The Newly Departed thread: announcements (departures)

[Joods]

Catholic_Lady, I think my mom would agree with me that motherhood is overrated

I doubt you meant that to be but it was very distasteful. To say the one thing someone wants more than anything is overrated is wrong.

Also everyone I am so sorry. I started all of this because I couldn't keep my mouth shut about one thing Kit said. I blew this up and others weighed in until it was ugly. I thought I was defending CL and it turned into this horrible conversation against her. I should know better than to comment on Kit's inhumane ways.

For anyone that thinks she was "whining" just know she isn't the only one. I haven't gone through half the shit she has and I created a blog to vent through. This was taken straight from it back in April 2017. You will notice very similar ways of thinking that can't be helped.

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Last month my period was two weeks late but I had one. I’ve gone months without a period at all. It’s not abnormal that my period is missing after three weeks. It doesn’t mean I’m pregnant.

But I want it to mean that.

I want to think that it could mean that and I want to go get a test. I know we are going to have ups and downs in this trial and error ordeal but I would rather minimize the downs by being realistic. Ya know one of my co-workers told me that I just need to stop thinking about it and it will happen. Said that she told another friend that and after a few years of trying and then going on vacation she got pregnant.

Bitch this isn’t your mind over matter shit. It’s been six years, doctor intervention is needed.

Ok that was mean, she was just trying to be supportive and I simply smile and nod in agreement. Two coworkers (one at the hotel and one at the bank) just had babies. I try and be supportive and happy. Another one just got married and is talking about trying to conceive. I’ve always been one to get jealous easily and I start playing the This Isn’t Fair Game. I can’t help it, I’ve become resentful of people with children, I know it’s petty and mean and unnecessary. Even if we don’t have a baby we will adopt. We will have kids to love and a family one day. Yet I can’t help the thoughts. Why do people that don’t deserve kids accidently get knocked up? Because I’m one to judge on who gets kids right? I feel like a horrible person when I get like this and sitting here nauseous and resentful I still don’t know if it is worth the mental pain to take the test.

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Motherhood is something literally engrained into most women's DNA. It what nature intended for us and when you feel like you failed at something so fucking basic meth heads do it without trying you feel really fucking bad about it. I am truly sorry for starting all this and letting my own emotions fuel it. CL if you are still reading this please know I never meant this to happen, you are often in my thoughts, and I only spoke up because I feel so much for you.

God Mandy, that was so touching. I want to hug you right now. You are not to blame here. You didn't write anything hateful. What started this was the hateful things that were said. 

Love you girl. I'm sure that was tough to share. It was tough to read because I felt it so much. I don't have any other words.