(August 26, 2016 at 3:20 pm)Nymphadora Wrote: lmao...

That should be knocking you out, not making you high

half a mg knocks most people out. I, however, being the Xanax pro that I am, can drive on 3mgs of the stuff.

I can remain upright for over an hour on 20mg of Valium. :-)
It's been a while since I needed them though.

CIJS...
I wish you were dead. I realize how horrible it makes me seem, to wish death upon a fellow human. You're not human, though. I wish I had more courage. I feel I had responsibility in a way in every time after that one in which I wasn't involved. Had I been brave, maybe you wouldn't be roaming around with the rest of us. I don't hate you. I'm afraid of you. For some inexplicable reason, I can't hate you and fear you at the same time. The thought of you makes me feel sick to my bones and I feel dead inside. I don't have space in my mind to hate you. Your scent makes me sick. Sometimes clients smell like you and I hate them, even though I can't hate you. Flip phones remind me of you. Foam cups. VCRs. And I hate them. I wish you could read this. I wish you could feel the pain you created. Then again, I think you'd like it. Maybe then I'd hate you. Just... stop. Stop. Leave people alone. Stop. Do the world a favor. I'm telling you right now that if I see your face at the bottom of a vodka drink one more time, I'll scream. You know... I'll scream with a voice. A voice. But I stay away from vodka. I stay away from you. Just stay away from me, too. I kept my word. Leave me the fuck alone.

I'm so sorry bestie That sounds awful

Sending you lots of hugs

CIJS: They sound like an absolute piece of shit. Leave my sis alone you fuckface!

(August 26, 2016 at 6:35 pm)Little lunch Wrote:

(August 26, 2016 at 3:20 pm)Nymphadora Wrote: lmao...

That should be knocking you out, not making you high

half a mg knocks most people out. I, however, being the Xanax pro that I am, can drive on 3mgs of the stuff.

I can remain upright for over an hour on 20mg of Valium. :-)
It's been a while since I needed them though.

A security guard at my local shopping centre was fired for selling Valium to people. Pretty sure the recording a woman giving her partner a blowjob in the car park at night also contributed to it.

No idea why I'm telling you this, it's just what comes to mind when someone mentions Valium.

Wtf is CIJS?!

(August 27, 2016 at 9:12 pm)Luckie Wrote: Wtf is CIJS?!

CIJS = Can I just say

I think.

(August 27, 2016 at 7:57 pm)Mamacita Wrote: CIJS...
I wish you were dead. I realize how horrible it makes me seem, to wish death upon a fellow human. You're not human, though. I wish I had more courage. I feel I had responsibility in a way in every time after that one in which I wasn't involved. Had I been brave, maybe you wouldn't be roaming around with the rest of us. I don't hate you. I'm afraid of you. For some inexplicable reason, I can't hate you and fear you at the same time. The thought of you makes me feel sick to my bones and I feel dead inside. I don't have space in my mind to hate you. Your scent makes me sick. Sometimes clients smell like you and I hate them, even though I can't hate you. Flip phones remind me of you. Foam cups. VCRs. And I hate them. I wish you could read this. I wish you could feel the pain you created. Then again, I think you'd like it. Maybe then I'd hate you. Just... stop. Stop. Leave people alone. Stop. Do the world a favor. I'm telling you right now that if I see your face at the bottom of a vodka drink one more time, I'll scream. You know... I'll scream with a voice. A voice. But I stay away from vodka. I stay away from you. Just stay away from me, too. I kept my word. Leave me the fuck alone.

You could send him my way if he troubles you, see if maybe you can hate him after watching him get punched in the throat.

I'll use my ring hand and everything.

(August 26, 2016 at 3:20 pm)Nymphadora Wrote: lmao...

That should be knocking you out, not making you high

half a mg knocks most people out. I, however, being the Xanax pro that I am, can drive on 3mgs of the stuff.

Esqui is over six feet tall of sexy man --I'm frankly surprised one mill is enough for him! X) 
I wish someone could come up with a medicine to counteract medication resistence. Hell, even for street drugs that ability would save lives in overdose deaths!
I'm told they can help with if you're allergic to a medicine now they can make you not allergic to it? I look forward to seeing this voodoo magic in person when I get back to that facet of my million problem body.

CIJS -
People wonder why I'm bitchy most of the time. Well if you had to think for other people, you'd be bitchy too. I made dinner. You all ate it. So why couldn't any of you be arsed to clean up afterwards?
Ooooh that's right...because rather than taking some sort of initiative, you were waiting to be told what to do. Fuck. That.
Don't expect me to do anything for any of you tomorrow because I was up past 1am cleaning the kitchen while you all slept away your hard day of sitting around doing nothing.
Fuck this house and fuck people who can't show some respect. I. Am. Done.

Can I just say...

It's not about me. I know. I know that. My feelings are irrelevant on this, what matters is you, making you feel better, making you feel safe. It's all that I want, with my irrelevant feelings, but when I heard what you said, when I see you suffering, I can't help but feel angry. Like doing a whole lot of very, very unkind things, that I know won't help you and won't do anything of worth, because the damage is already done, but I can't help it. The idea that anyone would dare to hurt you makes me want to hunt them down and punch and punch until I can no longer feel my fists, then keep punching until they no longer hold the shape of a fist, and even then I wouldn't be done, but I can't and it wouldn't do any good even if I did. So many people I care about have been hurt the way you were, too many, and it just lingers in my mind, builds up like some psychic pressure in my head, so that the inhuman shits that did it become nothing more than totems, faceless devils that just... need... to die. And for you, and for her, and her, and everyone else, all I want to feel is my teeth clenching at their throats as I tear them out. It's no better than they deserve.

But it's not about me. It never could be. And I don't want to feel this way, only because I don't want any part of me to be diverted away from doing everything I can to help you. And I'm sorry.