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a new atheist and marriage
#17
RE: a new atheist and marriage
(August 7, 2017 at 5:05 pm)Thegoodatheist Wrote: Hey Everyone! 

I wanted to come on here because I wanted to get some opinions 

I never grew up very religious (although my family did celebrate christmas), but in my teens I considered believing in God and got very serious about being a Christian. I even was a Mormon at one point. 

During that time I dated someone and he was atheist. He was the first atheist I date and he grew up as an atheist. 

We discussed how important my faith was, but thankfully and eventually since we were dating I decided to look into what he believed (or rather didn't believe). I got a ton of books on atheism and read about it. About a year after we dated I decided to go with logic and abandoned my belief in God. It was probably the best thing I decided to do. Two years ago I started college and am still in college. I am 29 now and after a long time devoting myself to magical crap I became a logical person. Education only helped me become a more logical thinker. 

I am still with the same man and we're engaged now. Going to be 4 years together soon. 

What I'm curious about is the fact that I still cling to the idea of traditional marriage and traditional gender roles. Me and my fiance have always lived in a traditional relationship. He makes a good income and I go to school. I clean and cook, but I enjoy doing things like that. As a Christian I always had a basis in God for how to behave in a relationship and be a good girlfriend (or soon to be wife).. now that I am a non believer I still believe in traditional roles but I've taken God out of the mix. 


I am wondering if there actually exist atheist like me. Are there Christians who turned atheist and still believe in traditional gender roles? I can't find anything online about a conservative atheist or an atheist who have traditional roles. 

To me it's clearly possible to be a traditionalist (even if you're female) and not be Christian 
Just like it's possible to be an atheist with a moral compass

Atheism is simply the lack of belief in gods.  That's it.  It's not a philosophy, there are no tenets, no hierarchy, nothing that binds us as atheists except for the lack of belief in gods.  So, there are conservative atheists, liberal atheists, libertarian atheists, communist atheists, anarchist atheists, etc.  Atheism doesn't define us, and, frankly, it tends to be really low on the list of terms that can define us (although the freshly deconverted seem to be rah rah about their atheism, but that usually passes with time).

So, with all that said, relationship advice: good relationships are based on open and honest communication.  It doesn't matter if it's a business relationship, a friendly relationship, or intimate relationship... if the people involved are honest and can express themselves with that honesty, then the battle is already won.

As long as you and your future husband can talk to each other about the important stuff, then the rest is gravy.  Do what you think will make the relationship work and make you happy.  It's really as simple as that.
"I was thirsty for everything, but blood wasn't my style" - Live, "Voodoo Lady"
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Messages In This Thread
a new atheist and marriage - by Thegoodatheist - August 7, 2017 at 5:05 pm
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by paulpablo - August 7, 2017 at 5:22 pm
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by Crossless2.0 - August 7, 2017 at 5:27 pm
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by Thegoodatheist - August 7, 2017 at 5:43 pm
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by Brian37 - August 7, 2017 at 5:57 pm
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by Thegoodatheist - August 7, 2017 at 6:05 pm
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by drfuzzy - August 8, 2017 at 9:46 am
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by Brian37 - August 7, 2017 at 5:28 pm
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by Thegoodatheist - August 7, 2017 at 5:51 pm
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by Brian37 - August 7, 2017 at 6:06 pm
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by Succubus - August 7, 2017 at 7:32 pm
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by Minimalist - August 7, 2017 at 5:30 pm
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by Alex K - August 7, 2017 at 5:50 pm
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by brewer - August 7, 2017 at 6:13 pm
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by Brian37 - August 7, 2017 at 6:30 pm
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by brewer - August 7, 2017 at 6:40 pm
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by Brian37 - August 7, 2017 at 6:46 pm
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by brewer - August 7, 2017 at 9:12 pm
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by Whateverist - August 7, 2017 at 6:39 pm
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by KevinM1 - August 7, 2017 at 7:17 pm
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by bennyboy - August 7, 2017 at 9:17 pm
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by Seraphina - August 7, 2017 at 9:34 pm
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by Astonished - August 7, 2017 at 9:50 pm
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by Seraphina - August 7, 2017 at 10:10 pm
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by paulpablo - August 8, 2017 at 1:35 am
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by Seraphina - August 8, 2017 at 9:58 pm
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by bennyboy - August 8, 2017 at 8:38 am
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by ignoramus - August 8, 2017 at 5:57 am
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by Astonished - August 8, 2017 at 9:47 am
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by paulpablo - August 8, 2017 at 11:09 am
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by Catholic_Lady - August 8, 2017 at 8:30 pm
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by Jesster - August 8, 2017 at 8:34 pm
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by brewer - August 8, 2017 at 8:40 pm
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by Catholic_Lady - August 8, 2017 at 8:44 pm
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by brewer - August 8, 2017 at 8:48 pm
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by Astonished - August 8, 2017 at 11:20 pm
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by Brian37 - August 8, 2017 at 8:45 pm
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by drfuzzy - August 8, 2017 at 11:12 am
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by Joods - August 8, 2017 at 11:15 am
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by drfuzzy - August 8, 2017 at 11:21 am
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by Brian37 - August 8, 2017 at 11:31 am
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by chimp3 - August 8, 2017 at 11:16 am
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by c172 - August 8, 2017 at 11:38 am
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by Dropship - August 8, 2017 at 12:12 pm
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by Brian37 - August 8, 2017 at 12:26 pm
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by drfuzzy - August 8, 2017 at 1:58 pm
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by Dropship - August 8, 2017 at 3:51 pm
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by drfuzzy - August 8, 2017 at 4:39 pm
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by Brian37 - August 8, 2017 at 6:36 pm
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by Hammok Man - August 8, 2017 at 6:38 pm
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by Brian37 - August 8, 2017 at 6:57 pm
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by johan - August 8, 2017 at 10:36 pm
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by Catholic_Lady - August 8, 2017 at 10:41 pm
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by Dropship - August 9, 2017 at 7:23 am
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by Brian37 - August 9, 2017 at 7:31 am
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by Dropship - August 9, 2017 at 7:37 am
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by Brian37 - August 9, 2017 at 8:17 am
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by Dropship - August 9, 2017 at 11:41 am
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by Brian37 - August 9, 2017 at 12:31 pm
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by Astonished - August 9, 2017 at 9:35 pm
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by Catholic_Lady - August 9, 2017 at 8:19 am
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by Brian37 - August 9, 2017 at 8:30 am
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by Catholic_Lady - August 9, 2017 at 8:57 am
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by FatAndFaithless - August 9, 2017 at 8:59 am
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by Brian37 - August 9, 2017 at 9:16 am
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by Astonished - August 9, 2017 at 10:52 am
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by FatAndFaithless - August 9, 2017 at 11:05 am
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by Astonished - August 9, 2017 at 11:13 am
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by FatAndFaithless - August 9, 2017 at 11:17 am
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by Catholic_Lady - August 9, 2017 at 11:26 am
RE: a new atheist and marriage - by FatAndFaithless - August 9, 2017 at 11:44 am

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