Posts: 3395
Threads: 43
Joined: February 8, 2015
Reputation:
33
RE: Ask a married guy...
September 19, 2015 at 11:11 pm
(September 19, 2015 at 10:52 pm)Deidre32 Wrote: (September 19, 2015 at 10:22 pm)Pyrrho Wrote: I am not bored being married. I was very careful in choosing my wife, and am very happy to be with her. She is very nice and very smart and very reasonable. I like those qualities very much, and am very glad to be with her. I have been married to her over 20 years. If I could go back in time and not marry her, I would certainly not do that. I am very happy with my situation.
For anyone contemplating marriage, I recommend thinking very carefully about what you want out of life first, to make sure that whatever that is, is compatible with you getting married to whomever it is you are contemplating marrying. And also, be very careful about the person you are marrying. I recommend not getting married if your head and your heart do not both agree that it is a good idea. (If you need those metaphorical terms explained, just ask.)
I appreciate this advice. I understand the premise behind marriage, but if two people love one another, why involve the government?
It is a legal contract that affects a variety of things, such as inheritance, the ability to make healthcare decisions in the event of the incapacitation of one's spouse, taxes, etc. The exact nature of the legal implications varies by jurisdiction (in the U.S., it varies by state), but basically if you want the legal ramifications of marriage, then you might want to consider it, and if you do not want the legal ramifications of marriage, then you ought not marry.
Many people seem to forget that important fact that it is a legal contract with significant implications for one's life, and think of marriage as something that is purely romantic. That is a mistake, regardless of whether one is getting married or not. It is a legal contract, and it needs to be thought of as such. Before anyone agrees to marriage, one should consider the legal impact it has. And if one might ever move to another jurisdiction (e.g., another state, etc.), one should consider what it might mean for one if one does that. If one does not want the legal implications, then one should not marry. One should also be concerned about the possibility of a " common-law marriage" if one decides to live with someone, as one may get legally glued to someone without planning on it if one is not careful and if one is in a jurisdiction with common-law marriage.
"A wise man ... proportions his belief to the evidence."
— David Hume, An Enquiry Concerning Human Understanding, Section X, Part I.
Posts: 1891
Threads: 53
Joined: December 13, 2014
Reputation:
35
RE: Ask a married guy...
September 20, 2015 at 1:58 pm
(September 19, 2015 at 9:21 pm)MTL Wrote: (July 15, 2015 at 2:26 pm)Spooky Wrote: Actually we had Pi Cake, and Pi cupcakes.
Please tell me you are not kidding. Because that is awesome.
Nope, not kidding in the least
I reject your reality and substitute my own!
Posts: 1891
Threads: 53
Joined: December 13, 2014
Reputation:
35
RE: Ask a married guy...
September 20, 2015 at 2:02 pm
(This post was last modified: September 20, 2015 at 2:03 pm by Spooky.)
(September 19, 2015 at 9:42 pm)Deidre32 Wrote: Do you ever get bored being married? That'd be my worry if I ever get married.
Not really. I think I'm lucky since nothing really "changed" once we were married. One day we weren't, one day we were. *Shrug*
(September 19, 2015 at 10:22 pm)Pyrrho Wrote: (September 19, 2015 at 9:42 pm)Deidre32 Wrote: Do you ever get bored being married? That'd be my worry if I ever get married.
I am not bored being married. I was very careful in choosing my wife, and am very happy to be with her. She is very nice and very smart and very reasonable. I like those qualities very much, and am very glad to be with her. I have been married to her over 20 years. If I could go back in time and not marry her, I would certainly not do that. I am very happy with my situation.
For anyone contemplating marriage, I recommend thinking very carefully about what you want out of life first, to make sure that whatever that is, is compatible with you getting married to whomever it is you are contemplating marrying. And also, be very careful about the person you are marrying. I recommend not getting married if your head and your heart do not both agree that it is a good idea. (If you need those metaphorical terms explained, just ask.)
I agree, it wasn't something we did lightly. Though again, it didn't really change much.
(September 19, 2015 at 10:52 pm)Deidre32 Wrote: (September 19, 2015 at 10:22 pm)Pyrrho Wrote: I am not bored being married. I was very careful in choosing my wife, and am very happy to be with her. She is very nice and very smart and very reasonable. I like those qualities very much, and am very glad to be with her. I have been married to her over 20 years. If I could go back in time and not marry her, I would certainly not do that. I am very happy with my situation.
For anyone contemplating marriage, I recommend thinking very carefully about what you want out of life first, to make sure that whatever that is, is compatible with you getting married to whomever it is you are contemplating marrying. And also, be very careful about the person you are marrying. I recommend not getting married if your head and your heart do not both agree that it is a good idea. (If you need those metaphorical terms explained, just ask.)
I appreciate this advice. I understand the premise behind marriage, but if two people love one another, why involve the government?
For medical decisions and estate decisions and etc. That's why same sex marriage was such a big deal. It may not change the dynamic of a strong relationship, but there are tangible benefits to being "Legally Bound"
I reject your reality and substitute my own!
|