Double Standard

[Fruity]

I'm not sure if this goes in this forum, but here it goes:

I share my office with two girls, one Pentecostal and the other Catholic. I'll call them Penny and Cathy. Penny has a cross statue on her desk that reads something about "the lord" being the king of her work place. She takes her Bible with her everywhere she goes, prays before having her lunch, tells me how God is blessing my life every chance she gets, and often interprets things as signs from above. The other one is an advocate against abortion. That's Cathy. She gets fired up just talking about it. She wears clothes with slogans sometimes, since she participates in topic related events after work. All I do is wear my little rainbow wrist band sometimes and they sit there and talk about homosexuality being a sin. They think I'm stupid and I won't notice that they want to send me a message because of my band.

So Friday they began talking about religion and I pretended to be texting, since I think it is unethical and ridiculous to talk about religion and politics at work. Penny is annoyed by my indifference and asks in a rather high voice, "So, why aren't you saying anything? Are you offended by us?" I respond, "No. I'm not offended. I simply choose to not participate in discussions related to religion or politics at work, because it's a boundary I do not care to cross. But, do continue. I'm fine." Cathy gets obviously angry (I can tell by her aggressiveness) and bursts, "Why! What's your religion?" I answer, "I'm sorry, I thought I was clear that I don't care to participate. I have no problem in identifying myself as an atheist, but I will not discuss this any further, since it would probably be unhealthy to our work environment." Needless to say, they don't talk to me anymore. Not even if I need to get answers regarding common clients. They decided to simply ignore me. I no longer exist.

Fucking double standard hypocrites! Or... are they? That's my question. I have it clear that their belief is ironic, naïve, and full of gaps, but I want to consider their decision of not engaging in a healthy co-worker relationship with me. Does it make sense that, since they believe in a jealous and punishing god, they choose to express their loyalty by not talking to me anymore? I mean, to me it's ridiculous that I have to put up with their bullshitty means of expression (banners, cross pictures, etc.) and they don't tolerate my fucking wrist band, but does it make sense in any way? I don't have to be loyal to anyone (meaning no god). So, I have no problem in allowing them to keep their stuff even though it's annoying and I could, by policy, request them to take it off. On the other hand, they decide to pretend I don't exist, because I'm atheist.

So, does it make sense? Would it not make sense if they did continue to talk to me? Or, is there no possible way this could make sense, since god is love (so they should love me), but god is cruel, so they should fear him if not loyal to him? Any opinions or similar experiences?

No need to answer to all of this. Just needed to share with someone who understood.

[Minimalist]

Not even if I need to get answers regarding common clients.

Your approach seems best suited to a business environment right up until these two shitheads get to this point. Then, it becomes your boss' concern. You have every right not to participate in extraneous conversations in the office. They do not have a right to harm the business of the company because of their superstitious nonsense.

[Angrboda]

I'm not sure I understand your question. (I'm a bit hurting atm.) But I would observe that shunning, social ostracism, and "the silent treatment," are hardly the exclusive province of religion and the religious, though perhaps their role in religious discourse bears some inspection.

[Neo-Scholastic]

IMHO, the workplace is about work. It's not about making friends or making conversation about your personal life. Discussions about values may come up related to ethical business conduct but that's about it. I have come to prefer private lunches away from work associates.

[Fruity]

Oh, I know this could harm my clients. I care too much about their progress in treatment, so I will have to speak up. That's not in question. I'm just wondering if, even though they have to change their behavior, it sort of makes sense they behave this way.

And chadwooters, I am fond of private lunches, too. Especially since I know about all of their beliefs and just how much they are against almost everything I base myself on, so having lunch with people like this would be pointless. I'd hear nothing more than forks and plates clashing, and that would kill my appetite.

[Tonus]

I'm just wondering if, even though they have to change their behavior, it sort of makes sense they behave this way.

Considering that their behavior could have a negative effect on the business they work for, it doesn't make sense. If they decided that working with an atheist was so intolerable, it would make sense for them to leave and find other work. But not to take action (or inaction, in this case) that could harm their employer.

[Cyberman]

I reiterate the point made by Min and others. I've worked in an office environment back when I was in the DWP and I understand the importance of cultivating a healthy working relationship with colleagues, both on a professional and a personal level. Being given the cold shoulder for any reason is bad enough and would make the job unneccesarily harder as it is; having those childish headgames affect one's ability to do the job for which they're paid crosses the line. Personally that would be the point at which I'd bring the matter to official attention.

[Strongbad]

---

I'm not sure if this goes in this forum, but here it goes:

I share my office with two girls, one Pentecostal and the other Catholic. I'll call them Penny and Cathy. Penny has a cross statue on her desk that reads something about "the lord" being the king of her work place. She takes her Bible with her everywhere she goes, prays before having her lunch, tells me how God is blessing my life every chance she gets, and often interprets things as signs from above. The other one is an advocate against abortion. That's Cathy. She gets fired up just talking about it. She wears clothes with slogans sometimes, since she participates in topic related events after work. All I do is wear my little rainbow wrist band sometimes and they sit there and talk about homosexuality being a sin. They think I'm stupid and I won't notice that they want to send me a message because of my band.

So Friday they began talking about religion and I pretended to be texting, since I think it is unethical and ridiculous to talk about religion and politics at work. Penny is annoyed by my indifference and asks in a rather high voice, "So, why aren't you saying anything? Are you offended by us?" I respond, "No. I'm not offended. I simply choose to not participate in discussions related to religion or politics at work, because it's a boundary I do not care to cross. But, do continue. I'm fine." Cathy gets obviously angry (I can tell by her aggressiveness) and bursts, "Why! What's your religion?" I answer, "I'm sorry, I thought I was clear that I don't care to participate. I have no problem in identifying myself as an atheist, but I will not discuss this any further, since it would probably be unhealthy to our work environment." Needless to say, they don't talk to me anymore. Not even if I need to get answers regarding common clients. They decided to simply ignore me. I no longer exist.

Fucking double standard hypocrites! Or... are they? That's my question. I have it clear that their belief is ironic, naïve, and full of gaps, but I want to consider their decision of not engaging in a healthy co-worker relationship with me. Does it make sense that, since they believe in a jealous and punishing god, they choose to express their loyalty by not talking to me anymore? I mean, to me it's ridiculous that I have to put up with their bullshitty means of expression (banners, cross pictures, etc.) and they don't tolerate my fucking wrist band, but does it make sense in any way? I don't have to be loyal to anyone (meaning no god). So, I have no problem in allowing them to keep their stuff even though it's annoying and I could, by policy, request them to take it off. On the other hand, they decide to pretend I don't exist, because I'm atheist.

So, does it make sense? Would it not make sense if they did continue to talk to me? Or, is there no possible way this could make sense, since god is love (so they should love me), but god is cruel, so they should fear him if not loyal to him? Any opinions or similar experiences?

No need to answer to all of this. Just needed to share with someone who understood.

---

Oh, they're just doing what their holy book instructs them to do:

2 Corinthians 6:14 "Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?"

And believe me, they think they have their priorities in order: God first, then customers.

[Fruity]

Exactly! That's what I was thinking on my way home while trying to see what makes them behave this way.

[Dragonetti]

I know most work places have a policy against this type of discussions. This can lead to issues that can interrupt the productivity of employees and breed a hostile work environment. I congratulate you for having the courage to stand up to these religious bullies.

They do have a double standard. They want to hear about their religious view, and they want justification for their views. They would throw a fit, if you put something on your desk which does not align to their religious view.

Remember they consider themselves a minority, which is being persecuted by the all other religious views.

Drag