Be honest, am I going to hell for "my" atheism?

[Esquilax]

It's hard to accept your line of thinking because it isn't true.  I understand your bitterness about being abused as a child--a terrible thing, still some people go through life unable to deal with childhood abuse, while others do much better.  Was it God's fault that you were abused, or the fault of the person or persons who abused you?   If God gave us free will, he's not going to step in control every move we make.  In order to have free will, we must be able to choose good or evil.  How much is our suffering here in the perspective of eternity?  I've been to the edge of suicide twice, but I believe as the apostle Paul believed.

So basically, god prioritizes the free will of abusers to abuse people, over the safety of children. And you're okay with this because...?

Would you also put humans under the same standard, where if they fail to prevent a crime they easily could it's morally good, because they've preserved the free will of criminals? Or is it only god that gets this inexplicable, immoral free pass from you?