How would you react to finding out you were making out with a transsexual?

[Yonadav]

Do we really need to decide what labels Yon can use?

We do if he claims to be a 'double' authority on the subject and giving out harmful advice to those leading an entirely different life to him.

It's like someone bisexual claiming to be gay telling people who lead a 100% gay life that they shouldn't do something gay. And then calling it rape when they object.

You are such an ignoramus. 
I'm a transsexual who has been pondering trans ethics for several decades, have been an activist for trans rights for decades, have decades of lived transsexual experience, and I really do qualify as an expert. You're just an ignorant blowhard with extremely strong opinions about issues that you don't know anything about.

What makes the chick with the dick more 'authentically' transsexual than me? (That's not an attack on TaraJo, but Mathilda really wants to go there)
I have a surgically constructed vagina between my legs and spent 17 years living in the gender role of a woman.  
If you think that I'm not a transsexual anymore, then you really do have the incredibly ignorant opinion that clothing is gender.

When TaraJo is considering becoming intimate with someone, she has to decide when to tell them she has a penis.
When I am considering becoming intimate with someone, I have to decide when to tell them about my vagina.
During the 17 years that I spent living as a woman, I had to decide when to tell them that I had once been male.

So holy fucking shit, Mathilda! I actually have tons and tons of experience dealing with exactly what TaraJo is asking about. And you idiotically think that despite my tons of experience with exactly this issue, and my tons and tons of experience with trans ethics, that I am unqualified to discuss the matter because you are a clueless idiot who has incredibly strong opinions on issues that you don't know anything about. 

I enjoy having a woman's body and projecting a male persona. Transsexuals don't have to conform with your ignorant stereotypes. Dresses and lipstick don't have as much to do with gender identity as you ignorantly imagine.