Science + Creation

[Angrboda]

Eh, the Catholics got an excuse for everything. If the pope didn't say it from the comfy chair, according to them, it doesn't count. They have the most anal retentive theological excuses ever. "We have apostolic succession." Well who says that matters? "The pope does, whose authority is confirmed by apostolic succession." It's like the bible is true because it's the word of God, and its the word of God because the bible says so, only with a guy wearing a funny hat in the middle. Selling salvation to finance the pope's wild parties. Debauchery in the holy see. Burning people at the stake for daring to translate the bible into English. And they wonder why the peasants revolted? The utter cheek of it. Reading the history of the Catholic church, I'm inclined to agree with the Reformers that Catholicism and the holy see was what was wrong with Christianity, and those black hearted bastards in Rome (or France, or wherever the floating opera that was the papacy happened to be located) needed to be cut out of the picture to save the body of Christ, aka the Real Church, from being lost forever. And this dizzle is actually proud of the papacy? Oofda.

Get this, this is from a page devoted to St. Theresa:

WHY SAINT TERESA OF THE ANDES?

• Because dying at nineteen, Teresa of the Andes is a particularly attractive model of holiness for young people. She shows them where true happiness lies: God is infinite joy!
  

Yes folks! All you have to do is let God stick out his fickle finger of fate, fuck you in the ass with a horrible and fatal disease, and kill you before your prime, and you too can be a role model for the Hitler Youth, er, I mean Catholic Youth... God, I don't know what got into me there. I don't know how I could compare the Catholic Church to the fascism of Nazi Germany, I mean sure, they both sanctioned the theft of Jewish property and the wholesale slaughter of Jews, but beyond that, what possible similarity is there?

You know, I think I've got some pictures of Charles Manson's cell at Corcoran State Prison. You start the paperwork for Beatification, and I'll start writing Charlie's "I discovered Christ and Three Squares a Day in Prison" letters and start a fundraising drive. God knows it wouldn't be the first time the Catholic Church has declared a mass murderer holy.