Hammy's Questions For You

[vulcanlogician]

I think he means like miracle whip. Salad dressing to us yanks.

[Edwardo Piet]

Flavored mayo on salad? Yuck

LOL nah it's not mayo that's flavored.

It's basically like mayo, in that it has a similar sort of flavor, but a little different, because it's not mayo.

It's a similar sort of thing and serves the same sort of purpose.

I definitely prefer mayo though.

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I think he means like miracle whip. Salad dressing to us yanks.

Nah definitely not the same thing under a different name. This is miracle whip:

Miracle Whip is made from water, soybean oil, high-fructose corn syrup, vinegar, modified corn starch, eggs, salt, natural flavor, mustard flour, potassium sorbate, paprika, spice, and dried garlic.

And this is salad cream:

Salad cream is a creamy, pale yellow condiment based on an emulsion of about 25–50 percent oil in water, emulsified by egg yolk and acidulated by spirit vinegar. It may include other ingredients such as sugar, mustard, salt, thickener, spices, flavouring and colouring The first ready-made commercial product was introduced in the United Kingdom in the 1920s, where it is used as a salad dressing and a sandwich spread. Due to the higher cost of ingredients during periods of rationing in the United Kingdom a flavour similar to mayonnaise was achieved in the creation of salad cream.

Apparently they are a little similar though:

Salad cream was not readily available in the United States until the 21st century (though Miracle Whip provided a similar, if thicker alternative); however, with the large population of British expatriates, especially in the Northeast, it is becoming more common. Major retail supermarket chains sell salad cream as a regular item. Many supermarkets sell national and store brands of salad dressing which resemble salad cream.

[Brian37]

My answer to all the questions is ABBA...... Come on, you knew that was coming.

[Losty]

I think he means like miracle whip. Salad dressing to us yanks.

Miracle whip is eww

[Whateverist]

I took a cafeteria approach and could I get an iced tea with that, no sugar (or mayo).


1. Beef, turtles, or buttsex? Just remember I'm always on top and inside; no probers need apply.


3. Least favorite cheese? American processed cheese like Velvita, if that counts as a cheese.


4. Most favorite bees? The locals.


5. Poker, Lizard geckos or this should be question 6?


20. Mint choc chip ice cream or lots and lots of buttsex? Butt see #1 above.


31.a. Are you sad that they're not finished yet? Yes.

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Ewww wtf is salad cream? Must be a British thing

It's in the tube applicator on the tray Hammy is holding in his lap.  You've got to shake it pretty good to any though.

[*Deidre*]

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Ewww wtf is salad cream? Must be a British thing

It's in the tube applicator on the tray Hammy is holding in his lap.  You've got to shake it pretty good to any though.

i can't hear youuuu

[The Industrial Atheist]

1. Beef, turtles, or buttsex? Turtles. or beef. as long as these aren't euphemisms

2. If you had to name your favorite hour of the day, which clothing would you wear? 1 pm Black Hocico or Suicide Commando T-shirt, jeans, sneakers

3. Least favorite cheese? probably colby

4. Most favorite bees? well wasps stingers don't embed in your skin, but they're crazy aggressive.. I leave bees alone, mostly they leave me alone.

5. If dinosaurs never became extinct, would you currently be in the middle of having your gall bladder ripped open by a raptor? Something like that, likely. With increased evolutionary pressure I'd probably be more physically hardy, or maybe a faster runner.

5. If Wednesday were the 11th day of the month, how many fingers would I be holding up? 5?

5. Poker, Lizard geckos or this should be question 6?

7. Poker, Lizard Geckos or frogs that play blackjack? I'd watch frogs play blackjack

8. Horses or donkeys?Horses

9. Donkeys or dinosaurs? I'd rather be chased by a donkey

10. Fundamentalist Christian or 3.5 Billion Hammy clones starting their own mayo cult? depends on how mayo obsessed the Hammy clones are

11. Mayo or salad cream? I don't have access to salad cream. On a sandwich, mayo.

12. Silliness or wackiness? Silliness most days, I did used to watch wacky Adult Swim shows sometimes years ago.

13. Wackiness or zaniness?Zaniness has it's place.

14. Zaniness or loopiness? Well in late evening loopiness.

15. Music or poetry? Music. I do appreciate poetry though, even though I lack a deep understanding of how it's done.

16. Film or TV?TV

17. Cucumbers used for the purpose of dildos or dildos used for the purpose of cucumbers? Ladies have to have solo fun sometimes. But I don't think I want them in my salad

18. Bipolar Bears or Borderlime Limes? Bipolar Bears

19. Lemon or lime?Lemon

20. Mint choc chip ice cream or lots and lots of buttsex?Love mint chocolate chip ice cream

21. Toffee ice cream or mint choc chip ice cream?mint chocolate chip

22. Toffee ice cream or buttsex? Toffee Ice Cream. That's something I haven't had but have significant interest in trying. But is that a gluten free flavor?...never mind I don't care. 

