(December 30, 2018 at 1:54 am)lookinforhope Wrote: Hi,
I'm here out of desperation. I'm hoping someone can help me. I thought I was saved (a Christian) for 11 years. In that time, everything I did was for God. Then I pray this prayer, asking God to show me what was causing my long-term anxiety and depression. Do you know what He shows me?! He shows me that I was never really saved in the first place and that I never can be because I got married when He told me not to. I did exactly what the Rich Young Ruler in the Bible did if you don't mind looking up the story. I have had anxiety and depression ever since I have been together with my husband so I know this relationship was not God's will. I remember God telling me that I would go to hell if I married him but I didn't believe Him because that sounds ridiculous. Also, I thought you got saved by believing that Christ died for your sins, which I did do before I married my husband. Upon further study of the scriptures there are TONS of conditions you have to meet in order to be saved. There are SO MANY works, yet Christians say it's not by works. Christians say that salvation is FREE but they are LIARS because salvation is NOT free. Only those willing to pay the price get to go to heaven and that number is few. I am so pissed. I even went to my pastor and his wife before I got married for help because I was unsure of my salvation as well as the marriage I was about to enter into. I need help. When I first found out I was going to hell, I cried in my room for 2 years. I've spent this 3rd year trying unsuccessfully to learn how to function again. I have 4 beautiful children who need me. I wish I could just become and atheist and be done with this but I can't. I had actual encounters with God, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit. I can't deny Him. I can't walk around disabled, unable to function, and hyperventilating all the day long. I didn't know God was so cruel. Please help me, I don't know what to do. I need to live a good & productive life.
I believe you're stressing out over nothing.
The only unforgivable sin is the blasphemy of the holy spirit, whom you choose to marry has nothing to do with your salvation, did not Jesus forgive the woman who had 5 different husbands and was currently living with a man who she wasn't married to?
Do you love your spouse? If yes, then that's all that matters.
