Dealing with Religious Friends

[Holden Caulfield]

So to all my atheist (or humanist or agnostic or no religion or whatever no god belief) how do you deal with or do you have staunch religious friends?

One of my best friends is hard core catholic (french catholic which if anybody here is from Manitoba or Quebec will understand). We grew up together and are like 2nd/3rd cousins (yeah he knows as one of them and again french catholics will understand how we know that, family is above all except "sky man").

At one point way back this guy, another agnostic (doesn't care about religion/god at all) friend and I were hanging out and we (agnostic friend and I) brought up creationist ridiculousness of 4000 year old earth to him and we asked him if he believed. Knowing our attitudes he refused to respond. We realized quickly that he actually believed that nonsense and stopped making fun of him for it as he was our friend.

Since then we've talked a bit about religion but he doesn't like bringing it up since neither of us can see eye to eye about anything in terms of that topic (although we agree on awesomeness of Canadian Football League, National Hockey League and hot women though not necessarily in that order haha).

Basically we skirt the issue to maintain friendship. So my question is how do you all deal with hardcore bible (or quran or whatever) thumpers that you grew up with or are friends with?

[Dystopia]

So to all my atheist (or humanist or agnostic or no religion or whatever no god belief) how do you deal with or do you have staunch religious friends?

One of my best friends is hard core catholic (french catholic which if anybody here is from Manitoba or Quebec will understand). We grew up together and are like 2nd/3rd cousins (yeah he knows as one of them and again french catholics will understand how we know that, family is above all except "sky man").

At one point way back this guy, another agnostic (doesn't care about religion/god at all) friend and I were hanging out and we (agnostic friend and I) brought up creationist ridiculousness of 4000 year old earth to him and we asked him if he believed. Knowing our attitudes he refused to respond. We realized quickly that he actually believed that nonsense and stopped making fun of him for it as he was our friend.

Since then we've talked a bit about religion but he doesn't like bringing it up since neither of us can see eye to eye about anything in terms of that topic (although we agree on awesomeness of Canadian Football League, National Hockey League and hot women though not necessarily in that order haha).

Basically we skirt the issue to maintain friendship. So my question is how do you all deal with hardcore bible (or quran or whatever) thumpers that you grew up with or are friends with?

I don't have any hardcore religious friends, I suspect any of my friends can be considered legitimately religious, even those who claim to be Christian are closer to the definition of Deism with Christian influences... My advice is to keep religion out of the topic, religious hardcore nuts will get furious if you start contesting their beliefs and even worse if you ridicule them...

[Holden Caulfield]

I don't have any hardcore religious friends, I suspect any of my friends can be considered legitimately religious, even those who claim to be Christian are closer to the definition of Deism with Christian influences... My advice is to keep religion out of the topic, religious hardcore nuts will get furious if you start contesting their beliefs and even worse if you ridicule them...

Yeah I agree I don't bring it up anymore. For reasons completely unrelated to religion we are on frosty (along with most of my "main" friend group) at best terms right now. That's not the issue. I'm not too concerned with my friendship with said individual right now.

I was just curious on how other atheists, particularly strong atheists that are on this site, deal with staunch religious friends. Want to see how others deal with this. Not looking for advice. Thanks though (no sarcasm).

[Dystopia]

I don't have any hardcore religious friends, I suspect any of my friends can be considered legitimately religious, even those who claim to be Christian are closer to the definition of Deism with Christian influences... My advice is to keep religion out of the topic, religious hardcore nuts will get furious if you start contesting their beliefs and even worse if you ridicule them...

Yeah I agree I don't bring it up anymore. For reasons completely unrelated to religion we are on frosty (along with most of my "main" friend group) at best terms right now. That's not the issue. I'm not too concerned with my friendship with said individual right now.

I was just curious on how other atheists, particularly strong atheists that are on this site, deal with staunch religious friends. Want to see how others deal with this. Not looking for advice. Thanks though (no sarcasm).

Well if we are talking about strong friendship bonds that won't fade by a debate about religion or god with diverging positions, then I guess atheists, specially gnostic atheists don't have a problem making their religious friends see that god and religion are bullshit... Of course most of us won't bring the topic unless a religious friend starts it, like saying 'Why don't you believe in god? god is real!'

[Losty]

I have a really close friend who is Jewish. We celebrated Hanukkah at my house with her last November. It was so much fun. Friends are friends regardless of religious affiliations. You don't have to agree with your friends on everything, you just focus on the things you have in common.

[Dystopia]

I have a really close friend who is Jewish. We celebrated Hanukkah at my house with her last November. It was so much fun. Friends are friends regardless of religious affiliations. You don't have to agree with your friends on everything, you just focus on the things you have in common.

Yes, people should think more about what they have in common rather what they don't have in common... And things people have in common are usually prevalent, even if some close minded people don't realize it.

[Nine]

If I've had any religious friends I haven't known about it. Its just rarely relevant.

[TheGamingAtheist]

Any of my religious friends do things they know they shouldn't. They inform me of these things and KNOW that it only gives me fuel to use against their religious bullshit. So, they avoid their religious babble with me

My older sister on the other hand, we argue and debate alllllll the time.

[Thumpalumpacus]

One of my best friends was a born-again Christian. We had no problem being friends despite our different views; we agreed that if we talked about it we'd do so in non-insulting terms, from both sides. And there were times we had some good conversations, and times where one or the other of us wasn't feeling it.

Another friend of mine converted when I was seventeen, and gave me the "believe or we can't be freinds" trip. So I told him to hammer sand up his ass, we didn't talk for years, but after some fence-mending maintained an off-and-on relationship -- until he physically attacked me once for deriding the idea of god(s). That was that, and I haven't spoken to him since.

[vorlon13]

Maybe instead of approaching from the atheist/agnostic side with your friend, explore his religiosity from the side of 100% strict Literalism.

Why does he eat shrimp and wear mixed fabric clothing? Why are gays condemned in Leviticus and his church supports that ?

See the problem (if it applies to his faith, otherwise find other examples) he has there? Somebody in HIS church knows better than God which rules apply and which ones don't. If his church is 'liberal' about remarriage following divorce and/or granting annulments, then why does his church know better than Jesus ??

Look for areas of belief and obedience to God where his faith is screwing up, and make him defend it. And if he goes there, then HE knows better than God and/or Jesus, and what does he think of that? How can a 'Christian' know better than Jesus about ANYTHING ??

Understand the risk, you might inadvertently convert him into a unreasoning Literalist, but frequently, I think most people will realize their church doesn't have much to do with God, rather it has a lot to do with the insincere bastards running it.