You weren’t. It’s a personal thing.

I've been away for a few days, but came back to check out what was going on, as I've been in contact with Stimbo and he told me again that he no longer feels welcomed here.

I don't know exactly what happened behind the scenes, and I'm not defending whatever it was he may have done/said to upset people. I'm sure whatever it was, it was wrong and uncalled for.

I guess I just wanted to point out again that he has been through an extremely traumatic, devastating loss that turned his whole world upside down, and has been understandably struggling to recover from that. I know for myself, if I lost my husband I would be all kinds of messed up. I dont think it is something I would ever recover from. My husband is my life, and my life partner. I can't even imagine what that must have been like for Stimbo to go through losing HIS life partner. He didnt have kids, so she was all he had in terms of nuclear family.

He is dealing with enormous amounts of pain, and feelings of extreme loneliness and isolation from having gone through something not very many people can relate to, and from being unable to fill the void of losing a life partner by finding someone else.

I guess what I'm trying to get at is that he has/is suffering enough already. Whatever wrongdoing he is responsible for behind the scenes, he is already doing "penance" for just by living his life without his life partner and feeling sad and lonely every day.

I would encourage maybe more patience/understanding with him, or at least refraining from clapping back with hurtful comments. Even if you think he deserves them, just remember that he's been dealt with something far worse than he ever deserved... and perhaps just leave it at that.

People have the right to say what they want, this is just my 2 cents.

You have absolutely no idea. None of that is remotely relevant. I know it's not your fault that you have no clue, but you have no clue. There are no excuses for some things, like incels. There's no excuse for incels.

I don't care if he feels unwelcome, and I don't say that for my benefit. I think if he keeps playing the victim card, both here and behind the scenes with unwitting victims like you, the top is going to blow off his awful charade sooner rather than later. If he wants to keep pushing, I'll fucking out him without the slightest regret or he can just fuck off and let me just look like an asshole meanie who ran off a regular. I'm cool with either option. His choice.

I'd like to add that those of us who know who he really is were happy to just let it be, but there are things he does that dredge up the reason he is a loathed figure for some of us. If what we say is bothering him, it's his fault for stirring the pot. For my part, I think it's better this way. I'm not big on secrets and bullshit. Air it all out, baby.

(August 19, 2018 at 1:34 pm)Shell B Wrote: You have absolutely no idea. None of that is remotely relevant. I know it's not your fault that you have no clue, but you have no clue. There are no excuses for some things, like incels. There's no excuse for incels.

I don't care if he feels unwelcome, and I don't say that for my benefit. I think if he keeps playing the victim card, both here and behind the scenes with unwitting victims like you, the top is going to blow off his awful charade sooner rather than later. If he wants to keep pushing, I'll fucking out him without the slightest regret or he can just fuck off and let me just look like an asshole meanie who ran off a regular. I'm cool with either option. His choice.

I'd like to add that those of us who know who he really is were happy to just let it be, but there are things he does that dredge up the reason he is a loathed figure for some of us. If what we say is bothering him, it's his fault for stirring the pot. For my part, I think it's better this way. I'm not big on secrets and bullshit. Air it all out, baby.

I have no idea what's going on.

(August 19, 2018 at 1:42 pm)downbeatplumb Wrote:

(August 19, 2018 at 1:34 pm)Shell B Wrote: You have absolutely no idea. None of that is remotely relevant. I know it's not your fault that you have no clue, but you have no clue. There are no excuses for some things, like incels. There's no excuse for incels.

I don't care if he feels unwelcome, and I don't say that for my benefit. I think if he keeps playing the victim card, both here and behind the scenes with unwitting victims like you, the top is going to blow off his awful charade sooner rather than later. If he wants to keep pushing, I'll fucking out him without the slightest regret or he can just fuck off and let me just look like an asshole meanie who ran off a regular. I'm cool with either option. His choice.

I'd like to add that those of us who know who he really is were happy to just let it be, but there are things he does that dredge up the reason he is a loathed figure for some of us. If what we say is bothering him, it's his fault for stirring the pot. For my part, I think it's better this way. I'm not big on secrets and bullshit. Air it all out, baby.

I have no idea what's going on.

I'm sure you will soon.

This is the problem with being polite. I could tell you all what Stimbo did that made the admins unanimously remove him from staff, but I’m personally against revealing information about users which is their own business. The mods don’t even know, this was an admin only decision.

Meanwhile, he gets to play the victim card and convince everyone that the world is against him. I can only give you my word, but if you saw the screenshots I saw, you would change your mind about Stimbo in an instant.

He’s welcome to post here. He’s not welcome to lie about what happened and expect no retaliation from those who are properly informed.

Side note: This mod knew for reasons that aren't about favoritism, before that shit gets started up again.

Like I said, I don't doubt that whatever it was he said/did behind the scenes is wrong. I respect you guys enough to know you wouldn't just feel dislike for someone for no good reason.

What I'm saying is just that he is suffering enough already. He lost his life partner unexpectedly all while unsuccessfully trying to start a family together. That's basically like losing your whole family (spouse/kids) overnight, and one of the worse things any human being can go through. He doesn't need anymore "punishment" in the form of hurtful comments. If he has broken forum rules, it is perfectly fair to ban him objectively. But I dont see the point in just clapping back with comments as a way to punish him or whatever, when he is already being punished by life itself.

Who said we’re clapping back as a means of punishment? Who says what he did has anything to do with losing his wife? Should I give you a list of the traumas I’ve had in my life so I can say horrendous things and be defended because I’ve lived? His problem isn’t that he lost his wife. It’s the entitlement he feels toward women. If you cared to look, his usertitle would tell you all you need to know. I won’t be lectured about this. There’s right and wrong. Excuses mean shit.

I’m not Catholic. I have no use for punishment or forgiveness here. There’s only the truth and the manipulation. You’re being manipulated.

(August 19, 2018 at 1:49 pm)Shell B Wrote: Side note: This mod knew for reasons that aren't about favoritism, before that shit gets started up again.

That's the confusing part. You were nice to him when it first came out (as evidenced by your comments on the departed thread when he left), and then when he came back a few months later, it's like your feelings had changed.

I assume something more must have happened between that time to make things change, but all I'm saying is there seemed to be at least some mercy at first. So you can perhaps understand where I'm coming from?