Self-Rejection, Self-Sacrifice, Self-Denial VS Egoism, Earthly Pleasures, Hedonism

[Goosebump]

Why are the “Self- “ stuff in the thread subject highly encouraged even in a secular environment, while the other 3 stuff are highly discouraged, even in a secular environment,

To elaborate we all know and live under capitalism, reject/sacrifice/deny self-interests just to pay bills or alternatively please “society”. And if we dare to stroke our ego by rewarding ourselves with hedonistic earthly pleasures (aka hobbies/interests/passions), we’re “greedy” “selfish” “egoistic” or worse “psychopaths”.

Having a job that matches someone’s interests/passions is a pipe dream, think of average joes’ typical boring jobs

Is “society” just a “secular God” because there’s also a heavy system of pressures, guilt and shame for not keeping up with the many imposed standards, roles, norms. And also perceived rewards for following what it deems desirable approved “status symbols”.

Even after having rejected God, gods, spirits and all that, there’s no escaping pressures, guilt and shame and it sucks, let alone the FOMO of not having the approved “status symbols”.

Why is the society so self-averse or self-“hating”.

Only read your OP post.

Yes, Society.. I'd say societies (Western society is quiet different then say Saharan African society.) have Norms, Expectations and Taboos. These range according to religion and political climates but mostly hew close to the historic bones upon which they were built. 

The nearest to home is The American Dream. Born from the idea of free land if you could claim it now means something like work hard and you might not die poor? No it's more about work hard and you'll be rich some day with all the modern comforts. It's why so many Americans play the lottery and are against inheritance taxes. Not because the vast vast majority sees any benefit from either one of them. But rather it's the dream that some day they could.

It sounds to me like you were sold this dream. If you do the right things, x, y and z you'll get a job you like and live the American Dream. That's rhetoric. But it does work for some people. And the majority of others fit what their lives have become into the very flexible mold of that dream. So if you aren't feeling particularly dream like, it can look like everyone around you is all up in the dream without you.

Life, and life in a society is a complicated mess. You could through on nine more synonyms to complicated and mess and we'd still be a chaotic bog away from the objective insanity that is human life.

Regardless of belief systems, politics and economics, human existence is tricky business. But to be human is personal. You can do whatever you wish.

If you believe in determinism and all your actions are ordained or you think free will is near divine and all your choices are implicitly your own doesn't really matter. You live, you die and that's goodby. Time marches on. So don't get hung up on the details. Do it your way. Who knows, you might discover a new way of life that others flock to benefiting all humankind for countless generations. Or more likely you'll die unnoticed like the multitudes that have come before and contributed nothing but hot air and fertilizer.