My favourite person to quote is Mark Twain. I could probably set down a hundred brilliant MT quotes, but for the sake of brevity, I'll just go with a couple of my favourites:
'It does look as if Massachusetts were in a fair way to embarrass me with kindnesses this year. In the first place, a Massachusetts judge has just decided in open court that a Boston publisher may sell, not only his own property in a free and unfettered way, but also may as freely sell property which does not belong to him but to me; property which he has not bought and which I have not sold. Under this ruling I am now advertising that judge's homestead for sale, and, if I make as good a sum out of it as I expect, I shall go on and sell out the rest of his property'
'A God who could make good children as easily as bad, yet preferred to make bad ones; who could have made every one of them happy, yet never made a single happy one; who made them prize their bitter life, yet stingily cut it short; who gave his angels eternal happiness unearned, yet required his other children to earn it; who gave his angels painless lives, yet cursed his other children with biting miseries and maladies of mind and body; who mouths justice, and invented hell — mouths mercy, and invented hell — mouths Golden Rules and forgiveness multiplied by seventy times seven, and invented hell; who mouths morals to other people, and has none himself; who frowns upon crimes, yet commits them all; who created man without invitation, then tries to shuffle the responsibility for man's acts upon man, instead of honorably placing it where it belongs, upon himself; and finally, with altogether divine obtuseness, invites his poor abused slave to worship him!'
There's a quote often attributed to him that I enjoy, though it's not confirmed as his: 'Never argue with an idiot. They'll bring you down to their level and beat you with experience' which I feel is often apt on these forums.
'I thought I'd begin by reading a poem by Shakespeare. But then I thought 'why should I?'. He never reads any of mine' - Spike Milligan
'Before you judge a man, walk a mile in his shoes. After that, who cares? You're a mile away and you have his shoes' - Anon
'It does look as if Massachusetts were in a fair way to embarrass me with kindnesses this year. In the first place, a Massachusetts judge has just decided in open court that a Boston publisher may sell, not only his own property in a free and unfettered way, but also may as freely sell property which does not belong to him but to me; property which he has not bought and which I have not sold. Under this ruling I am now advertising that judge's homestead for sale, and, if I make as good a sum out of it as I expect, I shall go on and sell out the rest of his property'
'A God who could make good children as easily as bad, yet preferred to make bad ones; who could have made every one of them happy, yet never made a single happy one; who made them prize their bitter life, yet stingily cut it short; who gave his angels eternal happiness unearned, yet required his other children to earn it; who gave his angels painless lives, yet cursed his other children with biting miseries and maladies of mind and body; who mouths justice, and invented hell — mouths mercy, and invented hell — mouths Golden Rules and forgiveness multiplied by seventy times seven, and invented hell; who mouths morals to other people, and has none himself; who frowns upon crimes, yet commits them all; who created man without invitation, then tries to shuffle the responsibility for man's acts upon man, instead of honorably placing it where it belongs, upon himself; and finally, with altogether divine obtuseness, invites his poor abused slave to worship him!'
There's a quote often attributed to him that I enjoy, though it's not confirmed as his: 'Never argue with an idiot. They'll bring you down to their level and beat you with experience' which I feel is often apt on these forums.
'I thought I'd begin by reading a poem by Shakespeare. But then I thought 'why should I?'. He never reads any of mine' - Spike Milligan
'Before you judge a man, walk a mile in his shoes. After that, who cares? You're a mile away and you have his shoes' - Anon
