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[SteelCurtain]

Yes, all those things, and having ideas and thoughts which are actually interesting, or even that I just had never heard of or thought of before.

I thought so initially or I never would have bothered with them. But upon getting to know them better, I found that I did not admire their intellect as much as I thought I did, and that where I thought I saw intelligence that initially excited me, that was pretty much the best of what they had to offer, and nothing else.

And also, when I got to know them better, not only did they both have serious mental health problems far beyond those I felt comfortable dealing with, but in the case of my first girlfriend, I came to find everything about her tedious and boring, and I suspect that soon would have been the case with my other ex. I didn't even date either of them that long. The latter relationship didn't even last a month, because that time I listened to my instincts and when I saw the red flags, I got the FUCK out.

BTW, the word for someone who is turned on by intelligence and intellect is "sapiosexual," and it describes a LOT of people. Now you have learned a thing on the internet.

Oh, I have this problem, bad. I tend to romanticize every relationship I'm in. I idealize the partners at the beginning, and then as the relationship goes on, they can never live up to the idealized version of them that I originally had, and I end up starting to resent that.

I have dated women that I thought could challenge me intellectually, and they do. They actually do, but then I discover that they are ignorant about something I find fascinating, and then it crumbles. It is the thing I hate the most about myself.

Thanks for dropping the knowledge on me, futile. I am the worlds biggest sapiosexual.