antipas - "Brilliant yet again"
Easynote - "ROFL you are pure class, another of your timeless classics!"
Kermit - "RIGHT ON THE MONEY AND FUNNY, TOO"
Chrysalis55- "Just want to say, I love your posts and your messages not only inspire me, sometimes they make me laugh"
Evenflow- "I just LOVE this post You have made me smile BIG TIME this morning. Good for you and what a great attitude you have to life xx"
Luismtzzz- "I like how you reason religion. I am enjoying your answers"
Apple Pie - "Come on over to 4church, we could do with your input and your humour"
Lillian - "please come back..it's nice having you on the board"

How very revealing.

Ooh, do tell. I'm always up for hearing a competing theory. If these people aren't in some way an elderly generation of his family coddling their special little fella, what's your take on how this genetic aberration managed to work a keyboard?

[drfuzzy]

Dropship asked-

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 What exactly are the "iffy" things Jesus said that you're having trouble with?
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

See post #47 on page 5 of this thread.

---

---

Thanks mate, I see you listed 9 quotes there which you call "bad stuff", but you don't tell us why you don't like them, are we supposed to guess?..
For example here's one you quoted-
"And every one that hath forsaken houses, or brethren, or sisters, or father, or mother, or wife, or children, or lands, for my name's sake, shall receive an hundredfold, and shall inherit everlasting life." Matthew 19:29

and it seems alright to me because it stresses the need for us to be rebels and not run with the mindless herd.
For example who did Jesus say was the greatest man ever to be born?
Some famous King maybe? Or one of the ancient prophets? A wise philosopher or mystic perhaps?
Nah! Jesus's cousin John was a young world-rejecter living rough in the middle of nowhere eating wild food and dressed in near-rags, sometimes going in town to yell insults at the snooty priests and corrupt rulers.
Jesus's verdict on him? -
"John is the greatest man ever to be born" (Matt 11:11)

Below- John in action against Herod and his floozy-
  

---

---

---

Uh, here's a fucking thought, how about Jeebus be a more upstanding person and go jump up his own ass instead of threatening to tear families apart if one of their members happens to be stupid enough to buy into his bullshit?..

---

---

 Careful mate or people might think you're a mammy's boy..

---

---

See, here's whats interesting about that response.  You seem to be trying to be amusing.  But you don't know any of these folks, you probably haven't even read their posts..  

I know, that's why I said "IF" they're fundies I'll bust their asses. Now tell me where they hang so I can go check them out..

---

..And you wonder why people are calling you names.

Steady on mate, I've got an army of loyal fans all over internetland, here's some of their feedback I get..-

Spannerose- "I would like you to know that the result of reading your posts I am left with the desire to pick up my bible for the first time in years"
ChildofLight - "So good to read your responses, some are quite witty and made LOL"
HenryS - "You are brilliant in finding appropriate phrases. Another one of your superb emails to store"
Sarah4Jesus - "Listen to him, he is a great teacher"
Kierri - "That was one of the best explanations I've ever heard!"
Haimehenmmli - "I LOVE IT MATE!!! I'm going to put it into my files, with some of my other favorites, from you"
Saipan1777 - "Spot on, bravo"
Ainglkiss - "You write so well. Keep up the great work"
BlessedOne - "Glad to have you here! Jesus is the way!"
MonkGirl - "Wow, thank you! That is really comforting...and all I really needed to hear!"
JeffC - "HELL YEAH! PREACH IT BROTHER, THE REALITY WAY! (LUV YUR STYLE....)
Honeybearx - "This was very good reading thank you"
Megan - "I just wanted to tell you that I loved this story, it was very touching"
Sherry Anne - " i love your posts"
Antipas - "Brilliant yet again"
Easynote - "ROFL you are pure class, another of your timeless classics!"
Kermit - "RIGHT ON THE MONEY AND FUNNY, TOO"
Chrysalis55- "Just want to say, I love your posts and your messages not only inspire me, sometimes they make me laugh"
Evenflow- "I just LOVE this post You have made me smile BIG TIME this morning. Good for you and what a great attitude you have to life xx"
Luismtzzz- "I like how you reason religion. I am enjoying your answers"
Apple Pie - "Come on over to 4church, we could do with your input and your humour"
Lillian - "please come back..it's nice having you on the board"

IF they're fundies you'll bust their asses. This lovely "xtian" sentiment applies to anyone who disagrees with the moronic brain-damaged worldview you're peddling.  You have just proved my point.  You're so insane you think your job is to teach others.  And where do they hang out?  Here.  Search their username, if you have the mental capacity to figure out how to do so.   

And as for that list of your "fans", it sure looks like they come from a xtian site.  IF you didn't make up that list, you were preaching to the choir.  You should go back.  Here at AF, we actually THINK.

[Whateverist]

Damn, what is wrong with me?  I think this guy Dipship is a total loon.  But then just look at his reviews!  

You're a nut alright, Dipship, but at least some people like you just the way you are.  I don't know why I am blind to your charms.  Maybe it's Satan?

[Dropship]

You're a nut alright, Dipship, but at least some people like you just the way you are.  I don't know why I am blind to your charms.  Maybe it's Satan?

Yes mate, Satan has got you and your mates by the goolies..
Remember, atheists haven't got Jesus in their heads to act as a bouncer to keep out parasitic life forms ("demons"), so they get in dead easy-
Jesus said- "When an evil spirit comes out of a man, it goes through arid places seeking rest and does not find it.
Then it says, 'I will return to the house I left.'
When it arrives, it finds the house unoccupied, swept clean and put in order.
Then it goes and takes with it seven other spirits more wicked than itself, and they go in and live there."- Matt 12:43-45

And when they're in there, they bend the will of their victim to their own, like bullying drill instructors-

"I want your D.O.R. boy!"


Unlike Ripley's alien implant, demons don't show up on x-rays and scans, but we can easily spot who's hosting one because they use their victim like a ventriloquist's dummy to spout anti-christian hatred-



"Demons" is an old-fashioned word, they're simply malignant life-forms that may have had physical bodies once, but evolved into purely invisible entities, or don't you believe in evolution?
Nobody gets through the pearlies with a demon hijacker aboard, which is why Jesus went around casting them out of people-

"Leave him!"


Oops sorry, was I rambling?..