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RE: Movies that just suck.
May 19, 2015 at 8:43 am
(This post was last modified: May 19, 2015 at 8:44 am by Alex K.)
I wonder in which category Alien vs. Predator 2 falls. It is astonishingly incoherent in plot and style, but seems to be meant as a serious effort.
(May 19, 2015 at 7:06 am)PäronMårts Wrote: (May 18, 2015 at 3:11 pm)Neimenovic Wrote: The Room doesn't count, right?
ok, then Birdemic... or Sharknado, so much badness
The Room is a one of a kind work of art. Bizarre, hilarious, disastrous.
I really dislike Sharknado and all those deliberately retarded movies whose makers only point seems to be "LOL look how bad and retarded the movie we made is!". I like bad movies that are sincere and heartfelt.
The fool hath said in his heart, There is a God. They are corrupt, they have done abominable works, there is none that doeth good.
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RE: Movies that just suck.
May 19, 2015 at 9:23 am
(May 19, 2015 at 7:06 am)PäronMårts Wrote: I really dislike Sharknado and all those deliberately retarded movies whose makers only point seems to be "LOL look how bad and retarded the movie we made is!". I like bad movies that are sincere and heartfelt.
You haven't lived until you've seen Sharktopus. I was channel surfing the guide with my wife close by. By name alone I figured this dandy would get a rise out of her so I tuned in. After about five minutes she looks up from her laptop for about 30 seconds and says, "are you fucking kidding me?". Having accomplished my mission I turned the channel only to be confronted with "What are you doing? We at least have to see what this thing looks like.". Two hours later we were both dumber for the experience. It was so inane we just couldn't stop watching; train wreck style.
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RE: Movies that just suck.
May 19, 2015 at 11:05 am
(May 18, 2015 at 3:02 pm)Stimbo Wrote: Oh, Prometheus. More like Plot-hole-eus. It's the recent(ish) trend of seeing how many popular references they can cram in before anyone realises they're just looking at a lump of shit. Same goes for the Abrams Star Treks as well. "Hey, they said Delta Vega! That was in Star Trek! Wait, how can Spock see Vulcan from there? Why didn't Scotty notice it get destroyed?" And on and on...
I actually really liked Prometheus. I get your point with the overload of references though, but the film itself was decent I thought. Problem is, it seems like the beginning of a two parter to me. Like, it was a good first half of a story but it was so obviously begging for a sequel. It's like the film only tells half a story and you're left watching her space ship fly away like "okay, let me see what happens" and what should be the best part of the story is left to the very end and you don't ever discover what the point was.
The last film I watched (I say watched, I mean turned on about 20 minutes after the start and ended up watching about 45 minutes of it) was Noah. Man, I love Russell Crowe, and I adore Emma Watson. But damn, this was a car crash. The script was dire. The premise is awful enough anyway I suppose. I mean, I wasn't expecting it to be good, it's about Noah's ark for christ sake, but it managed to be even worse than I thought it would be.
The new "amazing spiderman" films suck too IMO. They've got nothing on the Tobey Maguire trilogy.
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RE: Movies that just suck.
May 19, 2015 at 11:56 am
(This post was last modified: May 19, 2015 at 11:57 am by Faith No More.)
The worst movie has already been mentioned. "Batman and Robin" was just a shitfest of epic proportion.
M. Night Shamalamaman's "The Village" is also one of the worst offenders. Five minutes into it I made a joke about the plot, and it turned out to be the twist ending! Bleh. "The Happening" was really bad,too. Even Mark Walhberg regrets that one. Mr. Shamalama-ding-dong should be banned from film-making.
The Matthew Broderick "Godzilla" remake also deserves a mention.
I actually didn't mind Prometheus. It was a bit disappointing, and the main character was off-putting due to the fact that she was a believer in bullshit nonsense. Visually, however, it was top notch.
Even if the open windows of science at first make us shiver after the cozy indoor warmth of traditional humanizing myths, in the end the fresh air brings vigor, and the great spaces have a splendor of their own - Bertrand Russell
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RE: Movies that just suck.
May 19, 2015 at 12:01 pm
Any movie in the Fast and Furious franchise.
I hate them so much it hurts.
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Movies that just suck.
May 19, 2015 at 12:51 pm
(May 19, 2015 at 12:01 pm)SteelCurtain Wrote: Any movie in the Fast and Furious franchise.
I hate them so much it hurts.
You just lost cool points.
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RE: Movies that just suck.
May 19, 2015 at 12:54 pm
(This post was last modified: May 19, 2015 at 12:57 pm by downbeatplumb.)
Cloud Atlas.
I lasted 45 minutes and I do not even know what kind of movie it was let alone what it was about.
Fantastic actors wasted in an incoherent mess.
Oh and the tourist. Such hack predictable writing. I watched the first five minutes and hoped it wouldn't unfold as I predicted, but it did and it was supposed to be "twist"filled.
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RE: Movies that just suck.
May 19, 2015 at 1:33 pm
Divergent.
The book was even worse, but the movie was bad. I forced myself to finish the book (because people were raving about it, I thought, it's going to get good soon, right??/), then made my husband watch the movie because misery loves company, and he needed to understand HOW HARD THAT STORY SUCKS! I do not get why anyone, anywhere, like it at all. Tris is a whiney, self entitled, thoughtless, cruel bitch who I wanted to die the entire time. The whole single personality faction thing is the dumbest plot device ever thought up, no matter how it might be explained later.
Utter garbage through and through.
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RE: Movies that just suck.
May 19, 2015 at 1:56 pm
@ downbeatplumb
Cloud Atlas is not that incoherent, it just has a nonstandard way of telling the story. If you quit too early, you won't understand anything.
The fool hath said in his heart, There is a God. They are corrupt, they have done abominable works, there is none that doeth good.
Psalm 14, KJV revised edition
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RE: Movies that just suck.
May 19, 2015 at 2:08 pm
Titanic
Whoever fights monsters should see to it that in the process he does not become a monster. And if you gaze long enough into an abyss, the abyss will gaze back into you
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