I'm also sorry for your loss, this must have been a very dear friend and those are not easily attained. I wished I could give you words of comfort, but as for all of us there really aren't any, just know that we all care and understand what it is you are going through.

God loves those who believe and those who do not and the same goes for me, you have no choice in this matter. That puts the matter of total free will to rest.