Our server costs ~$56 per month to run. Please consider donating or becoming a Patron to help keep the site running. Help us gain new members by following us on Twitter and liking our page on Facebook!
Current time: December 25, 2024, 5:19 am
Atheist Forums › Discussion › Humor v
The Jewish Problem

Thread Rating:
  • 0 Vote(s) - 0 Average
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
Thread Modes
The Jewish Problem
gargantuan Offline
Newbie
*
Religious Views: Hardened Atheist
Posts: 50
Threads: 7
Joined: September 18, 2010
Reputation: 3
#1
The Jewish Problem
September 18, 2010 at 9:44 am
No, this isn't going to be the rant of a hate filled neo nazi.....

So, this jewish kid comes home from school one day and his dad asks how the day had gone.

"Oh, fine," says the kid, "I've decided I wan to be a christian."

His dad is shocked, "But you can't be a christian, you're a jew. I'm a jew. Your grand pappy is a jew. We're jews all the way back to abraham!"

"Im sorry" says the kid, "But all my school friends are christians and it's my choice."

With that, the kid leaves the room. The dad is heart broken at this news and decides to call his rabbi for advice and explains the problem to him.

"It's funny you should come to me with this problem" explains the rabbi, "when my son was your sons age, he too came home and told me he wanted to be a christian."

"And what did you say to him?" asked the dad.

"Well I told him he couldn't be a christian, that I was a jew, his grand pappy was a jew, that we were jews all the way back to abraham. But it didn't make a difference. It was his decision and he was sticking to it. So I turned to my rabbi for advice. I turned to god."

"And what did he say?" Asked the dad

".... It's funny you should come to me with this problem."
Find
Reply
tackattack Offline
Non-Militant Hippie Lover
*****
Religious Views: Non-denominational Christian
Posts: 4446
Threads: 87
Joined: December 2, 2009
Reputation: 47
#2
RE: The Jewish Problem
September 18, 2010 at 9:49 am
Actually the wife of our pastor is a Jewish Christian; they're not mutually exclusive from the Christian non-denominational side. I don't know about from an orthodox jewish side.
"There ought to be a term that would designate those who actually follow the teachings of Jesus, since the word 'Christian' has been largely divorced from those teachings, and so polluted by fundamentalists that it has come to connote their polar opposite: intolerance, vindictive hatred, and bigotry." -- Philip Stater, Huffington Post

always working on cleaning my windows- me regarding Johari
Find
Reply
gargantuan Offline
Newbie
*
Religious Views: Hardened Atheist
Posts: 50
Threads: 7
Joined: September 18, 2010
Reputation: 3
#3
Wink 
RE: The Jewish Problem
September 18, 2010 at 10:26 am
(September 18, 2010 at 9:49 am)tackattack Wrote: Actually the wife of our pastor is a Jewish Christian; they're not mutually exclusive from the Christian non-denominational side. I don't know about from an orthodox jewish side.

Oh.... the jokes not funny now. Thanks for that Wink

Find
Reply
tackattack Offline
Non-Militant Hippie Lover
*****
Religious Views: Non-denominational Christian
Posts: 4446
Threads: 87
Joined: December 2, 2009
Reputation: 47
#4
RE: The Jewish Problem
September 18, 2010 at 11:28 am
I'm definitely the wet towel of the group.. I'm far too serious for my own good, unless you get a few beers in me.
"There ought to be a term that would designate those who actually follow the teachings of Jesus, since the word 'Christian' has been largely divorced from those teachings, and so polluted by fundamentalists that it has come to connote their polar opposite: intolerance, vindictive hatred, and bigotry." -- Philip Stater, Huffington Post

always working on cleaning my windows- me regarding Johari
Find
Reply
Oldandeasilyconfused Offline
Senior Member
****
Religious Views: Agnostic Atheist
Posts: 7388
Threads: 168
Joined: February 25, 2009
Reputation: 45
#5
RE: The Jewish Problem
September 18, 2010 at 6:41 pm
(September 18, 2010 at 9:49 am)tackattack Wrote: Actually the wife of our pastor is a Jewish Christian; they're not mutually exclusive from the Christian non-denominational side. I don't know about from an orthodox jewish side.


Let me guess: he's a Jew who accepts Jesus was the Messiah? If so,it makes perfect sense ,and in fact he had no choice.


I gather he's not very bright.Angel Cloud

Find
Reply
tackattack Offline
Non-Militant Hippie Lover
*****
Religious Views: Non-denominational Christian
Posts: 4446
Threads: 87
Joined: December 2, 2009
Reputation: 47
#6
RE: The Jewish Problem
September 18, 2010 at 7:31 pm
the pastor isn't a jew..his wife is.. and I don't know how smart she is.. she seems rather fundie when we speak.
"There ought to be a term that would designate those who actually follow the teachings of Jesus, since the word 'Christian' has been largely divorced from those teachings, and so polluted by fundamentalists that it has come to connote their polar opposite: intolerance, vindictive hatred, and bigotry." -- Philip Stater, Huffington Post

always working on cleaning my windows- me regarding Johari
Find
Reply


Atheist Forums › Discussion › Humor v
The Jewish Problem

Possibly Related Threads...
Thread Author Replies Views Last Post
  Why Are Non-Jews Non-Jewish? Edwardo Piet 10 1804 August 31, 2017 at 12:51 pm
Last Post: Cyberman
  Jewish Sterotypes gargantuan 3 1552 September 19, 2010 at 1:41 am
Last Post: Minimalist



Users browsing this thread: 1 Guest(s)