(June 26, 2014 at 3:17 am)Intimae_Hasta Wrote: I have just read an article in my local paper regarding a young father who kept himself ultra fit, but died following a visit to the gym. In the article, it goes on to explain how the mother found it very difficult to tell her children. Up to now, we have a very sad, tragic event that has devastated a family. I have empathy in bucket loads for them, but when it goes on to say that she told the children "Daddy has gone to Heaven to live with the angels", I have a problem. This is just an example story, but every similar one you read involves patronising children and comforting them with fairy tales so they grow up with a warped view of what I call the cycle of life. I honestly believe we should be bringing up children to know about birth, life and death. The sudden loss of a 31 year old father, hitherto fit and healthy, is going to generate far more questions than answers when it is considered from the god, heaven and angels point of view. When these kids ask, "why my daddy?" no doubt the answer will be "god has his reasons". Yeah, right.
The reality is that even stories about god and angels is not going to stop the children feeling the loss, it might take a little off the edges but death is a fundamental fact of life we all need to understand because we are all likely to experience the death of a loved one at some stage in our lives.
I would argue we should not shield our children from the reality of death, of course we should take care, prepare them and help them through it. If we shield children from emotional realities there is a risk of problems with the development of their coping mechanisms and perhaps even their emotional intelligence.
MM
"The greatest deception men suffer is from their own opinions" - Leonardo da Vinci
"I think I use the term “radical” rather loosely, just for emphasis. If you describe yourself as “atheist,” some people will say, “Don’t you mean ‘agnostic’?” I have to reply that I really do mean atheist, I really do not believe that there is a god; in fact, I am convinced that there is not a god (a subtle difference). I see not a shred of evidence to suggest that there is one ... etc., etc. It’s easier to say that I am a radical atheist, just to signal that I really mean it, have thought about it a great deal, and that it’s an opinion I hold seriously." - Douglas Adams (and I echo the sentiment)
"I think I use the term “radical” rather loosely, just for emphasis. If you describe yourself as “atheist,” some people will say, “Don’t you mean ‘agnostic’?” I have to reply that I really do mean atheist, I really do not believe that there is a god; in fact, I am convinced that there is not a god (a subtle difference). I see not a shred of evidence to suggest that there is one ... etc., etc. It’s easier to say that I am a radical atheist, just to signal that I really mean it, have thought about it a great deal, and that it’s an opinion I hold seriously." - Douglas Adams (and I echo the sentiment)
