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Another Story
#1
Another Story
It all started when I was born. (Jk, this isn't going to be /that/ long.)




And now here I am almost a full year later. Just me. I haven't gone back to the church my family does simply because I see no use in torturing myself with the doubt that it can bring (I still struggle with a large amount of indoctrination, which can trigger panic attacks and etc, not pleasant.)

My parents agreed that I could stay as long as I don't 'poison' my siblings. Which has left me with a bit of a quandry recently as to what to do since my sister finally asked me why I don't go to church.

"If I walk into the building..... I'LL BURN!!!"
Devil
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#2
RE: Another Story
Welcome! Your situation remind me of mine three months ago. Leaving a church that your family is devout in can make things particularly frustrating. Especially when leaving religion and the idea of god in general! I know, I was Mormon! Religion is a clusterfuck.

My siblings have just came to the conclusions my parents have, which aren't precise by any means, but keeps their questions silences till they are old enough where I can speak of my ideas freely with them without family contraversy.

Welcome and best wishes to you! Smile

(I left the church 10 months ago. Just three months ago things were still messed up. )
"Just call me Bruce Wayne. I'd rather be Batman."
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#3
RE: Another Story
That's tough. Best wishes, and I hope you find some help and solidarity here.
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#4
RE: Another Story
(August 11, 2014 at 10:47 am)Quantum1Connect Wrote: Welcome! Your situation remind me of mine three months ago. Leaving a church that your family is devout in can make things particularly frustrating. Especially when leaving religion and the idea of god in general! I know, I was Mormon! Religion is a clusterfuck.

My siblings have just came to the conclusions my parents have, which aren't precise by any means, but keeps their questions silences till they are old enough where I can speak of my ideas freely with them without family contraversy.

Welcome and best wishes to you! Smile

(I left the church 10 months ago. Just three months ago things were still messed up. )
I honestly kinda miss when my sister wasn't terribly religious, but now she's jumping in head first now that she's in a place with such a high concentration of biblically minded, and it's reminding me a lot of how I used to be. I just hope she doesn't crash as badly as I did.


Strange how fast things can change. My parents still think I'll come around eventually, but it's difficult to make it clear just how massive the change was in mental processes. Mostly what I get to hear are their assumptions on what I think, without the actual interest in questioning if I think that way at all.

Terribly frustrating. *sends hugs*

(August 11, 2014 at 10:56 am)Diablo Wrote: That's tough. Best wishes, and I hope you find some help and solidarity here.
Blush Much appreciated.
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#5
RE: Another Story
(August 11, 2014 at 5:04 am)Raevoryx Wrote: And then we moved from the Bay Area to the Bible Belt and I died inside at the thought of a church on every corner and decided to stay closeted as much as possible.
Sorry to hear it, but glad you got 'saved' from Christianity. Greetings from the Bay Area Big Grin
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#6
RE: Another Story
(August 11, 2014 at 7:02 pm)ShaMan Wrote: Sorry to hear it, but glad you got 'saved' from Christianity. Greetings from the Bay Area Big Grin
Bong Got any spare sushi perhaps? Afro
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#7
RE: Another Story
(August 11, 2014 at 7:10 pm)Raevoryx Wrote: Bong Got any spare sushi perhaps? Afro
You know it grows on trees here. I'm never at a loss.
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#8
RE: Another Story
Welcome Big Grin
Why Won't God Heal Amputees ? 

Oči moje na ormaru stoje i gledaju kako sarma kipi  Tongue
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#9
RE: Another Story
Quote:I honestly kinda miss when my sister wasn't terribly religious, but now she's jumping in head first now that she's in a place with such a high concentration of biblically minded, and it's reminding me a lot of how I used to be. I just hope she doesn't crash as badly as I did.

Strange how fast things can change. My parents still think I'll come around eventually, but it's difficult to make it clear just how massive the change was in mental processes. Mostly what I get to hear are their assumptions on what I think, without the actual interest in questioning if I think that way at all.

Terribly frustrating. *sends hugs*


Wow! It's as if I am reading my own story. It is incredibly difficult, no doubt. Just be careful not to reciprocate the audacity of assumptions and apathy those around you might inflict upon you. Try to be better than me and be the bigger man (or woman). Take everything they say like a joke, don't let it hurt you.

