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Atheist Forums › Science › General Science v
Hurricane Lane

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Hurricane Lane
Haipule Offline
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#1
Hurricane Lane
August 22, 2018 at 2:39 am
The Islands of Hawaii are totally freaked out by what is about to come upon them. Truth be told, I prayed this storm thingy away from me days ago, demanding and commanding God. Why not, I AM His son right? I do what I want!

But Geez! They are all just freakin' out! But, God will come through for me at the 11th hour and fifty-nine minutes and fifty-nine seconds, as He always does: my Hero, Friend and Father we call "Jesus"! Yet, I already told them that I prayed it away from me.They don't know what the people of Florida understand about me, having lived there for 9ys without incident and all claiming, "we are way overdue"! It's just so cool bein' me! (a few months after I leave, they were hit by two--yeah, I gots power!) 

Yeah, I gots powers! "Nothing is impossible for him who believes(keeps on trusting)!" (Bible quote)
My girlfriend thinks I'm a stalker. Well...she's not my girlfriend "yet".

I discovered a new vitamin that fights cancer. I call it ...B9

I also invented a diet pill. It works great but had to quit taking it because of the side effects. Turns out my penis is larger and my hair grew back. And whoa! If you think my hair is nice!

When does size truly matter? When it's TOO big!

I'm currently working on a new pill I call "Destenze". However...now my shoes don't fit.
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Gawdzilla Sama Offline
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#2
RE: Hurricane Lane
August 22, 2018 at 5:26 am
Then why hasn't any Good Christian ever prayed for an end to war?
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Angrboda Offline
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#3
RE: Hurricane Lane
August 22, 2018 at 10:43 am
"The hands that help are better far than the lips that pray." ~ Robert Ingersoll

Preparation, not masturbation.
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Astreja Offline
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#4
RE: Hurricane Lane
August 22, 2018 at 11:01 am
I've been watching Lane on the NOAA hurricane site for a couple of days. Hopefully it keeps heading due west and passes the islands reasonably far to the south.

Stay safe, Haipule.
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mlmooney89 Offline Donators
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#5
RE: Hurricane Lane
August 22, 2018 at 11:18 am
My sister is living with her husband and two children in Hawaii. They can't even get bottled water at this point.
“What screws us up the most in life is the picture in our head of what it's supposed to be.”

Also if your signature makes my scrolling mess up "you're tacky and I hate you."
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Aroura Offline
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#6
RE: Hurricane Lane
August 22, 2018 at 11:53 am
Yikes! I hope it passes by, and everyone stays safe (and has water!)
“Eternity is a terrible thought. I mean, where's it going to end?” 
― Tom Stoppard, Rosencrantz and Guildenstern Are Dead
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Minimalist Offline Donators
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#7
RE: Hurricane Lane
August 22, 2018 at 12:10 pm
OTOH, maybe all that rain will cool the lava?
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Anomalocaris Offline
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#8
RE: Hurricane Lane
August 23, 2018 at 8:14 am
(August 22, 2018 at 12:10 pm)Minimalist Wrote: OTOH, maybe all that rain will cool the lava?

But where would our friend sniff volcanic gases if the lava cools?
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Gawdzilla Sama Offline
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#9
RE: Hurricane Lane
August 23, 2018 at 8:17 am (This post was last modified: August 23, 2018 at 8:18 am by Gawdzilla Sama.)
Every USN ship that could make it to sea has left Pearl Harbor.
(August 22, 2018 at 12:10 pm)Minimalist Wrote: OTOH, maybe all that rain will cool the lava?

Remember the Icelandic town that stopped a lava flow? Well, they used a torrent of water just to "build" a dam to divert the flow.
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brewer Offline Donators
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#10
RE: Hurricane Lane
August 23, 2018 at 8:19 am
If Haipule is the savior the islands are fucked. 

[Image: 23390.jpg]
Being told you're delusional does not necessarily mean you're mental. 
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Atheist Forums › Science › General Science v
Hurricane Lane

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