Victim Blaming?

[LadyForCamus]

There is a difference between being at fault and being responsible (in your own actions). There is also a difference between giving advice for foresight, and giving advice for hindsight.

A rape victim is never at fault for being raped, because the act of being raped isn't their own. A potential rape victim (and let's face it, that includes everyone) can do some responsible things to try and avoid becoming a rape victim. Sometimes those responsible things will work, sometimes they won't, because there is no way to avoid being raped with a 100% certainty. Staying in groups of friends, drinking responsibly, pre-booking taxis, etc. are all examples of responsible things that can minimize the chances of being raped.

This advice is good to use as foresight. That is, if someone is going out to a party, it's reasonable to tell them "you should do x, y, z and stay safe". However, this advice is not any good (or any use) in hindsight. If said person gets raped at the party, it's not ever reasonable, or indeed ever polite, to tell them "well you should have done x, y, z and you wouldn't have been raped". The simple reason being, that neither x, y, or z are guarantees that someone will not be raped.

^^^ This. This was exactly what I was trying to communicate, but of course, you did a much clearer and more succinct job of communicating it, Tibs. [emoji6] Thank you.