My sister came out of the closet today...

[Brian37]

Hormones, male or female are a clusterfuck for youngsters. But has she considered if she is bisexual? Having same sex doesn't preclude someone from sexually being attracted to both sexes. And there is a difference between sexual atraction and emotional attraction although those things can and do overlap.

I cant tell you how lucky I was even in my 20s I didn't knock someone up and even feel lucky I didn't get my x pregnant.

She still needs to know herself and what she wants for herself for her future. I was in relationships just for the thought of the warm fuzzies it gave me to feel needed, but that was not love, that was hormones.

But it is nice in any case to see an increasing world where that kind of revolation isn't considered evil. I'd worry more about her doing something stupid like getting pregnant or ending up in an abusive situation regardless.

Hopefully if she wants any type of relationship, she will find someone that treates her well and loves her.

[Erinome]

Q1: you brought her up?

Yeah, they moved in with me when I was 18 and they were 12 and 13. Before that, I took care of them since I was 5. My mother isn't very maternal. She's pretty self-absorbed.

Q2: what's confusing? is it that you didn't pick up on it, or that she was previously boy crazy, or something else?

While she's always been a little... abrasive and rough around the edges, she's always been boy crazy. She never once showed any interest in the same sex. Thinking back on it, every boyfriend she ever had didn't last very long. She always tried to find something wrong with them all. I'm also shocked, because she's the sister that always rebelled against anything I said. She was conservative, because I was liberal, she's christian, because I'm an atheist. When I married my gay best friend, she called me "fag lover", and a "freak of nature", because we were in love with each other, though not sexually involved.

I don't know where she stands on all that stuff now. I didn't ask, because the situation didn't feel appropriate.

[TaraJo]

When I married my gay best friend, she called me "fag lover", and a "freak of nature", because we were in love with each other, though not sexually involved.

I don't know where she stands on all that stuff now. I didn't ask, because the situation didn't feel appropriate.

Good. Don't. I've seen how painful that kind of a shift can be; don't make it any more difficult for her than it has to be. Even though you're an atheist, you might consider looking up a GLBT friendly church for her to go to. They might be able to help her rectify her religious beliefs with her sexual orientation.

[Erinome]

Hormones, male or female are a clusterfuck for youngsters. But has she considered if she is bisexual? Having same sex doesn't preclude someone from sexually being attracted to both sexes. And there is a difference between sexual atraction and emotional attraction although those things can and do overlap.

I asked her if she was bi, she said she's just gay, she's always been gay, but was afraid to admit it until a few months ago... even to herself.

She said she's been seeing women secretly for 5 years now. Blew my mind.

[Ryantology]

Here's a question: does it make a guy gay if he wants to suck my dick?

I'd say someone who is gay is someone who displays a clear preference for sex with the same gender. So, it would depend on that.

[jonb]

Accept who you are. Nobody will think any less of you... except Godschild, Lion, Drich, Fr0d0, Mehmet and Christian.

But their judgement is soooo important to me!

[Erinome]

Good. Don't. I've seen how painful that kind of a shift can be; don't make it any more difficult for her than it has to be. Even though you're an atheist, you might consider looking up a GLBT friendly church for her to go to. They might be able to help her rectify her religious beliefs with her sexual orientation.

It's none of my business, really. She's the type of person, if I said I love purple teddy bears, she'd take a special interest in being anti purple teddy bears. I learned that early on, and used it to my/her advantage many times. For instance, I told her I hated the idea of her staying close to home for college, because I felt like she needed to get away, and have that experience. She just moved out of my house with her degree 2 years ago.

[Brian37]

When I married my gay best friend, she called me "fag lover", and a "freak of nature", because we were in love with each other, though not sexually involved.

I don't know where she stands on all that stuff now. I didn't ask, because the situation didn't feel appropriate.

Good. Don't. I've seen how painful that kind of a shift can be; don't make it any more difficult for her than it has to be. Even though you're an atheist, you might consider looking up a GLBT friendly church for her to go to. They might be able to help her rectify her religious beliefs with her sexual orientation.

While I am for watering down religion for the perposes of civility, the fact remans that homonsexuality, in our evolution has been widely frowned upon in most cultures. It is because of a lack of understanding that homosexuality is merely a minority range outcome, but a quite nomral manifestation of human behavior.

Having said that, I really don't get people who get into a religion that for the most part demonizes a given group. It is nice that some people can find comfort with like minded people, but the history of Christianity, stems from a mesognistic past that even today frowns upon homosexuality.

I get the same lip twitch when blacks today, not all, but some, condemn same sex marriage knowing what they themselves went through in their history.

I found solice at one point in my life, in my early age of my atheism at a Unitarian Church. If there is any more liberal a religion, I cant think of one. I don't go anymore because I merely outgrew the need for self conformation in that context.

But it sounds like this lady has an upper hand being surrounded by acceptance.