22. Yogurt or autistic blackjack? Yogurt

23. Poker or a 27 hour long game of monopoly that drives you batshit insane for about a week?lol poker

24. The color yellow or the sound of a fart? yellow

25. So much yellow everywhere so bright your eyes fall out, or so little farting you see the doctor about it? I want to keep my eyes lol

26. Complete lack of farting due to missing bowel or "Eat more beans"? I'll take the beans.

27. Doctor or vet? I want a doctor for myself

28. Vet or real doctor? If it's for my cat, I'll take a vet

29. Insult towards vets or Hammy being a silly twatface?probably neither

30. Silly twatface or tasty vaginahead? I'm not up on my anatomy. I didn't know they had that. Oh you mean that thing. Wait?

31. Did you enjoy wasting your time answering these questions? I've had worse times. 

31.a. Are you sad that they're not finished yet? I'm excited.

32. Is time you enjoyed wasting not wasted time, or is it incorrect to say you enjoyed wasting it if by doing so it was not a waste of time? Depends on how you look at it I guess.

33. Dandruff all over your freshly shaved head or microscopic invisible skin flakes falling off your butt into your cup of coffee and you only notice just after you took a sip of it?
Why would I be bent over, butt naked over coffee? But then I don't want to know how i look like bald..jeeeeeez I'll take the nasty coffee.

[*Deidre*]

It's like a different flavored mayo in a squirty tube.

Do you like it because it squirts?

[SaStrike]

Pet wussy

[*Deidre*]

1. Beef, turtles, or buttsex?

Beef

2. If you had to name your favorite hour of the day, which clothing would you wear?

Yoga pants

3. Least favorite cheese?

Sharp cheddar

4. Most favorite bees?

None, I'm allergic to all of them

5. If dinosaurs never became extinct, would you currently be in the middle of having your gall bladder ripped open by a raptor?

Wut?

5. If Wednesday were the 11th day of the month, how many fingers would I be holding up?

Too difficult of a question

5. Poker, Lizard geckos or this should be question 6?

None of the above

7. Poker, Lizard Geckos or frogs that play blackjack?

geckos

8. Horses or donkeys?

Horses

9. Donkeys or dinosaurs?

Sorry, donkeys, you lose again.

10. Fundamentalist Christian or 3.5 Billion Hammy clones starting their own mayo cult?

Um...er....uh...

11. Mayo or salad cream?

Mayo!

12. Silliness or wackiness?

Silliness

13. Wackiness or zaniness?

Zaniness

14. Zaniness or loopiness?

Zaniness

15. Music or poetry?

Both

16. Film or TV?

Netflix

17. Cucumbers used for the purpose of dildos or dildos used for the purpose of cucumbers?

Hmmm.

18. Bipolar Bears or Borderlime Limes?

Bipolar Bears

19. Lemon or lime?

Lime

20. Mint choc chip ice cream or lots and lots of buttsex?

Mint chocolate ice cream

21. Toffee ice cream or mint choc chip ice cream?

always mint, forever 

22. Toffee ice cream or buttsex?

toffee ice cream 

22. Yogurt or autistic blackjack?

yogurt

23. Poker or a 27 hour long game of monopoly that drives you batshit insane for about a week?

Poker

24. The color yellow or the sound of a fart?

yellow!

25. So much yellow everywhere so bright your eyes fall out, or so little farting you see the doctor about it?

You're crazy!

26. Complete lack of farting due to missing bowel or "Eat more beans"?

complete lack of farting 

27. Doctor or vet?

vet

28. Vet or real doctor?

How dare you not call a vet a real doctor! 

29. Insult towards vets or Hammy being a silly twatface?

Insult towards vet! lol

30. Silly twatface or tasty vaginahead?

The former

31. Did you enjoy wasting your time answering these questions?

Thoroughly

31.a. Are you sad that they're not finished yet?

A little

32. Is time you enjoyed wasting not wasted time, or is it incorrect to say you enjoyed wasting it if by doing so it was not a waste of time?

I enjoyed it in every way.

33. Dandruff all over your freshly shaved head or microscopic invisible skin flakes falling off your butt into your cup of coffee and you only notice just after you took a sip of it?

hahahahahaha!!! I'm done!