(April 19, 2015 at 3:28 pm)pauloroberts Wrote: My girlfriend and I were watching some romantic comedy the other day (not my idea, trust me), and the topic of sexual history came up. So we ended up talking about it, and it turns out that she's got quite a past.I think your a troll but I'm going to dive in anyway. First off the sexual history you mentioned, that's a good thing not a bad thing. To be frank the only thing you should have concerns about is a possible std or if she has a history of cheating. If does have a history of cheating then yes that means she is more likely to do it to you unfortunately if she is going to sleep around on you there isn't shit you can do and whatever you try to do to stop her will make it worse.
She's 27 and here is just some of what she told me...
Her first time was when she was 17
When I asked her how many men she's had sex with she couldn't tell me but when I asked if it was over 20 (jokingly) she said oh yes, way more
The first time she did anal was at the age of 18
She has had a threesome on 3 separate occasions
She has kissed girls in clubs many times
She was a member of fetlife for a couple of years
She mentioned something about doing porn
Those are the highlights but she mentioned quite a lot of other occasions and people.
This is not OK. I've been with her for 3 years and I had no idea about any of this. I always had a feeling about her but I really didn't think it was like this. This is a huge shock to me and what bothers me is that I've invested 3 years of my life with someone whose values and mine most certainly do not gel.
I don't really want to break up with her, but at the same time I can't imagine staying with her and being OK with this. It's going to nag away at me, I know it. I'm a firm believer that her sexual history has a lot to do with the ability to pair bond (or should I say, the inability), and I have seen enough evidence of this with my friends and their girlfriends to confirm it.
I hate to think about it as 3 years is a long time, but I guess I probably will be finishing with her, at least that's how I'm feeling right now. But I just want to get people's opinions, for what it's worth.
However you have a bigger issue here, you need to be honest with her and yourself and find out why she doesn't trust you enough to tell you these things. If you guys cannot be open and honest with each other then this relationship is already dead.
To-morrow, and to-morrow, and to-morrow,
Creeps in this petty pace from day to day,
To the last syllable of recorded time;
And all our yesterdays have lighted fools
The way to dusty death. Out, out, brief candle!
Life's but a walking shadow, a poor player,
That struts and frets his hour upon the stage,
And then is heard no more. It is a tale
Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury,
Signifying nothing.
Creeps in this petty pace from day to day,
To the last syllable of recorded time;
And all our yesterdays have lighted fools
The way to dusty death. Out, out, brief candle!
Life's but a walking shadow, a poor player,
That struts and frets his hour upon the stage,
And then is heard no more. It is a tale
Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury,
Signifying nothing.
