Do you care about your significant other's sexual past?

[CapnAwesome]

I want to know if protection is required in our lovemaking.

Wow, way to sound super prim and proper.

[Exian]

I like nerdy guys, and I do mean the kind that are a little socially awkward as well as very bright

Damn, one outta two ain't bad??

[Catholic_Lady]

I also enjoy talking about sex a great deal, particularly with women. Let me tell you a true story and something that can result from the 'wait until marriage' approach. So this comes from a woman I dated a few years back. She used to be married and had only had sex with her husband and while she was married she never or almost never had an orgasm. She just thought she was someone who was difficult to get off, that it was the biochemistry in her. After 5 or 6 years she ended up divorced and gets together with a guy and has sex with him. She gets off several times with him and thinks 'wow, there is something special about this guy.' She gets in a relationship with him that eventually doesn't work and ends up meeting another person. So around this time she's about 30 and this is the third person she's slept with. Anyway, she has multiple orgasms with that guy. As it turns out she was a very orgasmic person and her original Christian husband just didn't know what he was doing and blamed it on her. Now she's a much happier and kinkier person, rather than trapped in a relationship that never would have been sexually satisfying.

That's unfortunate.

To me though, that's just underlying of a much deeper issue in the marriage. A more loving, committed husband would listen to his wife and keep working at trying to satisfy her and trying new things, doing research, etc. Communication is very important too... perhaps she was being open to him about her needs, perhaps she wasn't.

Of course, waiting until marriage isn't a magical thing in and of itself, on it's own. It's the love and commitment and self gift to each other. If those are not present, then saving sex for marriage, by itself, isn't going to do anything for you either way.

[Exian]

I get the argument about sexual compatibility, but I'd say that you can get a pretty good sense of someone's sexuality through making out and good, honest communication about it.

Actually I'd agree with you about that.  But my idea of making out is extremely graphic and definitely includes genitals and orgasm.

This is why I only date artists.

[Jenny A]

Actually I'd agree with you about that.  But my idea of making out is extremely graphic and definitely includes genitals and orgasm.

LOL!

Yeah, I meant mostly just kissing. It's actually pretty amazing how intense kissing can get when that's the only thing you can do to express how much passion you have for the other person. It's like all those emotions/urges are condensed into this one act.

I know you did.  Or at least I suspected as much. 

Early kissing can be sexy and passionate as hell.  The thing is that without more, it's all about sexual longing.  And longing but not having just ups the ante without ever telling you what the person is really like in bed. I wanted to know what he was really like before commitment.   The worst sexual partner I ever had made my whole body sing just by stroking my wrist.  And he sure kissed nice.  But he was damn selfish in the sack.  Not to mention as fast as a rabbit.  The second might be cured, but not the first.

[Catholic_Lady]

LOL!

Yeah, I meant mostly just kissing. It's actually pretty amazing how intense kissing can get when that's the only thing you can do to express how much passion you have for the other person. It's like all those emotions/urges are condensed into this one act.

I know you did.  Or at least I suspected as much. 

Early kissing can be sexy and passionate as hell.  The thing is that without more, it's all about sexual longing.  And longing but not having just ups the ante without ever telling you what the person is really like in bed. I wanted to know what he was really like before commitment.   The worst sexual partner I ever had made my whole body sing just by stroking my wrist.  And he sure kissed nice.  But he was damn selfish in the sack.  Not to mention as fast as a rabbit.  The second might be cured, but not the first.

Ahhhhh... this actually made me kinda miss the days my husband and I just kissed... lol.

But only for a tiny second!

[Regina]

Experience definitely makes for amazing sex. You can be very well-endowed and physically attractive, and still be shit in bed if you don't know how to use what you've got.

I think the "should sex wait until marriage?" is a non-issue and a non-debate, because it comes down to personal choice and opinion.

[Thumpalumpacus]

My wife was a slut before I met her.

She still is.

We like it that way.

When my son's mom and I started going out and we had the conversation, she told me, "I was a slut." I told her, "that's okay, you're my slut now." She was incredible in bed and brought out of me pleasures and sensations I didn't know I could enjoy, be it roleplay, public sex, or genteel lovemaking.

Having broad horizons in sexuality is almost always a good thing.

[Catholic_Lady]

 be it roleplay, public sex, or genteel lovemaking.

I don't know which of these made me giggle harder - roleplay, public sex, or "genteel" lovemaking. Lol.

[Thumpalumpacus]

I want to know if protection is required in our lovemaking.

Wow, way to sound super prim and proper.

I'm just pretty fond of not exposing myself to STDs. Call me crazy.