The Insult Thread

[gargantuan]

Calling all crack pot believers, arrogant atheist, whiney yanks, crass ozzies, pointless canadians and ye noble and fair folk of the British Isles (whereby I mean England only), this is the insult thread.

It stared life here... but for the sake of the children it's been started a fresh here and has been clearly labelled so as to avoid any undue confusion or actual offence.

A good insult is poetry. When a well crafted aspersion lands in it's recipients ears it should dazzle and amaze them, before sending them running to the library, tears streaming down their faces as they frantically tear out the pages of the Oxford Unabridged Thesaurus in hope of crafting a prolix rebuttal so sharp it's victim will swear they can taste lemons sprinkled with glass.

Try to keep it funny, although that might be a bit difficult when slagging of people from Texas, since there's nothing funny about being fat gun toting misogynists.... or is there?

No. There isn't.

Also, try to keep it general. I don't need to know how much of a cunt you think I am, but I'd love to hear how much of a cunt you thing the French are in general.

Here's my opening Salvo:

America is stupid, insensitive and brash. Unlike Canada. Canada is all that with added French.

[lrh9]

Effective and simple one or two liners can be just as funny.

"My wife told me she wanted to go on vacation. She said she wanted to go somewhere she had never been before. I said, 'Try the kitchen!'"

[theVOID]

From comedian turned city councilor Ewen Gilmore:

"My assistant came to me the other day and asked "Ewen, what should we do with the prostitution bill?" - Well... Pay it..."

[Dotard]

fat gun toting misogynists....

Fat (read: Prosperous) Gun toting (read: protective) Misogynist... another reason I'm toting the gun.

Ahhhh... the French. They don't know the meaning of the word "fear" - but then again they don't know the meaning of most words. I don't know what makes them so dumb but it really works.
I really don't think they are cowards who run from a cap gun, but what's my opinion compared to that of thousands of others?

Seriously though, one frenchman can do the work of three men: Larry, Curly & Moe.