The Insult Thread

[Baalzebutt]

I came across a stash of great insults and, rather than wait to use them on specific people, I thought it would be a good idea to start a thread where you can post your best insults to no one in particular.

Here are a few to get started:

I would call you stupid but that would be an insult to stupid people.

I would slap you but I don't want to get dick on my hand.

I hope your asshole grows tastebuds.

Your mother fucks for bricks so she can build your sister a whorehouse.


Bring 'em on!

[Baalzebutt]

Really? No one has any good ones?

Here are a couple more:

You look like a "before" picture

You, sir, are unremarkable and unmemorable in every aspect.

I'd call you a cunt but you lack the warmth and the depth.

[Brian37]

If I wanted any lip from you I'd scrape it off of my zipper.

"Cum dumpster" is one, the first time I heard it was glad I wasn't drinking anything, would have choked because I laughed so hard.

Have you ever been caught fucking your sister? No? Must be a good hiding place.

[Violet]

That... was entirely lackluster for a first post filled-to-brim with insults. It didn't have class, it didn't have passion, and it was missing what every good insult needs: a couple of Canadian princesses skinny dipping in the Yukon. Not that the gloriously Baalze-coloured donkey what wrote such soulless tripe would necessarily stand at attention and hearken back to the deep counsel I have provided it prior to its current dysfunctionality... that it cannot make sense of but the simplest insults writ by the simplest of persons is not the fault of its teacher, but of the times prior to not leaving stupid children behind.

Since that's over your head, and not coming to it, I shall simplify my elementary observations... bringing them down to your level, hopefully: You're a decades-long kindergarten-dwelling limpdick motherfucking cocksleeve of a heartless nobody so absent passion, brains, and beauty that all women are terrified by the the ugly and deformed micropenis that your are the arrant embodiment of, and that's the naked truth, eh?!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zarl1kTCjco

There is no such being as a non-personal insult. I would recommend that instead of cramming your memory full of worthlessly baseline 'insults' accessed only by memorization of other people's usages of such: you fill it with an adaptable catalogue of phrasing, words, and methods of putting these together... again, I would recommend this, unfortunately: I would not recommend this for you.

[Jackalope]

Winner.

/thread

[Jackalope]

"Cum dumpster" is one, the first time I heard it was glad I wasn't drinking anything, would have choked because I laughed so hard.

I'll see your cum dumpster and raise you a cock juggling thundercunt.

[Violet]

Winner.

/thread

Nah, I made a mistake with 'your are'. It was hard to get that out, since I was doing it a very chaotic environment, and I was expected in several different places at the same time... which are excuses, of course Oh well, I bet most minds wouldn't even catch that.

I know yours didn't

* Violet is surprised at how sparsely populated this thread is. She bets that it won't last.

[Jackalope]

I've prepared a witty retort that a four year old could understand.

Let me know when you find one and I'll have them explain it to you.

[Brian37]

The best part of you ran down your daddy's leg.