Trust me, sometimes we have to choose relationships over values and sometimes that means compromising our own beliefs in the sense that we have to let all the shit that the religious throw at us roll off of us. You can fight back, but if you're like me, you'll want to pick your battles because of the love for you family.

Some people just don't care and alienate their family and cut ties, but that's up to you.

It's been a couple months since I have engaged someone in my family regarding religious belief, but today I think I will have the chance with my aunt. I only chose to do so because she publicly made the claim that I had used the people in the church. I knew not how I did, so I engaged her by asking how I had used people in the church...then I backed up my evidence as to why her religion is a sham.

These days, I don't care to much to de-converted people, but rather create mutual understanding. That and the fight to keep religion out of my government. I can get pretty nasty with that. haha

*hugs back*

If you need an ear to listen or someone to talk to, we are all here. Send my a PM if you would like.

Your Friend,
Q1C
"Just call me Bruce Wayne. I'd rather be Batman."
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#10
RE: Another Story
(August 13, 2014 at 12:21 am)Quantum1Connect Wrote: Wow! It's as if I am reading my own story. It is incredibly difficult, no doubt. Just be careful not to reciprocate the audacity of assumptions and apathy those around you might inflict upon you. Try to be better than me and be the bigger man (or woman). Take everything they say like a joke, don't let it hurt you.

Trust me, sometimes we have to choose relationships over values and sometimes that means compromising our own beliefs in the sense that we have to let all the shit that the religious throw at us roll off of us. You can fight back, but if you're like me, you'll want to pick your battles because of the love for you family.

Some people just don't care and alienate their family and cut ties, but that's up to you.
I guess I've been struggling with the fact that if I do end up coming out as an Atheist publically (which I most likely will once I move out) my parents will potentially be blamed for my lack of faith as if they got something horribly wrong in the whole indoctrination thing.

How far do you go to put the relationships first though? I could alienate my family and cut ties, and they remain with a positive position within the 'greater family cell', putting their long-term benefit (I mean, I'm just one person, they have a whole grape-vine of family members in the Baptist Church).

My grandmother once said that she was glad I moved 'back' from California, because (and I quote) "The whole state is going to break off into the ocean because of all the gays and unbelievers... so much sin". (I had a minor heart attack while hearing that from her and nearly retailiated by saying "Nah, they're just moving 'Back Home'".)

Quote:It's been a couple months since I have engaged someone in my family regarding religious belief, but today I think I will have the chance with my aunt. I only chose to do so because she publicly made the claim that I had used the people in the church. I knew not how I did, so I engaged her by asking how I had used people in the church...then I backed up my evidence as to why her religion is a sham.
I avoid talking about religion as much as possible with my family (mainly my mother), as they (she) has a poor concept of boundaries and little respect for 'No' and 'I'm done talking for now'. She gets terribly emotionally invested, and I'm horrible at explaining (let alone talking) when someone is ranting voilently at me. Deadpan

I do have an Aunt who was very open to talking rationally about religion, and I was pleasantly surprised that she shared some of my opinions, even if she still goes by the title of 'Christian'.

I hope your talk with your Aunt goes well. Worship (I'unno why I like this smiley so much, but it's glorious.)

Quote:These days, I don't care to much to de-converted people, but rather create mutual understanding. That and the fight to keep religion out of my government. I can get pretty nasty with that. haha
OH, friggin politics. Voted for the first time just a week (or so) ago, talk about nerve wracking. Nothing like being forced to choose between Rep. or Dem. in front of your very right-wing father. *shiver*

Quote:*hugs back*

If you need an ear to listen or someone to talk to, we are all here. Send my a PM if you would like.

Your Friend,
Q1C
I'm both glad and sad to hear that you also share many of the experiences (or at least similar ones) to what I've gone through. It's difficult to deal with so much pre-judgement and antagonistic behavior when all that you want is to be understood. ^^"

I think I'll take you up on that offer soon perhaps? It's very nice to meet you. Big Grin

Rae
Infp
Panic
"Fear of the truth is the greatest deterrent to its acceptance. " - Joseph Lewis
"Death means nothing to the affairs of the world. " - Joseph Lewis
"When Reason and Peace of Mind no longer act in sync, it's time to get your shit together." - Me
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