[Serious] The love of a God

[zwanzig]

I had a friend bear his testimony to me today. He's someone who struggles with chronic pain and debilitating conditions, exacerbated by past injuries. He told me that when he was younger, he used to get irritated by people not moving fast enough around him and it caused him to feel a lot of contention and anger in his heart. So, he prayed to the Lord for patience. Then, not long after, he got into a terrible accident, injuring his spine and developed several other conditions that make it hard for him to move very fast. He said the Lord did this to/for him to help him learn empathy for those who used to frustrate him and to help him learn patience.

That's probably one of the things I'll have the hardest time getting over. This concept of pain and suffering being an example of God's lovingly delivered lessons. It makes me furiously angry to think about how much bad in my life I attributed to something I deserved and should be grateful for. I no longer believe there is a God but I am fiercely bitter over the indoctrination I received to believe that pain given to me by someone was love and for my benefit/for my own good. That suffering and tribulation were purifying and elevating tools because I was destined for a higher purpose.

I feel bad for my friend because his testimony, the thing that he feels empowered and enriched by, sounds like abuse.