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The Neverending SFW Penis Thread
#41
RE: The Neverending SFW Penis Thread
I'm not sure I should participate. I'm still a growing boy with active glans.

Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
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#42
RE: The Neverending SFW Penis Thread
^ Oh don't get yourself down.
I'm certain you can get a head in this thread.
"If we go down, we go down together!"
- Your mum, last night, suggesting 69.
[Image: 41bebac06973488da2b0740b6ac37538.jpg]-
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#43
RE: The Neverending SFW Penis Thread
My penis favorite song: It's Hard to be Humble. 

Should include: My Ding-A-Ling.
Being told you're delusional does not necessarily mean you're mental. 
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#44
RE: The Neverending SFW Penis Thread
My wife's all-time favourite joke:  What's the only good thing to ever come out of a penis?




Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
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#45
RE: The Neverending SFW Penis Thread
ROFLOL

Best. Thread. Ever!

My thread will be the longest and sexiest and dirtiest and longest thread in ze world!!!!!!!!!-!

(June 15, 2017 at 4:42 pm)Cyberman Wrote:
(June 15, 2017 at 4:22 pm)Alex K Wrote: This thread is becoming a bit too penile for my taste

I don't know what they taste like, so I can't possibly comment.

This deserves to be enshrined forever here in the dick thread.
If I were to create self aware beings knowing fully what they would do in their lifetimes, I sure wouldn't create a HELL for the majority of them to live in infinitely! That's not Love, that's sadistic. Therefore a truly loving god does not exist!

Quote:The sin is against an infinite being (God) unforgiven infinitely, therefore the punishment is infinite.

Dead wrong.  The actions of a finite being measured against an infinite one are infinitesimal and therefore merit infinitesimal punishment.

Quote:Some people deserve hell.

I say again:  No exceptions.  Punishment should be equal to the crime, not in excess of it.  As soon as the punishment is greater than the crime, the punisher is in the wrong.

[Image: tumblr_n1j4lmACk61qchtw3o1_500.gif]
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#46
RE: The Neverending SFW Penis Thread
One of my favorite jokes.


Quote:While examining the the body of Mr. Schwartz, a mortician notices that Schwartz has the largest penis he has ever seen.

"I'm sorry, Mr. Schwartz," says the mortician, "But I can't send you to be cremated with a tremendously huge penis like this. It has to be saved for posterity."

The mortician removes the penis, places it in a jar and puts the jar in his briefcase. When he gets home, he decides to show it to his wife. "I have something to show you that you won't believe," he says, removing the jar from his briefcase.

"Oh my God!" she screams, "Schwartz is dead!"
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#47
RE: The Neverending SFW Penis Thread
(June 15, 2017 at 5:50 pm)ignoramus Wrote: OK ladies, but you'll find most men struggle to discuss erectile dysfunction.
It's just too hard!

Viagra overdose?

Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni:

"You did WHAT?  With WHO?  WHERE???"
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#48
RE: The Neverending SFW Penis Thread
That just gives you a stiff neck.
At the age of five, Skagra decided emphatically that God did not exist.  This revelation tends to make most people in the universe who have it react in one of two ways - with relief or with despair.  Only Skagra responded to it by thinking, 'Wait a second.  That means there's a situation vacant.'
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#49
RE: The Neverending SFW Penis Thread
Luckie, speaking seriously and maturely, why the preoccupation with dickie birds?

You may as well rename this thread to LA LA LAND.
No God, No fear.
Know God, Know fear.
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#50
RE: The Neverending SFW Penis Thread
I wrote this joke decades ago. First some background. In health care settings we occasionally use a condom catheter to treat urinary incontinence in men. It attaches to the penis like a real condom only the condom is attached to drainage tubing and bag. It is not inserted into the bladder. External only. Another name for the condom catheter is the Texas catheter. So, the joke....

Why is the condom catheter called a Texas catheter?

Because no man wants to be told he only needs a Rhode Island catheter.
God thinks it's fun to confuse primates. Larsen's God!






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