1. It will be revealed that Keith Richards actually died in 1974, but was replaced by a replicant.
2. Rick Santorum will give up politics and will go on to become a groupie and go on tour with the Butthole Surfers.
3. Todd Akin and Ted Cruz will come out of the closet and get married.
4. Jello Biafra will change party affiliation to Republican, secure the presidential nomination and will choose Ted Nugent as his running mate.
2. Rick Santorum will give up politics and will go on to become a groupie and go on tour with the Butthole Surfers.
3. Todd Akin and Ted Cruz will come out of the closet and get married.
4. Jello Biafra will change party affiliation to Republican, secure the presidential nomination and will choose Ted Nugent as his running mate.




