(December 24, 2014 at 4:37 pm)DIRTY_DEEDS_93 Wrote: My name is Drew, I'm 15, and I need help figuring out what I am. I don't believe in God, but I'm not anti-god. According to the definition of atheism ("The lack of a belief in a god") I would be defined as an atheist right? I don't believe there is a heaven or hell. I believe in ghosts and that you stay on earth when you die. So would I be classified as an atheist? Also, on a side note, my mom has been harassing me to go to church on Christmas (my family is Christian) and she guilt trips me about it constantly, what should I say to make her stop? Also I'm sorry if any terms I used are not correct, I've researched atheism a lot but I've never talked to anybody about it so I wouldn't know what is appropriate or not.
Drew, I agree with a lot of the other folks on this forum: if you don't believe in God, you're an atheist.
I'm sorry that your mom has given you a hard time. You're not alone; a lot of young atheists have run into the same problem.
As it happens, I've researched situations like yours for a book that I've written for teenage atheists. The book'll be out in March, but here's an excerpt that speaks to your situation:
Some experts recommend obedience. “If remaining in your parents’
home has advantages that outweigh having to participate in meaningless
rituals,” said Cliff Walker, editor of the website Positive Atheism, “then you
do well to play the game.… In Oregon, where it gets very cold, hundreds of
grown men spend an hour singing religious songs and listening to religions
sermons just to be able to eat and perhaps sleep at the Rescue Mission.
Sure it’s degrading, but it all depends on what you want.” (The Rescue
Mission probably doesn’t absolutely insist that the homeless attend
religious services, but you get the point.)
Going to church doesn’t have to be all bad. “Try using the trips as a
learning experience,” said Austin Cline of About.com. Richard Wade has
recommended playing anthropologist or psychologist: “Observing the
church members and their ideas as would a scientist in the field might
provide you just enough intellectual distancing to reduce your resentment
and frustration.”
You can try negotiating, too. “After my parents got over the initial
shock and talked the situation over, they formulated a compromise,” said
Caleb, an eighteen-year-old Oregon unbeliever. “I would no longer be
required to attend church every week, but I would have to go to a ‘Critical
Thinking’ class every Monday night.”
Or try saying no. “[My mother] tries to get me to read the Bible, but
I politely refuse,” said Liz, age nineteen. This is a risky strategy, though,
and you probably should use it only if your parents won’t punish you for
it.
Good luck, Drew.
