My 10 Commandments

[Kyuuketsuki]

It is often claimed by theists (even quite moderate ones) that the 10 commandments are a fairly good moral guide ... I disagree but that's not the subject of this post. I was looking through my old stuff (very complicated, contrary to popular opinion most of my archived stuff is a complete mess, merely a record of what I posted over the last 10 years or so) and I saw an old post of my version of the 10 commandments so I thought it would be fun (semi-serious fun) to repost them and see what everyone would post as theirs.

1. You shall worship no gods false or otherwise unless you can actually supply validatable evidence that, reasonably interpreted, indicates fairly clearly that the that such a deity exists, is real or holds any sway over the observable universe as we know it!
   
2. You shall make no graven images of such gods unless you are playing in some kind of dungeons and dragons style game or are a fan of one of those massively multiplayer online role-playing games things. Obviously, it stands to reason that if you can't prove any such gods exists you shouldn't make any graven images of it because you're gonna look pretty damned stupid if you do!
   
3. You may freely use any words or a religious nature for cursing, swearing or whatever for where would our ability to swear be without religion?
   
4. Remember that the Sabbath day is just a day like any other but that it is great fun to be a day that you can relax on a let others do the work for you if you are clever enough to get away with it. Remember to demand double (preferably triple) time if your employer wants you to work on it for it is a day to be held as special as others especially when it involves bacon & eggs for breakfast.
   
5. Always honour your father and your mother unless they are abusive and treat you like shit in which case pretty much anything goes!
   
6. Do not kill except in the name of self-defence, national defence and any other reason that can be logically argued or presumed to be in your or your local group's best interests. Always bear in mind those who say, "do not kill under any circumstances", that they are called pacifists and don't fight at all when you march into their country and trample them underfoot, if you've just lost a war these are good for a bit of light relief!
   
7. Do not commit adultery for the consequences are awful to behold, not only divorce but financial ruin. On the serious side fight for your marriage and if you have children bear in mind that those few hours of carnal pleasure (fun though they may be) and the consequent divorce and hostility will "screw" them up for life!
   
8. Do not steal ... if you do you'll be put away for a long time but more importantly not be able to claim morally that you have any right to possession of your own stuff!
   
9. Do not lie and don't come crying to us when you find that people think you’re garbage if you do!
   
10. Face it, we are an aggressive species and it is often "keeping up with the Joneses" that drives us to get what we want to have ... so not to covet (want or desire) what another has is plainly ridiculous! All you have to do is make sure that you don't want something so much you're prepared to break other commandments to get it!

Note, I didn't have to change them much apart from flashing up the wording a bit.

Kyu