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Atheist Forums › Discussion › Humor v
Masturbation is Un-American

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Masturbation is Un-American
FifthElement Offline
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#1
Tongue 
Masturbation is Un-American
July 1, 2013 at 11:09 pm
Yep, here is the link:

http://whitehouse.georgewbush.org/initia.../index.asp

ROFLOL

P.S. Probably some of you seen this, but cracks the shit out me every single time I see it ...
Why Won't God Heal Amputees ? 

Oči moje na ormaru stoje i gledaju kako sarma kipi  Tongue
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Minimalist Offline Donators
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#2
RE: Masturbation is Un-American
July 1, 2013 at 11:32 pm
The republican solution? Act like a dick.
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Ryantology Offline
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#3
RE: Masturbation is Un-American
July 2, 2013 at 12:18 am
(July 1, 2013 at 11:32 pm)Minimalist Wrote: The republican solution? Act like a dick.

But under no circumstances touch one.
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Whateverist Away Donators
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#4
RE: Masturbation is Un-American
July 2, 2013 at 2:13 am
(July 2, 2013 at 12:18 am)Ryantology Wrote:
(July 1, 2013 at 11:32 pm)Minimalist Wrote: The republican solution? Act like a dick.

But under no circumstances touch one.

Spank not thy monkey lest thy spilleth the seed upon the ground which was meant for begatting!
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Darth Offline
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#5
RE: Masturbation is Un-American
July 2, 2013 at 4:47 am (This post was last modified: July 2, 2013 at 4:59 am by Darth.)
Based on wikipedia research that verse (which I'm not entirely sure is biblical by the way) should read as follows, I think:

Spankest not thine monkey, lest thou spillst thine seed upon the ground which was meant for begetting!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Early_Moder...h#Pronouns
Also, it's not entirely clear in your verse whether it's the seed or the ground that is meant for begetting, this sort of nonsense is how you end up with sects humping the soil, but not the surface of it. Perhaps the verse is simply explaining proper agricultural techniques.
God made Adam from soil right?

Also, I had to look up how to conjugate beget. Teehee.
Nemo me impune lacessit.
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Mystical Offline
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#6
RE: Masturbation is Un-American
July 2, 2013 at 5:13 am
Um is this a legit website? Looks like sonething I'd make for a laugh
If I were to create self aware beings knowing fully what they would do in their lifetimes, I sure wouldn't create a HELL for the majority of them to live in infinitely! That's not Love, that's sadistic. Therefore a truly loving god does not exist!

Quote:The sin is against an infinite being (God) unforgiven infinitely, therefore the punishment is infinite.

Dead wrong.  The actions of a finite being measured against an infinite one are infinitesimal and therefore merit infinitesimal punishment.

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I say again:  No exceptions.  Punishment should be equal to the crime, not in excess of it.  As soon as the punishment is greater than the crime, the punisher is in the wrong.

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pocaracas Offline
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#7
RE: Masturbation is Un-American
July 2, 2013 at 6:47 am
(July 2, 2013 at 5:13 am)missluckie26 Wrote: Um is this a legit website? Looks like sonething I'd make for a laugh

The thread is in the humor section for a reason! Wink
The best poe is the one that leaves you wondering if it's legit!
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zebo-the-fat Offline
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#8
RE: Masturbation is Un-American
July 2, 2013 at 6:48 am
Hey, I'm English, does that mean it's ok for me??
The meek shall inherit the Earth, the rest of us will fly to the stars.

Never underestimate the power of very stupid people in large groups

Arguing with an engineer is like wrestling with a pig in mud ..... after a while you realise that the pig likes it!

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littleendian Offline
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#9
RE: Masturbation is Un-American
July 2, 2013 at 6:49 am
Masturbation is a gift. Imagine everyone stopped masturbating! Society would collapse within weeks. Big Grin
"Men see clearly enough the barbarity of all ages — except their own!" — Ernest Crosby.
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CapnAwesome Offline Donators
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#10
RE: Masturbation is Un-American
July 2, 2013 at 8:39 am (This post was last modified: July 2, 2013 at 8:41 am by CapnAwesome.)
I know it's a humor website, but this shit actually happens and not just from Republicans. In one of the ultimate twists of irony Bill Clinton actually fired his Surgeon General for saying masturbation should be part of sex-ed.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Joycelyn_Elders
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Atheist Forums › Discussion › Humor v
Masturbation is Un-American

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