Fuck every last bit of what alpha male said. If you try to attract women by being something you're not, happiness will not ensue.
Connecting with another human being is like 95% about empathy. When someone is having trouble, the best thing I know to do is to listen, acknowledge, and ask questions. People need to be validated. A practical example: my girlfriend has a friend who is struggling with addiction really badly. She is really torn up about it. We were talking, and told her how I would be struggling if it were my friend. That I would feel confused and conflicted about what my role is. That I would be sad and angry at the terrible choices my friend was making, but at the same time knowing that it's the disease. I acknowledged her distress by letting her know that all of her feelings are warranted by telling her I feel them, too. I asked her how I could help, what I could do. Knowing the answer is that I can't help.
All of this is to say connecting with other people is all about putting yourself in their shoes, and showing them that you care. Not knowing what to say is not knowing how to connect. This isn't a knowledge you cannot grasp, it's a skill you haven't practiced. Treat it like a logic puzzle: what does a person need when they feel x emotion? How can I fill that need or be of service?
Practice empathy in everything you do. How does this action or decision affect all the people around me? Even small shit matters in the big picture. Doing it in everyday social situations makes it second nature in relationships.
Connecting with another human being is like 95% about empathy. When someone is having trouble, the best thing I know to do is to listen, acknowledge, and ask questions. People need to be validated. A practical example: my girlfriend has a friend who is struggling with addiction really badly. She is really torn up about it. We were talking, and told her how I would be struggling if it were my friend. That I would feel confused and conflicted about what my role is. That I would be sad and angry at the terrible choices my friend was making, but at the same time knowing that it's the disease. I acknowledged her distress by letting her know that all of her feelings are warranted by telling her I feel them, too. I asked her how I could help, what I could do. Knowing the answer is that I can't help.
All of this is to say connecting with other people is all about putting yourself in their shoes, and showing them that you care. Not knowing what to say is not knowing how to connect. This isn't a knowledge you cannot grasp, it's a skill you haven't practiced. Treat it like a logic puzzle: what does a person need when they feel x emotion? How can I fill that need or be of service?
Practice empathy in everything you do. How does this action or decision affect all the people around me? Even small shit matters in the big picture. Doing it in everyday social situations makes it second nature in relationships.
"There remain four irreducible objections to religious faith: that it wholly misrepresents the origins of man and the cosmos, that because of this original error it manages to combine the maximum servility with the maximum of solipsism, that it is both the result and the cause of dangerous sexual repression, and that it is ultimately grounded on wish-thinking." ~Christopher Hitchens, god is not Great
PM me your email address to join the Slack chat! I'll give you a taco(or five) if you join! --->There's an app and everything!<---
PM me your email address to join the Slack chat! I'll give you a taco(or five) if you join! --->There's an app and everything!<---
