(January 27, 2020 at 12:42 pm)Mr Greene Wrote:(January 27, 2020 at 12:25 pm)tackattack Wrote: Strangely I think I agree with the overall OLB point on heroes. Going above the call of duty. To see a firefighter rush into a building to save 2 kids seems brave and honorable, but not necessarily heroic. To watch a passerby do it, because it's not their "job" seems fittingly heroic.
@Mr Greene -I disagree. Being your kids hero is not "part of the job" of parenting. I actually agree with OLB that it's the example part that is part of the job description by necessity at the very least. I don't think anything in the quality of that example necessitate heroism as part of the job. Parents have a super amount of influence on a child's formative years and in hindsight usually seem like an ideal that is either thoughtlessly mimicked or sought for intentionally.
Factoring that with the above example, if your child sees you be the stranger that does something heroic, then that's an added caveat to your example. I've seen people upset with their partner for doing something they saw as "risky" or "dumb" to be heroic to a stranger, putting their lives at risk to the immediate family member and got scolded for it instead of praised as a hero.
Failure to be seen to be your kids hero is to fail at being a parent. Failure to be a role model. If you don't remember viewing your own parents in that manner indicates poor parenting bordering on abuse or neglect.
I always loved my mother, but she wasn't my "hero" growing up. She became my hero when I watched her die with more dignity than I've ever mustered in any action in my life. The value of a parent isn't always evident from childhood. Your best lessons may still come later. I know mine did.
