Need a place to confide

[Soloatheist]

Hey guys, I'm new on the forum. But not new to atheism. I started questioning religion when I was probably 17 or so. Grew up in a strong catholic home. Church every Sunday, Catholicism every Monday, and constant teachings, and force feedings to believe in "the holy trinity". Got baptized before I could even think for myself. Went through life pleasing my family by relying on nothing but faith in a story that held no water. I wouldn't say I "turned against God", I just think I came to my own realization. I'm not against religion. In fact, I'm comfortable saying, we all have the right to believe what we want. I'm a happily married man, with two alamazing children. My wife doesn't fully know if my disbelief in God. I've tried opening up a time or two, but she just says she doesn't want to talk about it, because it scares her. I get it, she doesn't want to be "dammed". Just like everyone whom has a strong faith in their religion. My wife is Mormon, and my father, and stepmother are catholic, while my biological mother is Mormon. None of them fully know that I just don't believe it. I can't talk to them about it, because they get upset, and disappointed. So I keep it to myself. I'm not in any way "anti-God", I just strongly feel as if it is a fairytale, created so that society had a reason for morals, because conformists don't have the full mind capacity to think for themselves, and decide what is right and wrong. So in turn, they needed someone to create guidelines for them. Which is fine, but it is a little out of control in this modern world. People are brainwashed from the time of birth, to believe in a story that is utterly inconceivable on a scientific level. Don't get me wrong, I'm not a science freak, however, everything that has literal proof in this world, can be shown through scientific facts. For many years now, I cannot put any belief in fideism. But, I'm alone in this journey in everyday life, being as I'm surrounded in such strong believers that God exists. Therefore, I confide only internally, and sometimes that's just not enough. I'm hoping I've found a community to help me with such a battle. Thank you, to everyone that has taken the time to read this, and give your welcomes, and responses.