I think death is beautiful.

[rexbeccarox]

I'm not scared of being dead, but I am scared of the process of dying. I've had a lot of people around me die (all four grandparents, my dad, three friends from high school, a chick who, in her suicide note, specifically named me as one of the main causes she shot herself, a good friend from college), and I'm only 37. I've also faced death a couple of times. The process of dying isn't often peaceful, and is frequently horribly painful, at least in my experience.

On a side note: this thread got me thinking about some stuff. Before my early to mid-teens, I was a spoiled brat. I wasn't nice to people and I lied to and about people all the time. I was generally a bad person. After that girl killed herself, I changed. I won't take responsibility for her suicide- I was a bitch, but not a bully, but it did cause me to become a nicer person. I strive daily to be the nicest person I can be.

Also, before two friends died in (sober) car accidents two weeks apart from each other and, around the same time, another one was murdered by the guy who walked her dog, I was a scaredy cat. No getting me on a rollercoaster, no way! Paragliding, skydiving? not this girl! And now I'm an adrenaline junky. Weird.